Where the Heart Is
by lhoorah
Summary: “You know, over the last few weeks, I almost, almost, in the darkest, most insane, most ridiculous recesses of my brain--almost--missed you. Almost." Dasey. Future Fic.
1. Chapter 1

_Hey, everyone! I thought, I'd take a shot at Dasey fanfic. Let me know what you guys think, if it's worth continuing._

A/N: This a future fic, so a lot's taken place since Casey and Derek graduated. What you need to know now: Casey's in residency, Derek's a hockey coach, and they're both living in the the old house. Hopefully, everything will make more sense as the story unfolds...

* * *

**Part 1: Home, Sweet Home **

_Why am I here?_

She was in her bedroom, which usually made sense. But, she was ninety-nine percent sure she'd passed out on the couch last night. She'd been so exhausted after another long, grueling, soul sucking shift at the E.R., she'd barely made it through the front door. Literally, she'd taken a few steps, faltered, and reached desperately for the couch. Then her head had hit the cushion and it was 'lights out.'

Casey shifted, feeling the familiar ache of overworked muscles, and looked blearily at the alarm clock: 9 am.

She couldn't remember the last time she'd slept until 9. She couldn't remember the last time she'd slept well, period. _Ah, the joys of medicine,_ she thought dryly.

She turned back to her other side, ignoring the clock, the nosey sunlight sneaking through her blinds, and all the thoughts of chores and bills and papers she'd have to handle on her day off. She just wanted more sleep. She just wanted to curl up into a ball and sleep herself into oblivion.

There was clanging and she started, body jerking on the bed.

_What the hell…?_

_Oh, Derek, _she thought dimly. He must have gotten back in town early.

That would explain her miraculous bed relocation. It would also explain why she wasn't wearing socks and shoes. She reached up to her hair. Her clip, the trusty gatekeeper of her tight, neat work 'do' was gone, too.

Wow, she thought. He could be really attentive. Even to the smallest, most random details. An angry pile of dishes in the sink….no, he wouldn't notice that. But, apparently he'd picked up on the fact that she hated sleeping with her socks on, or with her hair bound up.

There was more clanging, accompanied by muffled cursing, and she moaned, leaned up on a tired elbow and whined, "_DEREK!"_

Okay, so she'd been planning on being much nicer to him when he came back. All bright-eyed and supportive and wondering how the training camp went –(not to mention he'd been sweet taking care of her last night, and, god knows, Derek needed all the encouragement to be sweet she could possibly muster). But, seriously, she was trying to _sleep _here.

And, what in the world was he doing anyway? It sounded like pots and pans, but it was Derek, so that obviously couldn't be the case. Not on planet normal anyway.

"_YOU AWAKE?" _he cried back at her.

"Ugh, moron," she muttered under her breath, "IF I SAY 'NO' WILL YOU KEEP IT DOWN?"

"SORRY! STAY IN BED!"

He actually sounded sorry. Derek Venturi actually sounded sorry. What the hell was he up to? She narrowed her eyes, considering, before pulling the covers from on top of her, and sliding to the edge of the bed. She was damn tired. But, she was also suspicious. And, when Casey MacDonald was suspicious, there was no slowing her down.

Her feet searched blindly for pink, piggy slippers, found them and then she stood—sore, but determined.

First clue? On the outside of her door. A post-it with Derek's sloppy script: "I'm back."

"Well, duh, dumbass," she whispered, rolling her eyes.

She turned away, and Derek's bedroom door caught her attention. It was cracked open, a hockey bag, and other luggage scattered at his door and spilling out into the hallway. She frowned. Derek was messy, he'd always been. But, he at least usually kept the chaos leashed within his own bedroom. Her eyes focused in on one worn, red bag in particular. It was his old practice bag. He hadn't used that since he sprained his knee.

Okay. She was beyond suspicious now. "DEREK! WHY IS YOUR BAG OUT?"

No answer. Just more shuffling and banging, and it really _did_ sound like pots now. She was _so_ going to bust him.

She ran down the stairs—covertness abandoned—as her feet traveled the familiar path of the steps. She hit the foyer, pivoted, and sprinted to the kitchen.

"Gotcha!" she cried.

She'd caught him. Red handed. Right in the act of…cooking?

She looked at the small pot, the boiling water, the smirking man, standing there wearing her pink apron.

"Well, good to see you, too, Case."

It was good to see him.

She never told him, but she always missed him a little when he traveled. Sure, she wasn't at home a lot—what with the constant, endless rotations—but when she was the house always felt so big, and empty. And, she just didn't have the energy, the raw _him-ness _to fill it up by herself.

She let her secret happiness about him subdue her suspicion, let him reach for a brief squeeze of a side hug. "Sleep well?"

She slipped away and pouted at him. "Great. Until you started banging things."

He opened his mouth and she tugged at the apron, silencing him.

"What are you doing?" she asked him softly, but with firmness, "And, why are you pretend cooking?"

He cocked his brow. "There's no such thing as pretend cooking."

"I know; that's why it's pretend."

Derek sighed as Casey's hands slipped around him, like she was frisking him, until one finally reached out from the pocket of the apron, unveiling a small, plastic package.

"Custom mouth guard," she read, "Molds right to your teeth."

"I uh…" He looked sheepish, "Needed to boil it to uh, mold it."

She rolled her eyes. "Do they make these specifically for idiots, too?"

"Hey."

"Derek . You're supposed to stay off of your knee for at least another week. And, last time I checked, you kind of need your knees to play hockey. And, what…?" she couldn't stop herself, couldn't stop her voice from rising in bemusement as she took in the scene: pots and pans scattered about. "…You are so non-domestic that you couldn't even find the right pot to boil water?"

"You have a complicated system."

"I had a complicated system. Now, I have a complicated mess, and no food to show for it."

She sighed and walked towards the fridge. Someone had to cook or they'd both die hungry and annoyed.

"And you're not playing hockey," she said over her shoulder, "Not on my watch."

He tensed, pulled jerkily at the apron, and yanked it off. Casey, meanwhile, tried to pretend she wasn't bothered that _he _was so bothered with her only minutes after seeing her again.

"Home, sweet home," he grumbled.

"Oh, stop being a baby."

"I'm not a baby," he said petulantly. He slumped down unto the nearest kitchen chair, a soft pout riding his rough, stubbled face. "I'm a man. And, I'm hungry. Now cook for me, woman."

She arched a brow at him, testing him with warning blue eyes, but Derek shrugged it off and leaned back lazily in his chair. "_Then _I'm going to play hockey."

No, he wasn't. Casey would make sure of that. But, she was too tired--and again secretly jazzed he was back--to confront it head on. She'd take care of that after bantering with a side of breakfast.

"Okay, idiot," she said sweetly, head snooping around the fridge, "What would you like for breakfast?"

He took a moment and she turned back to him, apparently catching him off guard; because there was an odd quirk to his lips, which he instantly hid away when his eyes met hers.

"French toast and bacon."

"French toast and bacon what…?"

She waved her hand at him expectantly, like at a five year old, and he rolled his eyes and muttered, "Please."

"Thank you," she said prissily.

She began methodically taking out ingredients: eggs, milk, bread…where was the bread, did she eat all of it? Oh, it must have been behind the..._why was he looking at her like that?_

"Why are you looking at me like that?" she asked instantly, bumping the fridge door shut with her hip.

Derek raised his brows, surprised at her interrogation, and shrugged with bemusement. "You're still wearing your scrubs."

"Oh. Right."

She glanced over her apparel self-consciously, over the loose unfeminine hang of worn green, and frowned. Sure it was just Derek, but that didn't mean she _liked_ looking like a train wreck.

"You look like a train wreck," he said with a laugh.

"And, what? You're Brad Pitt?" she said instantly, suppressing any offense, "You look like crap. And, you probably smell like it, too--as always."

Okay, so the smelling thing was unfair. Derek, had stopped reeking--for the most part--sometime in college. But, he did look pretty tired. And a bit unkempt. His hair, which he'd kept relatively short over the last year, had become shaggier again, messy. His infamous baby face was peppered with stubble. And, under his eyes were the beginning of bags.

He stretched lazily, nonplussed, and continued watching her. "Ah, well the kids were crazy. Worst than girls: 'Aww, Coach D, I'm thirsty'; "Aww, coach, I'm exhausted'; "Aww, coach, I can't feel my legs.'"

"And, you're telling a future pediatrician this…why, exactly?"

"Eh, just for kicks."

Casey hid her smile from him by turning back to the cupboards. She opened a drawer to her left, pulled out a large mixing bowl, and grabbed a whisk.

"How was the fifth circle of hell?" She heard Derek ask behind her.

She snorted. 'Hell' was Derek's 'affectionate' nickname for her residency at St. John's. She was a third year, could almost see the light at the end of the tunnel before her training was done, but nonetheless it had been and remained to be a pretty grueling process.

"Hell was fine," she said dryly, "Only moderately hellacious. And now, I get a day off."

Derek rolled his eyes and muttered, "Whoopie."

"Hey, it's a big deal for me, butthead."

She reached over to smack his head, but he read her and swiftly dodged her hand.

"Of course, it's a big deal," Derek said when he was resettled in his chair, "You have no life."

"I have a life."

"Yeah, sleeping, eating, and crying… how lively."

"I do not cry."

Okay, so that was a lie. She'd cried more than once. But, that was pretty much an unavoidable part of medicine as far she knew. She'd seen an ex-marine burst into hysterical tears in the break room yesterday. It was a tough job.

She heard chair legs screech, heard the thuds of Derek's feet on tiles, and then she turned to find Derek behind her. He reached for her chin, his thumb tipping her head up so her confused gaze was aligned with his.

"What are you doing?"

"Looking deep into your eyes." He smirked, kind of; it didn't reach his gaze, "I can tell when you've been crying a lot."

"How?" She asked.

"I dunno."

He dropped his hand, and she shrugged, tried to sound casual. "Well? Have I?"

"Yeah," he answered.

_That's strange_, she thought. Since when had Derek Venturi become psychic?

She ducked her head and tried to busy herself with mixing. "Meh, well, you know…"

"You've been working really hard lately," he murmured.

"I always work hard. I'm Casey."

"I know, but…"

His cell phone went off, some generic ring tone running through the air, and Casey was happy for the interruption.

"One of the parents," he mumbled, his eyes shifting between her and the phone.

"Take it," she said breezily. She turned her back to him so he couldn't see just how unbreezy she was, "It'll be easier to cook without you distracting me."

The phone rang another time, and Derek hesitated before shuffling out the room.

**

Casey set the kitchen island for two, which was still-even after a year of living in the old house again--a weird sensation. Her memories there were filled with laughter and screaming, cereal bowls and rushed meals, dirty dishes and scattered work supplies. It was eerie to see it so…peaceful. It felt like déjà vu, like new experiences crawling over old ones.

But, then again, that's how she felt a lot in the old house. Like déjà vu, except….not somehow.

She could hear Derek in the next room, still talking down one of the player's parents. She hadn't caught all of the conversation, just parts: Bad grades…detention…groundings. Casey couldn't help but think how ironic it was, couldn't help but think of all the times George had been on the opposite side of such conversations.

She shook her head, unable to keep the tiny smile from her lips and set the juice pitcher on the table.

"Well that was the most fun I've ever _not_ had," Derek said, groaning as he stalked back into the kitchen.

Casey scrunched her nose. "That bad, huh?"

"Worst. Looks like Josh is off the team for at least a month."

Josh. No surprise there. He was like a little Derek junior: never doing homework, skipping class, pulling pranks, sneaking out with girls. And, of course, he was the star hockey player.

Derek sighed and slipped back into his chair and Casey joined him, shrugging. "Well, at least it's early on and not the playoffs."

"Yeah, now there's just that tiny little itty bitty getting to the playoffs part."

He grunted, which she knew meant he didn't want to discuss it any further, and pulled his plate close, almost protectively.

"Um…you're welcome?" Casey said after he took his first silent bites.

"The thank you's implied."

"I'm a woman, Derek. Nothing's ever implied."

"Fine," he said, eyes flashing with annoyance as he glanced up from his bacon, "Then it's ex-plied, happy?"

"Explied 's not a word, Mo Mo."

He groaned again, a near whine. "I told you to stop calling me that."

('Mo mo' was short for 'moron', a name for him that was about as old as their relationship. A few years back, she'd shortened it to something even more aggravating, just for fun.)

"And, I knew it wasn't a word…Co Co."

"That doesn't even make any sense." She rolled her eyes and filled his cup with juice, then hers. "It sounds like you're calling me hot chocolate."

"No, see, I actually like hot chocolate, that'd be the difference."

He smirked at her, the corner of his eyes crinkling with amusement and she leaned over, staring at him.

"Does hot chocolate cook you warm meals?" she asked him, "Does hot chocolate do your taxes for you? Does hot chocolate…"

"…ever shut up?" he finished, exasperated.

Casey glowered at him, but Derek tried his best to ignore her and get back to his plate.

"You know, over the last few weeks, I almost, almost, in the darkest, most insane, most ridiculous recesses of my brain--almost--missed you. Almost." Casey said, shaking her head with disbelief. Derek quirked his eyebrows, finally looking up as she continued, "Which obviously means either: (a) you're finally driving me insane along with you in the smelly car of your life, or (b) I had Derek amnesia."

"Derek amnesia is a very serious disease," he said, pointing his fork at her, "It's no joking matter."

Casey rolled her eyes, and smacked away the fork. Then she grabbed her own and started on her food. She felt Derek watch her for a moment, and she could sense the wheels moving in his head.

"You're one to talk though, about not being in the house, " he said, cutting into his French toast, "I can have Casey amnesia when we're in the same town."

_What? _Casey thought. What did that even mean? Was he actually, kind of, sort of saying he missed her, too, when she was on her rounds? Or was he just being Derek, and saying nothing at all, just taking up air space. She squinted, considering, when a strip of bacon hit her square in the face.

"What-the--Derek!"

"What?" He shrugged, that stupid, fake innocent smile on his mouth, "You looked confused, like you'd forgotten how to eat? I was just trying to help."

"Oh, I'll 'help' you, alright," She growled, leaning menacingly towards him.

"Oh, well that I'd love to see: Casey MacDonald, actually helping me and not annoying me."

"You won't see at all when I hit you in your face!"

She was smacking at his head before she even finished, and Derek took exactly one hit, before reaching for her arm, above her elbow, and pulling her to him, the chair legs screeching along.

"Oh, I just hate you!" Casey shrieked, as Derek bound her wrists effortlessly with one hand.

He smirked. "I thought pediatricians were supposed to be nice?"

"To kids," she cried back, "Is that what you are, a little baby?"

"Oh, oh, got me there, 'Doc'."

"You are so insufferable…"

She pried free and smacked him--again. Derek caught her and held her--again, both of them battling as laughter filled the kitchen.

**

That's it for now. Please let me know what you think :)


	2. Chapter 2

_Thank your for all your gracious feedback! _

_There's nothing more flattering or encouraging for an author. Also, a few of you had some questions about their current living situation, etc. I am going to touch on the house thing a little this chapter, but please trust that I'll reveal more as the story goes on (but feel free to let me know if I'm being __**too **confusing ;) )_

_Here's the next part. The and the first part are kind of like an extended introduction. The core plot lines will come in the next chapters.  
_

**Home Sweet Home Part 2**

******

"Please tell me that's not what I actually look like."

Casey squeezed her eyes shut, counted to three, and then opened them again, hoping someone much more clean, tanned, and well-slept would be looking back at her.

No, still her: exhausted, makeup smudged, and with sleep in her left.

"Oh, yeah, that's 'hot'," she muttered dryly.

She grimaced and ran a hand through her spastic bed head. She really needed to wash it. Like really, really badly. Then she needed to lock herself in the bathroom, take her body hostage, and do all those things that sexy girls were supposed to do. Like shave. And moisturize. Clip her toenails. She hadn't had a pedicure in a century. She moaned. She was too tired to be sexy.

But she had to at least _try,_ she guessed. Either that or buy a bunch of cats and a big house on the end of the street.

She sighed. At least she had the bathroom to herself, unlike her very crowded and very annoying high school years. It had been the source of about fifteen percent of her and Derek's fights, so they'd decided almost immediately after moving in together that one of them would use the one downstairs, and the other the one upstairs. The one downstairs was farther away, but Casey had haggled with him; allowing him to do whatever he wanted with their parents' old room if he took it. So, she got her own girly, impeccably hygienic bathroom; and he got his man cave. A veritable win-win.

She yawned, rolled a crick out of her neck, and then trudged towards the shower. The knob was a little rusty, fidgety.

She was really going to have to get Derek to fix that (or at least run around with George's old tool kit and pretend he could).

She rolled her eyes and smiled to herself.

Derek.

He really had become like a brother to her. A dorky, rude, overcompetitive brother, but a brother nonetheless. Sure, she was close to Edwin, and they'd always kept in touch, but Derek and her had gotten close and stayed close when her life was really changing and forming: college, homesickness, first apartments, career choices, the infamous pregnancy scare (or T.I.P.S. as they wryly referred to it), and now…residency.

Of course she'd never be able to fully see him as a flesh and blood brother—because 'eww', he was Derek, and if she was honest with herself—which maybe she wasn't always—Derek was an attractive guy, no matter how familial they'd become.

But, functionally, he was still her big bro. And, at some point over the years, (a moment she couldn't quite trace though she often chased after it in her mind), he'd become more than just an annoying big bro. He'd become someone who genuinely looked out for her and protected her. Her only guess was that it was connected to his first string of serious relationships, his new ability to actually express genuine affection toward the opposite sex.

He'd become gentler with her. Not that he ever cut her a break, or let her win anything, or backed down from an argument. But slowly, slowly, those little fragments of a sweet guy she'd seen in high school fleshed out and blended together until there was just a guy who was really, and entirely…sweet.

Derek would deny any such transformation venomously, but she could tell. A real jerk wouldn't carry her to bed at night when she was too spent to make it up there alone; or kill spiders for her at night; or move the heavy things she was too prissy to move herself; or drive back a day early from training camp (he wouldn't admit it, but she was smart and she'd figure it out,) just to catch her on her day off.

Diamond in the rough didn't even begin describe how freaking lucky she was to… "Eww, Derek," she hissed into the air.

The toilet seat was up again; which meant he'd been to damn lazy,again, to go downstairs.

She sighed and shrugged it off, pulling her shirt over her head. Derek detox could wait 'til later. Right now she wanted nothing but hot water and soap.

**

Casey's average day was far from normal. So far in fact, that she couldn't even see normal through a Hubble telescope. Consequentially, normal activities became for her like a vacation into an eerie, unfamiliar, yet oddly relaxing world.

Grocery shopping was one of her favorite misadventures. She could be efficient, productive, and organized--three of her most favorite things--all while being normal. Well, while trying to be anyway.

"Please tell me we're not gonna be here for five hours," Derek groaned, frowning at her at coupon file.

It was literally a file. Organized by category, discount, and expiration date. Casey tucked it defensively to her chest, scowling at him. "No one made you tag along, Derek. And, you know I like to be…" She chose her next word carefully, "…thorough."

"More like obsessive compulsive. And, I had to come or else you'd fill up the house with all that nasty, green stuff again."

"You mean lettuce and healthy vegetables?" Casey asked, raising her brow.

"Exactly."

Casey stared blankly at him, watching as he cut in front of another guy for a cart, like a caveman fighting over food, and brought it back to her, all smug like. "You gotta know how to work the system."

"Right," she said sarcastically. "Thank _god _you're here with me."

"S'no problem," he mumbled, completely missing her tone.

Casey rolled her eyes and grabbed the cart handle, pulling it towards herself.

"Unh uh," she said, "You get to drive, I get to push the cart."

"How very feminist of you."

He lifted his hands, assenting, and she took it slowly from him, but with a frown. That had sounded rather pre-historic. She shrugged it off and marched forward, rationalizing, "You always try to speed through the place like we're on the highway. Then you whine and moan, all '_we forgot something, Case_.'"

"I do not whine. Men do not whine. They complain…mannishly."

"That is one of the stupidest man things I've ever heard you say."

He smirked, like he was actually proud of himself or something, and Casey shook her head, before parking the cart and herself by the bread aisle.

"Let's see," she mumbled, opening her file, "Maybe I'll start with meats, or, oh wait, there's a sale on cereal…"

She felt Derek tap her shoulder, distracting her, and she glared at him. "Derek, I'm working here."

"I know, but…" He titled his head to the right and she followed his gaze across the store. Either he was really excited about the milk sale--which, _oh, goody_, she was--or he was gesturing to the tall, lanky male standing by the display. Casey squinted, and was surprised to see him smile coyly at her, before ducking his head, and looking back at the milk.

"Um, awhatnow?" Casey asked Derek.

"He's interested," Derek said plainly, "I can tell. I use the same fake shy look when I'm trying to score."

She rolled her eyes. "We'll talk about how grimy that is when we get home; but, why are you suddenly Suzy Matchmaker? Do I really seem that desperate?"

"Yes."

"Hello, Shame and Humiliation," she said, holding out her hand as if greeting invisible acquaintances, "Nice to meet you, I'm Casey."

Derek hissed at her, smacking her hand down, and glancing back at the shopper. "Would you stop it? He's gonna think you're nutso."

"I am nutso," she mumbled, officially disengaging and going back to her coupons, "Better he figure that out now, than get all excited and freak out later."

"Fine." He gave her back a soft shove forward. "Then go do that cutesy, awkward, Casey thing you do and work it."

"Are you trying to pimp me?"

"Again, _yes._"

Casey glowered at him, now sincerely agitated as she pushed the cart forward. She kept moving, secretly hoping he'd trip and fall into a black hole or something, and leave her alone.

"What are you doing?" She heard Derek ask behind her (apparently it had taken him a few moments to register her escape).

"Running away," she said dryly, "Please act accordingly, and don't follow."

Derek huffed, and rolled his eyes, his pace speeding up to a jog so he could catch up with her. She scrunched her nose at him, and he sighed. ""I was just trying to help."

"I don't need 'help', okay? I can get a date if I want to."

"Oh, really?"

"Really. Men are easy."

"Funny, I was thinking the same thing about women."

"No, _girls_ are easy," Casey said, her hands gesturing as if to distinguish, "Not women. After a while, the more sophisticated ones grow up and mature. Boys and men on the other hand... are always the same."

Derek quirked his brows, bemused, and she could tell she'd earned his attention.

"I could walk over to pretend shy guy right now…look confused, drop a few coupons, bend over and pick them up with batting eyelashes, and I'd have his number in .99 seconds."

"Someone's modest," Derek said with a smirk

Casey waived her hand dismissively. "Getting guys is not the challenge. Getting good guys on the other hand…? Near impossible. They might even be a myth."

"Well, I've never been called a mythical creature before," Derek said wryly.

"Meh, you don't count."

Her voice was tired, almost bitter as she pushed the cart along the aisle. Derek, meanwhile, squinted, and then the dance continued as he sped up again, catching her. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"You, Derek,are a diamond in the rough. Found, polished, and refined thanks in large part to Emily and the MacDonald women; namely moi."

Derek rolled his eyes, his whole body shifting with indignation.

"And, the worst part? I won't even get the fruit of it. Some random blonde chick who likes hockey and has a decently substantial personality will scoop you up, and I'll be the ugly, wicked stepsister left all alone."

"You're not ugly," he said instantly, "You're, ya know…" His eyes skimmed over her awkwardly, like he was looking at her, but trying really hard to _not_ look at her as well, "You're not, you uh…very nice…"

"Okay, Mo Mo, stop before you pull something. Your noble gesture's duly noted, but, don't worry, I don't have that severe of a body image issue. I was just using hyperbole."

"Hyperbole? Is that like an expensive shampoo, or something?"

"Ugh, never mind."

The cart moved again, and again, Derek followed.

"And, you don't have to be lonely, you know; that's a choice."

"I'm not lonely. Hyperbole, look it up."

And, honestly, she wasn't. Probably for the first time she'd been single, she didn't feel alone. She worked all the time at a job that, although slightly demoralizing, she was passionate about. She had friends there, people who respected her. And, Derek…well, she wasn't about to go ahead and write a poem about him , but he was pretty damn swell to have around.

But, as usual in matters even remotely emotional, Derek couldn't comprehend.

"Really? Is your boyfriend invisible then? Did I miss him? Oh, god, is he here right now?"

He looked around in mock hysterics, and Casey glared at him.

"Well, I don't see you dating either, 'Romeo.'"

"That's different. I've taken a vow of celibacy sense the Wicked Witch of the North."

She stiffened. "Ugh, that _bitch._"

His eyes widened and she blushed sheepishly. She didn't usually use that word, but that woman had _really _gotten under her skin. And, then crawled all over and hatched bitchy little eggs there.(Breaking Derek's heart into a thousand neat pieces didn't help either.)

"Glad to see you gals resolved all your issues," Derek said dryly.

"Pfft." Casey bristled. "If there's any woman on the face of the planet that I'd slap in the face it's--oww!!"

She winched as a display sign slapped _her_ in the face.

Her cheek burned, a sting of both pain and embarrassment, and she fell back…straight into the solid plain of Derek's chest. He walked her forward, one hand on the cart, and the other on her side as he slipped them around the corner. God, she was happy he tried minimizing her public humiliation these days instead of the opposite.

"Could you like, not be spastic for one entire minute of your life?"

"I'm sorry," she whined, rubbing her cheek, "I can't feel it coming on or something; I can't just click 'cancel' and make it stop."

"Lucky for you, and my reputation, I don't think anybody saw you."

"Except you," she moaned like a five year old.

"Except me," Derek said with an eye roll, "Now, let's go."

**

The rest of the day was sucked up by more normal, if not substantially more tedious, chores. She took a few brief breaks to bother Derek, and to let him bother her, but for the most part he was buried in playbooks and she was buried in bills, mail, and busy work. So her free day wasn't so 'free' after all, and maybe Derek was _slightly _right about that whole 'no life' thing. But, she could be lot unhappier.

Casey walked into the kitchen, a duster tucked under her arm, and stared at the wall calendar. The cable guy was coming on Saturday, sometime between the hours of 12 pm and 12 am. She needed to get her oil changed. And…

"Oh, hey," she said to Derek, who she'd been respectively ignoring at the island.

He glanced up her, but his tired gaze left quickly, retreating back to his to notebook. "I'm working, Casey."

"I know," she said, her voice more than a little indignant. She understood he was busy, but she wasn't a fly, or a lonely dog, or something else that needed to be swatted away. "But, it's time to call my mom."

"Already?" he asked, squinting.

She shrugged. She was surprised, too. "It's been a month."

It was kind of corny--okay, so a lot corny--but one of George and Nora's conditions for letting them move into the old house was that they both call them at least once a month. Casey was sure to keep in contact with her mom all the time--who else was obligated by natural law to hear her vent? But, since they'd moved to California last year for George's new job, Nora was determined to force as many family time moments out of them as possible. Hence, the phone call blackmail.

"Ehhh…" Derek scrunched his face. "Can't we do it later?"

She set her hands on her hips, like she always did when he was acting especially childish. "Derek, we promised. And, if we put it off-"

"We'll never get to it, yadda yadda; I get it, Mom Jr."

Her nose scrunched. She really didn't like that name.

But, she shook it off and walked towards the kitchen counter, grabbed the phone, and then set it between her and Derek on the island. She dialed the number and hit 'Speaker.'

"I think George is still out of town," she mumbled, tapping her fingers on the tiles.

"Good," Derek said only half seriously, "He always tells bad jokes on the phone. Well, badder than usual anyway."

"Badder's not a word," Casey said instantly, almost unconsciously.

He rolled his eyes at her, mouth parting with a ready one-liner when the line clicked on.

"_Casey? Derek? Is that you?"_

"Hey, mom."

"Hey, Nora."

"_Oh, it's so good to hear from you two. How have you been?"_

"Well," Derek looked at Casey and shrugged, "Casey doesn't have a life so… maybe I should field this one…?"

"He's lying, mom," Casey said into the speaker, glaring at him, "I totally have a life."

"It's an invisible life," Derek said, "Like her invisible boyfriend. You can't seem 'em, but they're both there."

Casey smacked him so hard Nora could probably hear it in California. Then she hissed, "Mom, ask Derek how his knee's doing."

Now, it was his turn to scowl at her, mouth hanging open. 'Low blow' his eyes said. But, she merely smirked at him.

"_Derek_? _You are staying off of it, right? You're not actually playing hockey?"_

"Weellll, you know how it-"

"YES," Casey blurted, "I caught him trying to sneak out to play with the guys today."

"Fine, yes," Derek said wryly, "Officer Spacey accosted me in the kitchen this morning, during her usual snoop patrol."

"I do not snoop."

"Please, you ooze snoop."

"You can't ooze snoop; that's nonsensical."

"Your face is nonsensical."

"Ugh, that's even _more _nonsensical."

Soft, muffled laughter wafted from the speaker, breaking up Casey's and Derek's bickering fest.

"_I swear, the more things change….Anyway, I'm glad you guys are getting along. I can always tell by your tone if you're really angry with each other or not." _There was a pause and some shuffling, and then..._"How's the house_?"

"The same as it was the last ten thousands times you asked, Nora," Derek said dryly, "We're not going to destroy it, don't worry."

"We might throw a party though," Casey said, elbows pressing to the island as she grinned at Derek.

Nora laughed. "_Oh, the party. What 'precious' memories. Though I suppose as much as George and I went out of town, it was pretty commendable that you only threw one."_

Casey swallowed a giggle, and lifted up three digits to Derek.

Derek smirked at her, his own eyes lit, as he lifted up four.

"Four?" she whispered, "No way."

"Yes, way," he whispered back, "I'll catch you up later."

"_Don't forget to change the filters. And, to sweep out the attic and-"_

"Nora," Derek said with a soft smile, "You do realize you're speaking to your daughter here? She cleans as a hobby."

"And, once, as a competitive sport," said Casey pointedly.

Derek chuckled and the sound matched Nora's laughter on the line.

"_Right, who could forget:_ _You and Sheldon your junior year."_

"That was one of the most bizarrely fascinating things I've ever witnessed," Derek said.

"And, I totally kicked his ass," Casey said, shoulders swaying with more than a little satisfaction, "I mean, yeah, it was a little tight by the time we reached the living room, but I dusted the hell out of that dinner table."

"Well, to be fair," Derek said, leaning over and mirroring Casey's position on the island, "You did literally have home field advantage."

"True, but--but," she said again with emphasis, "I gave him a four minute head start."

"Four minutes and four seconds." Derek's voice lowered gently, and their shoulders brushed as they unconsciously leaned towards each other, "I remember because you like…calculated it or something. By the number of rooms, surfaces and-"

"Difficultly level," she finished for him.

"Right."

He chuckled again; but then another irresistible grin captured his mouth, and hers, too, as she stared back at him.

"_Oh, oh, I think that's Marti calling_," Casey heard Nora say, suddenly snapping back into reality, where there were more than two people involved in this conversation, "_I should get this. It might be about her plane flight."_

"Alright, but tell little Miss Smarti Pants that she's owes her big bro a phone call," Derek said.

"_You could always call her, too, you know_," Nora said amusedly.

"Yeah, but that would ruin my whole busy, important, big brother vibe. So tell her to call me, but don't tell her-"

"_You asked. Got it….I love you both, so don't be strangers, okay?"_

"Okay, Mom."

"Sure thing, Nora."

"Love you, Mom," Casey said back right before the phone clicked off.

Casey clicked the 'End' button and sighed. Talking with her mom had been great, but she felt suddenly smothered with fatigue, like it had been slowly, secretly sneaking up on her. She moaned and let her arms and shoulders nest atop the island.

"Past your bedtime?" Derek asked softlly.

She yawned, long and drawn out. "Mmmmhmm."

"I could carry you again," he said jokingly, "Maybe by your ponytail."

She rolled her eyes at him, but he kept smiling, even as he reached up to gently, but firmly pull at her hair tie, freeing a wave of dark locks. Casey shook the mane of her hair, like she was shaking off the day, and looked at him through wild strands.

"Speaking of hair; you should cut yours."

She reached for his messy locks then, too, her palm and soft fingers smoothing them down. Derek's eyes fluttered slightly, and she knew he liked that, but she always had to trick him into any physical displays of affection. He didn't know he needed them and would revolt if he sensed one coming.

"I like it long," he mumbled, sleep creeping into his own voice.

"I like it long, too. But, it's not very professional. And, you have to look all responsible and grown-up-like for the parents."

"I don't wanna grow up; I'm a Toys R Us Kid."

He yawned, and his head dipped a little, his eyes drooping. Casey's lips quirked. "Maybe I should carry _you_ up the stairs."

"By my ponytail?"

"By your ponytail," she said, her fingernails scraping gently at the scruff over the nape of his neck.

"Hey, stop that, it tickles," he mumbled, moving away.

She rolled her eyes, and took her hand back, saying teasingly, "Oh, sorry, I forgot. Girls have cooties."

"You're not a girl, you're a woman, remember?" There was sleep all over his voice now, almost pulling him into a slur. Casey furrowed her eyebrows, trying to follow his thoughts; and, as usual, failing. "And, ya know, cooties are serious, Casey. Cooties kill. Did you know that every five seconds an innocent, unsuspecting man dies of cooties?"

She leaned towards him, like she was sharing a secret. "Did you know that every two seconds…"

Smack.

Right upside his head.

He blinked. "You are meanest kid doctor I've ever met."

**

Somehow, against all odds, they managed to drag their tired bodies up the steps. Casey had been so busy being 'free' she'd forgotten to really rest, and Derek, well…she knew he couldn't have gotten much sleep since he'd been on the road all night. Not to mention he'd been up before her. Which was definitely a rarity.

They took a few more steps together and then paused sleepily by their adjacent doors.

"You know," Casey said before he could open his, "Sometimes I'm absolutely terrified of going to bed."

Derek leaned his shoulder against his door and watched her, lips quirking slightly. "Because of the bed gremlins?"

"Also, because of the bed gremlins," she said, tilting her head in playful concession, "But, mostly because I know that as soon I get a taste of that sweet, sweet sleep, boom--my alarm clock goes off." She frowned. "I freaking hate that alarm clock. I wanna murder that alarm clock."

"You should strangle it. With your bare hands."

"Eh, yeah, but that's how I was planning on murdering you." She shrugged, sending him a cutesy side glance, "And, I wouldn't want it to be passe."

"Naturally." He ducked his head, chuckling. "You could, uh, push it out a window; make it look like an accident?"

"Yeah, but then my prints would still be all over it," she said with fake frustration.

"You could wear gloves."

"And poke it with a stick."

"A long stick. Edge it out the window."

"No witnesses."

"I could be your alibi."

"Meh, I walk this bitter road of crime alone."

She smiled then, and chewed at her bottom lip as they stood there, quiet.

She was tired and desperately wanted to sleep. But, then there was this part of her that didn't want the night to end, wanted to cling to the respite of a lazy day with lazy laughs and lazy smiles.

"Thanks," she whispered softly, without even really thinking about it, "For today. For coming back early, even if I know you'd never own up to it because you're emotionally defective. I had a lot of…Derek?"

Her eyes had casually trailed back to him, finding him suddenly slumbering, his cheek pressed softly to his door, his eyes gently shut.

She rolled her eyes. "Typical."

**


	3. Chapter 3

**Aww, thanks so much for the feedback, guys; it always makes my day :)**

**Here's the next part . It's a little longer than the other parts, but there's also some solo Casey time, so I figured it all evens out. As, always, let me know what you think.. **

**P.S. I know zilch about medicine, so please excuse any errors.  
**

******

**And so it all Begins, Part 2**

**

_God, this morning sucks._

Shrieking alarm clock, shrieking headache, shrieking muscles as she tossed in her bed. It had been a damn awful night of sleep. It was like her bed had been angry at her or something, like she couldn't find a single comfortable spot on her mattress.

"_Ugggghh."_

She reached, eyes squinted, to slam the snooze button for the third time that morning, when she felt a warm hand cover hers, and then slip the clock from her grasp.

"You gotta wake up, Case," she heard Derek murmur from beside the bed.

"Mmmm, I donwanna."

She moaned and turned over in her bed, her back facing him defiantly, when he said, "It's 8 o'clock."

"Awhatnow!" She jerked up, like she'd been electrocuted and tore the covers off her body. "Oh my god, are you serious, I'm late?!"

"No."

"Drew is going to kill me, and I have rounds and---what'd you say?"

"I said no," Derek answered, smirking as she stared at him. She was already out of bed, reaching for clothes, before his words had caught up with her. "It's 7 o'clock. I lied so you'd get up."

She watched him, eyes narrowing, for a long, silent moment. "I think I'm mad at you. But, I'm tired and I need a shower; so I'll deal with it later." She scowled and grabbed her robe from her dresser, "Why are you even up so early?"

He smiled, an excited quirk of his lips. "Big day today."

"Oh, right, _right," _Casey said, her eyes brightening with realization, "I totally spaced. Your interview with the college."

Derek had been going on and on about the interview for a few weeks now. He already had a pretty sweet job coaching an elite, youth hockey league, but his dream had always been to work his way up to the college level. It was the closest he'd get back to pro hockey (his knee had given out on him after a brief stint in the minors). Last month, he'd gotten a phone call from Benson, a small, local college about an opening. Derek had tried to play it cool, but the closer he got to the interview, the less he could hide how jazzed he was.

"Yeah, well you've been gone a lot, so you know…" he trailed off, following her as she headed into the hallway and towards the bathroom, "But, it's today: 11 am."

"You nervous?" Casey asked, folding the robe to her chest and standing in the bathroom doorway with him.

"Ehhh, a little bit…kind of…sort of a lot."

She smiled, but it was sweet, kind. "You'll nail it; I just know it."

"Well-"

"But, I have to shower and get going so I don't get fired and have to leach off you and your new spiffy, job, 'kay? 'Kay."

She grinned, big, bright, and hopefully encouraging, before closing the door.

****

Okay, she was almost set. She was clean, her teeth were brushed, her hair was _moderately_ in place. All she had to do was grab a drink and-

"_CASEY."_

She sighed. She knew that voice, that whiny tinge. He needed something. Casey set her purse on the counter, and headed back to stairs, jogging up the steps.

"Yeah, D?"

He came out into the hallway, clothed in nothing but a tie, boxers, and a sheepish expression. "I uh…"

"Got it," she said over him, brushing past him and sprinting into his room.

Derek quirked a brow and stood motionless for a second, before slowly following after her. She was going through his closet, hands quickly, efficiently pushing back shirts and slacks.

"Okay," she said, after a moment, "….this shirt. And, these pants. And, this tie. Gotta go, good luck-"

"Woah, woah; I wasn't asking you to give me a makeover," he said, " I just wanted help with the shirt."

"I know what you want; but, even better, I know what you need. And, you need to match when you meet with grownups."

She scurried out of the room, a flustered Derek standing awkwardly before the mirror, only to return a few beats later.

"And, make sure you shave. And, comb your hair back since it's getting long. And, don't use that funky aftershave. You'll do great, bye."

She scurried back out and this time Derek followed behind until the doorway.

"Hey, uh, should…I expect anyone to cook dinner tonight after I nail this, or order out?"

"Order out…!" she cried from the bottom of the steps.

He frowned. She couldn't see it, but she could hear it in his voice. "Oh."

"…for two; I'll be too spent to cook tonight!"

"Oh," he said again. This time, less frowning.

***

"Woah, is Captain Casey actually running late?"

Casey rolled her eyes and pulled open her locker, shoving her purse inside and ignoring the smirking male on the bench behind her. Teddy was, well…her thoughts about him changed depending on the day. On good days, he was the funny, quirky guy who made everyone laugh and lightened up her day. On bad days, which was pretty much every other day, he was annoying, juvenile, and liked to test her nerves. It was like Derek circa high school.

"Hilarious," she said to him dryly, "And I'm not late. Not yet. I'm just pushing it a little close."

"Better watch out," he said, slipping on sneakers, "Or people might find out you're not actually perfect. Gasp."

"I don't know, look's pretty perfect from where I'm standing," came another male voice, three lockers down.

She sighed and pulled her hair back into a quick, sloppy ponytail, scowling straight ahead at her locker. "For the last time, I'm not sleeping with you, Dan; get over it."

"We could take it slow," he said, leaning smoothly against the locker, "You know, maybe start off with a friendly, polite French kiss--oww!"

"You're a walking, talking, sexual harassment suit," muttered Kellie, the owner of the hand that had so solidly whopped him.

"You called me sexual," Dan said after her.

"I'm gonna call a lawyer if you don't quit it."

Casey and Kellie rolled their eyes in sync, and then turned together out of the locker room. Kellie was her closest friend at work, and--considering she had no life outside of work--her best friend period. Casey hadn't liked her at first: she was blonde, and tall, and skinny, and spelled her name with an "ie".But she'd been surprised to find there was a lot more going on underneath the typical Barbie doll exterior. After they'd shared a series of mortifying experiences together their first week (read: toddler projectile vomit), they'd bonded and remained close. Secretly she thought of her as Emily 2.0 (not that she and Emily didn't still talk occasionally) because she put up with Casey's not-so-infrequent spazzouts and dorkiness.

"We thought you were actually gonna be late today," Kellie mumbled, leaning with her against a railing. It was their usual stop, where the residents waited before Dr. Drew, (or Dr. Doom as they all referred to him) showed up with instructions.

"We?" Casey asked.

"Yeah, you know, me Dan, Mel, Brody, and the janitor. We placed bets; we'd never seen it happen."

Casey snorted. "Wow, and I thought my life was lame."

"It still is," Kellie chirped, "But you're in good company."

Casey felt the back of her pants buzz, and then frowned before slipping out her cell phone.

"Ooooh, more hot text messages from your secret lover, Juan Pablo?" Kellie asked, leaning over to peak as Casey flipped it open. For the life her, Casey couldn't figure out why Kellie had made up this fictional lover for her. She'd long given up on trying to figure out how her mind worked, though.

"Please. This is real life, not General Hospital; it's just Derek."

"Well, that's still pretty hot," Kellie said playfully.

"Eww," Casey said, and she made a big show about expressing how disgusting that was, "Would you stop it with that? He's my stepbrother."

"He's your hot stepbrother," Kellie said, pushing herself up so she was sitting on the railing, "I'm just saying, besides his hockey obsession, those bad jokes, and that horrible hair, he's pretty cute."

"Derek does not have horrible hair," Casey said instantly, without thinking. Off Kellie's arched brow, she rolled her eyes, "You know that's not how I meant it. Could you just go somewhere and live out your sicko Brady Bunch fantasies elsewhere?"

Kellie rolled her eyes, "So uptight sometimes."

"Of course I'm uptight; I'm Casey."

She pressed a few more buttons, explaining as clearly in text lingo as possible why he couldn't wear his brown coat with his black slacks and pressed "send."

"Ugh," Casey sighed, "I swear. Living with him is like living with a two year old sometimes."

"Please, you think that's bad? At least he has basic fashion sense. My brother can't even use a tie."

"Well, trust me; Derek can't-"

Her phone went off again, and she rolled her eyes, ready to text back something not-so-friendly, when the message blinked on the screen: _"Raymonds. 8pm. Wear something not grimy._"

A smile tugged at her lips. Okay, that was substantially less aggravating. She couldn't remember the last time she'd had a nice meal out, or dressed up. Maybe Derek's interview had some perks after all.

"_I'll try my best," _she texted back.

"Hope I'm not distracting you."

Both girls straightened and instantly, almost magically, a smattering of other residents joined the girls, as Dr. Drew approached. He peered down at Casey through black reading glasses, glancing between her and the chart.

"Uh, um, oh, sorry, Dr. Drew," she said sputtered, tucking the phone back into her pants.

He stared at her for a moment before saying, "McDowell."

"McDonald," Dan corrected.

Casey elbowed him and blurted, "Or-or McDowell. Either's fine."

"Riiight," Dr. Drew muttered, checking something off, "I want you to take some of the interns around today. Console them, coddle them, use all your awkward, peppy, people skills, and trick them into thinking medicine's enjoyable for the day….before hell starts next week."

"Oh," she frowned, "Okay."

"Martin," he said to Kellie, "You're with Shrubber today."

"Sweet," Kellie stage whispered.

"Brody, McMillan. Rooney,Steinmetz. Jacobs…"

Casey tuned him out and tried to keep the frown from taking her lips. She sighed. Another fun, mind sucking day at work.

***

_Oh_, how she wanted to be home right now.

Curled up in a bed with ice cream and a novel. Or, better, yet, she could skip the ice cream and the book, and just go straight to the sweet, sexy sleep.

She sighed and yanked the clip from her hair; at least she was getting a free meal. And, if Derek had nailed the interview--which she was sure he had; he was more than qualified and quite the charmer--it would be really nice to see him all jazzed and happy.

She walked towards the lockers, quicker now and with a little more pep, until she turned the corner and ran into, "Dr. Doom-Drew, _Drew_; so sorry," she blurted.

Dr. Drew cocked a questioning eyebrow at her, tucking his clipboard under his arm. "McDowell," he greeted dryly, "How were the infants?" Infants were his term for interns.

"Um, not too bad," Casey said, awkwardly, "They seemed really excited, asked a lot of questions, and _most _of them didn't cry."

She grinned stiffly, and Dr. Drew smiled back. Almost.

"Gotta new case open," he said plainly, "11 year old female, presenting with episodes of labored breathing and accelerated heart rate. You interested?"

"Heck yeah! I mean; I mean, not about her heart, or anything, but-"

Dr. Drew nodded slowly, cutting her off. "Just meet me in room C in ten minutes."

"Oh, so, so we'd like start now?"

"Or we could postpone; leave her family in the dark until it's more conveinet for _you_, of course."

He did that fake, unfunny smile thing again, before titling his head and turning the corner. She waited a full 30 seconds before squeaking, jumping on her feet and twirling a few times for good measure. She was so caught up she didn't even realize there were others turning with her until she'd stopped.

"What are we spinning for?" Teddy asked, grinning, as he and Kellie bounced around.

"Dr. Doom just totally asked me to work with him!"

"No ways!" Kellie cried.

"Yes ways!"

"No ways!"

"Yes ways! Ahh, this is awesome, I gotta text Der…ek," she trailed off, face falling as her hand paused over her back pocket.

"What's the holdup?" Kellie asked, frowning.

"Well, I sort of promised him we'd do dinner tonight, celebrate his new job opportunity and what not."

Teddy waved his hand carelessly. "Pfft; ditch him."

"Teddy," Casey hissed.

Kellie rolled her eyes and pushed the disgruntled male aside, slipping down the hallway with Casey. "Ignore him," she said, "Except for the part where he's right."

"Teddy? Right?"

"For once. But, for real, Derek, won't care; he's Derek. He'll probably go out and get wasted with his guys and French some random chick instead."

Casey's nose twisted at the image, and she pulled out her phone, considering. "I dunno; he seemed pretty excited earlier. I don't want to miss his big day."

"Casey, Derek is a big boy. He'll be fine. Besides, it's not like you're a stay at home stepsis or something; you have your own career to think about. I mean seriously, Dr. Drew like never, ever, ever picks out new residents unless he really sees potential….

"I know, but…"

"And, seriously, when's the last time Derek's ever stopped by to support you at work, or even asked you about it without being all snarky? You on the other hand, are like the never ending cheerleader for everything he does. It's time you did something for you. It's not selfish, it's just fair."

"This from the woman who'd sell her mother for a fellowship," Casey replied dryly.

"Hey, don't hate the player; hate the game."

Casey rolled her eyes, and looked away, flipping open the phone.

"So?" Kellie asked after a moment, "What's it gonna be?"

****

Casey pushed open the front door with a heavy amount of joy and a heavy amount guilt. Shadowing Dr. Drew had been awesome, especially compared to the tedious, mind numbing babysitting tasks she'd had early that day. Drew hadn't said anything kind to her, or encouraged her, or given her any real feedback--as per usual. But, he invited her to assist him again tomorrow, which as far she was concerned, was, oh, just the _best thing ever._

But, then there'd been the whole canceling on Derek thing. He hadn't seemed all that upset about it, actually. Just like Kellie had said. But, she was Casey, and she kind of thrived on being a part of sentimental, overtop moments like this.

Plus, with Derek, she could never really know for sure what was going on inside his head. He wasn't exactly one to wear his emotions on his sleeve, or often anywhere discernible at all.

She closed the door behind her, kicked off her shoes, and was surprised to find Derek there, quiet, alone in the living room.

He was sitting on his recliner, sports coat tossed on the arm chair, his hair ruffled, sleeves rolled up to his elbows. He looked to her at that moment, strangely handsome, rustic. It made sense. Derek was never at home at either extreme of the fashion spectrum: too business or too casual. He was made for something in between. She tucked the thought away, and sighed, moving out of the foyer.

"Hey," she said quietly, testing the waters.

He glanced up at her, somewhat apathetically, before looking back to the hockey game.

"I'm really, _really_ sorry I had to rain check," she said, " 'Dr. Doom' finally let me work with him today. Couldn't turn down my shot at that glorious pit of hell you, know?"

Derek shrugged, eyes still stuck on the screen. "S'no problem. Hung out with the guys. Some girl hit on me."

Just like Kellie said. But, he didn't seem all that happy, or even remotely excited. Casey frowned and walked over to him, letting her bag drop quietly beside the recliner. He glanced at her, only briefly, and she brushed his hair back, her fingers threading through the familiar, soft locks.

"Stop it," he muttered almost instantly.

"I thought you liked that?" she whispered.

He ignored her, which apparently had been his point all along, and Casey sighed, stepping back.

"Well, are you at least gonna tell me how it went?"

"S'no big deal."

"Derek," she said, exasperated, "Of course it's a big deal. It's all you've been talking about for like the last…ever."

"You're tired," he said quietly, his voice distant and his eyes steady on the game, "You should go to sleep."

"I don't want to go to sleep," Casey said, which was a lie and not a lie at the same time. "I want you to stop zoning me out and tell me about your interview."

When Derek answered her with silence, his jaw twitching slightly, but no other part of him acknowledging her; Casey huffed, marched over to him and snatched away the remote, clicking "off."

"Hey!"

Casey tossed it a few feet to her right and walked over the chair, standing over him. "What are you, a girl now? You're gonna give me the silent treatment?"

He rolled his eyes, a tired hand rubbing his head. "What are you even talking about?"

"I said I was sorry," Casey cried, " It's not like I blew you off for an ice cream cone, or something. I had work."

"So you admit you blew me off then?"

He looked her at then, really looked at for the first time since she'd entered, and his eyes were suddenly cold, petulant, and hard. She felt a rush of indignation sweep over her.

"Okay, you know what?" she said, moving for the steps, "This has officially ceased to be an _adult_ conversation. You are the biggest baby I have ever met."

"I'm the baby…?" Derek called back to her, still in his recliner, but now ramrod straight, "I'm not the one throwing a hissy fit because I won't 'play dollhouse' with you or whatever else attention you want right now."

"Ugh!"

"And, you're _tired_, so just go to sleep."

His eyes were soft around the edges, although still hard in the middle, a weird mix of emotion as he looked back at her. Casey didn't know how to comprehend that so she answered with a huff and stormed up the stairs.

***

Casey was halfway done flossing, and pretending she wasn't agitated as hell when the bathroom door creaked open.

"Hey," he said quietly, his voice full of reluctance and something else.

She ignored him.

She didn't want him to leave, and damnit, he was right, she had wanted his attention, wanted to tell him about her more than slightly awesome day--but she wasn't about to beg him for it.

"Does this look like a movie to you?" she snapped instead.

He straightened, and his face flashed with irritation in the door way. He looked like he might storm off. But, he planted himself there.

"I was just gonna ask how your day was," he said tightly. He folded his arms over his chest, like he was shielding himself from something, and mumbled, "You know, your whole…research thing."

"Ugh," she huffed and slammed the floss container down, glaring at him, "Would stop trying to be all fake sweet, I'm mad at you right now."

"You're mad at _me_?" he said, his eyes wide and incredulous, "I had one of the biggest interview opportunities of my career today, and you ditched me at the last minute to follow around some asshole who treats you like crap for an hour."

Her cheeks heated; hurt, guilty. "That's not fair."

"No, you're not fair. That was my hour; that was my time."

"No, it was _my time_, Derek, literally, the time that belonged to me." He bristled and her eyes narrowed. "I mean seriously, you can't rent me or something, like a car. I told you I would try my best to make it. And, I did; but it was sort of a once in a lifetime thing."

"Right. I'm sure you _really_ agonized for all of 1 second over whether to cancel or not."

"I did."

"Whatever."

"And, when's the last time you stopped by my work?" she asked him, and yeah she was more than a little annoyed that Kellie's words had stuck in her brain. "Or even asked about it without me pulling your teeth?"

"I'm asking you right now, aren't I?"

"Pfft. You don't care."

He just stood there, and she waited for him; waited for him to say something back so they could keep this going. But, he didn't.

"This is the part where you say you care."

He shook his head, turning away. "No, this is part where I'm tired, I'm going to have some beer, and go to bed. See you tomorrow, or next week, or whenever you decide to grace me with your presence."

The door shut. Hard. Her face crumpled, but she wasn't going to admit it. She refused to admit that it _really_ upset her they were fighting. They were Casey and Derek: they fought; that wasn't exactly news worthy. But, they hadn't had a real fight, a real, emotions caught up, hurting her feelings fight in…she couldn't even really remember. Definitely not since they'd moved in together.

He'd seemed pretty hurt, too. Not that Derek would come out and say it, write it, text it, or leave any traceable evidence, but she could read it in him. His closed off, defensive eyes. The slump of his shoulders. The downward tilt of his lips.

She wanted to hit him and make him hug her so badly at the same time.

She sighed, and turned back to the mirror, fell back thoughtlessly into her nightly routine.

On his door before he went to sleep she'd leave a note, because she'd probably be long gone before he even woke up: _Raymonds. 7pm. Wear something not grimy._

***

_This is stupid_, Casey thought glumly.

There she was, cramped up awkwardly in the front seat, half her body inside the car, and the other half balancing outside the car as she tried to get these ridiculous strappy heels on and he hadn't called, texted her, anything.

He wasn't going to show.

Derek wouldn't admit it, but he could be the biggest girl in the world when it came to these sort of things. Especially if he felt even the slightest bit vulner-

"Casey?"

She glanced up from her strap and there was Derek, looking more than a little confused, almost like he wasn't sure it was her.

She squinted and then followed his gaze to her dress, her curled hair, her heels. She couldn't remember the last time he'd seen her done up, and apparently neither could he, judging by his wide eyed expression.

"Hey," he said slowly, drawn out as he came closer.

He opened the car door further her, so she wasn't quite as squashed in the driver's seat, and watched her from the other side of the door.

"Hey," she said back after a long silence. She yanked once more, finally forcing up the strap, and stood awkwardly and gracelessly on the other side of the door. Derek's brow line was still lifted up on his forehead, and she blurted again, "Hey… I'm uh, sort of surprised you're here."

"Yeah," he shrugged, one hand still resting on the door, "Me, too."

She nodded, wringing her hands together. "Yeah."

An uncharacteristic silence sat between them, Casey chewing at her bottom lip, and Derek standing there with that stupid, typical blank stare.

"Yeah, so let's uh, go in and talk, or whatever, okay?"

She slipped her purse over her shoulder, and started walking to restaurant, hoping the awkwardness wouldn't follow, but would stay back at the car instead. But, she didn't hear Derek behind her, or the click of the car door, so she turned back, watching him expectantly.

He just shook his head. "I don't wanna do this."

"Do what?"

Damn, that had sounded a lot more whinny than she would have liked. But, she really wanted him to move from the stupid car, and come into the stupid restaurant with her, and just stop this stupid fighting.

"This talky, emotional, you know..._stuff_."

She squinted.

"I don't want to talk about feelings," He said, "How you feel, or I feel, or me being more sensitive, or anything girly like that."

She sighed, a long, relieved breath. Was that all he'd meant? He could have skipped all the cryptic babbling and just said, "Hi, I'm Derek," which was virtually synonymous with everything he'd just said.

"Are those all your terms?"

"Yes," he said firmly, but with a slight glint to his eyes.

"Fine."

"And, I pay."

She quirked her brow, watching confusedly as he shut the car door. "Not that I'm complaining or anything, but awhatnow?"

"I'm renting you," he said with a smirk, "Just to be safe."

***

"Is it sad that this is the closest thing I've had to a date in months?"

"Yes," Derek said instantly. "Even sadder is this is the nicest you've looked in months," he mumbled into his menu.

Casey squinted. She could only see his forehead, so she couldn't really tell whether he was joking, or serious, or both; and further, she couldn't decide whether to be insulted or flattered, or both. Him and his stupid obtuseness.

"Um, thanks?" she said finally, brows furrowed.

"S'no problem."

Still only could see his forehead, so she dropped it. She was skimming her own menu, deciding between a salad and three cheese pasta (what she really wanted), when she heard him say:

"Date's are overrated anyway."

She looked up from her menu and could see his entire face now. "That's a sentence I never thought I'd hear you say."

"Meh, well, you know, the whole vow of celibacy thing."

They'd started the monastic vow shtick several months ago as a joke. Casey because she'd been in and out of a string of horrific relationships, and Derek because of his not so happy ending with Rebecca--or the Wicked Witch of the North as they both referred to her. She'd been pretty sure they were both kidding when they'd said it--she knew she'd been at least--but, as the weeks rolled by and turned into seasons, it seemed like less of a joke and more of a reality.

Personally, she barely had enough time to look "nice", as Derek had just so eloquently put it, let alone put on airs for some guy, who in the end would probably end up being a dud anyway. She wasn't so sure about Derek. He had plenty of time--well, at least compared to someone in residency--if he really wanted to meet someone. She'd thought he'd slowly gotten over Rebecca, but maybe…

No, she promised him there would be no talking about "feelings" tonight, so she shelved the thought for later. Instead, she focused on the lighter, more obvious comment:

"So, what? Since you're swearing off sex, you just…have no need for female interaction?"

"Pretty much," he said, nodding. She rolled her eyes at him and he continued, "What? I mean seriously, what else is there to women besides talking and emotions and nagging? I already get those little 'bundles of joy' from you and they're, guess what, annoying."

Her face pinched up with aggravation. "Hey."

"It's nothing personal," he said, "It's all women, you know, universally."

She wanted to smack him, Yet, she also wanted to laugh. Because only Derek could say things like that to her, all straight faced and sincere, and not in the slightest bit realizing how sexist and insensitive it was.

"So let me get this straight," she said, leaning forward on her forearms, "You have absolutely, positively, zilcho desire to have a girl friend; a girl that's a friend?"

He was silent, his eyes flitting about the table as if considering, and then he shook his head. "Nope."

"That's ridiculous!"

"No, it's not. Men don't need women, not like women need men…"

"Oh, this should be good," she mumbled.

"What I mean is, girls _love _having guy friends, calling them, asking for advice, having them move things and junk. Guys on the other hand, pretty much only love sex from girls, which they can't get if they're in the friend zone."

"So women have nothing to offer men besides sex?"

"Exactly. Except…you know, moms and aunts and maids and stuff…and, I guess you, or whatever."

She stared at him for a full ten seconds, speechless.

"Do I even want to know what that means?"

"Well, you know. You're not my sister, not for reals for reals, like Marti. You're not a woman, like you know, like I could date, you know" He waved his hand dismissively, while Casey squinted at him, "…you know."

No…she really didn't. She really didn't get anything coming from his mouth lately.

"I think what they call that," she said slowly, carefully like he was a three year old, "Is a friend."

"Oh."

His face opened up, like he'd just solved a riddle or something, and Casey rolled her eyes.

"You are so challenged."

He looked at her for a moment, seemingly less confused, but his brows still furrowed. "So you think of me as a friend then?"

"Of course I think of you as a friend," she said to him, looking at him with exasperation, "You're like my big bro…" His eyebrows spiked, "Not like 'for reals'," she said, rolling her eyes and using air quotes, "But, yeah.."

"So, like Edwin?"

"No, not like Edwin. We're…you know, closer, or whatever…"

She scrunched her nose. Eww, when had she started sounding like Derek when she talked about relationships? Eww.

He snorted, and leaned back in the booth, folding his arms. "So am I a friend or a brother or a stepbrother or a unicorn, or what?"

"What? Why are we even talking about this?"

Okay, she was stalling, because she didn't really have an answer and this was confusing and she hated when Derek was all right about something and trying to make a point.

"Should I…come back?"

Oh, right, the waiter. The waiter who apparently had been standing awkwardly beside the booth for a while now. He looked at them sheepishly, matching Casey's blushing cheeks.

"I uh, wanted to give you give you time to decide, but…"

"Do you think a man and woman can be friends?" Derek blurted at him, and both Casey's and the waiter's eyes bugged.

The waiter sputtered. "Well, uh, I…do you want to start off with some water?"

"Let's try this another way," Derek said, ignoring Casey's warning look and leaning towards the helpless man, "Have you ever had a girl who was a friend…that you didn't want to score with?"

Okay, that was enough. Casey reached over and smacked his arm, silencing him. "Derek, would you leave him alone?"

"That--that would be nice, sir," the waiter croaked.

But, Derek ignored him, and turned back to Casey. "My only point is that we're not friends. We're…I don't know, acquaintances."

"Acquaintances?" Casey asked, voice almost screeching, "Are you delusional? Do you share a home with 'acquaintances'?" Or get sick and ask 'acquaintances' to go buy you Pepto-Bismol at three o' clock in the morning?"

"Alright, I'll uh, just check back in later," the waiter said, slipping away.

"Great. Now you scared away the waiter," Derek grumbled.

Casey just stared at him. She knew he wasn't the most emotionally in tune guy on the planet, but was he really _this_ dense?

"Are you sure you're still comfortable having a meal with me? You know, one on one like this; could be a little too personal for an 'acquaintance'?"

"Woah, woah, Space Case, calm down."

She hated when he told her to calm down. But, then again, maybe she was getting a little worked up. Her shoulders were tense, her face slightly flushed. It was stupid, but she felt really annoyed, really defensive about this whole thing. Seriously, what in the world did he even think of her as? A glorified maid or something?

She was staring down, frustrated at her menu when he leaned in and whispered, "Why are you so damn sensitive?"

"Why are you so damn insensitive?" she whispered back.

"Calm down," He said again, his hand grazing by her elbow. He only touched her like that when he was trying to diffuse her 'tantrums', as he called them, "I'm buying you a meal, aren't I? I'm gonna sit here and listen to you blab on about some doctor thing I can't even understand, aren't I?

"What do you want, a gold star?" she asked, glaring at him.

"I want you to not spazz out and ruin the evening. When I found out I nailed the interview you were the first person I wanted to tell."

He'd blurted it out, and she could tell by his face he hadn't particularly wanted to reveal that. But he kept his eyes on her--slightly sheepish, slightly vulnerable, and slightly annoyed--as she stared back at him.

Her eyes warmed, and then she felt her chest warm, too, a feeling he didn't usually make her feel, and she slid her arm away from him, glancing down.

"Oh," she mumbled.

Derek sounded annoyed, and huffed, leaning back. "You promised we weren't gonna talk about 'girly stuff'."

"You started it," she cried.

She didn't really look at him, though, not in the eye, because she was still trying to process what he'd just said. When Drew had let her work with him she'd been stoked, had basically sprinted home to tell Derek, too. But, she hadn't known it was something…mutual.

"So…" Derek asked, "You wanna eat, or sit here in awkward silence?"

**

"So when would you start?" Casey asked, stealing some food from Derek's plate. (She'd gone with the salad, which had made her feel good; but not full).

"Probably next year…" He said on a sigh, "The pay's obviously better. I'd get to travel more, I guess; maybe get a shot at better schools, or the minors."

He sounded like he was reading aloud from a recipe book: dull, steady, monotonous. Casey looked up from his disappearing veal and squinted at him.

"Woah, there, bud. Take it down a notch," she said sarcastically.

"Eh, well."

He shrugged slightly, and one more bite and she'd have eaten a third of his plate without him complaining. She frowned and set down her fork. "What's goin' on, Mo Mo?"

"Nothing," he said, his lips thinning, "I just…it's not…I dunno."

Casey read his gaze and sent him a knowing look, leaning forward. "See, _this_ is why you need a woman in your life: you don't think about how you feel unless it's hungry, horny, or angry."

"Don't forget sleepy," he deadpanned.

She lowered her voice and asked more gently, "What's going on with you? Why aren't you bouncing up and down?"

"I dunno," he said honestly, "I just…everything fits, but it just…I guess leaving the team at this point would…I uh…." He rubbed at his forehead, like he was struggling.

"Oh, my god," Casey cried, her eyes wide with realization as she studied him. Derek sent her a wary look. "You're totally growing attached to those kids, aren't you?"

"No, no, no," Derek said, "No more feelings talk!"

"Derek, that's a good thing. It's not all about money and fame and success."

"Pfft, yeah; it is."

"Really?" she asked, "Then why aren't you more jazzed?"

Derek groaned, letting his head fall helplessly to the table, "Uggh, I dunno."

Casey answered by tugging softly at his hair, tipping his head back up, and looking into his agonized face. "Derek; they're called emotions. Meet them, greet them, embrace them."

"If you really loved me, you'd make them go away," Derek whined melodramatically.

"Trust me," Casey said, reaching over to steal another piece of food, "It's for your own good."

***


	4. Chapter 4

**Aww, feedback makes me happy; probably TOO happy. Anyway, thanks again for your thoughtful comments. ;) Here's the next part…**

***

**Ch-ch-changes, Part 3**

***

Casey rarely made it home before Derek (and by 'rarely', she meant never). So it was only mildly surprising that, even on her early shift, Derek's car still beat hers to the garage. "Prince Jr. 1005, Prias 0," she muttered dryly.

She grabbed her purse in one hand, her giant coffee mug in the other, and in her third hand--that place up against a woman's chest that every busy woman learned to use--a stack of files. Work had been picking up, if that were even possible, and her new 'friendship' with Dr. Doom meant a lot of fascinating (and dense) research on the side. Unfortunately, Casey didn't have much 'side' left, so it was starting to cramp into her already over cramped routine.

She grunted as she used her fourth hand--the swing of her hip--and tried to jimmy open the doorknob. Due to much practice she was successful, and she stuttered backwards a few steps, before the door swung fully open behind her and she heard, "_Woah_. S'up babe?"

Casey's face heated an indignant shade of red, and she grumbled, "Okay, since when are you allowed to call--oh, uh hi?"

_That isn't Derek_, she thought confusedly as she turned to face the five foot nine, smirking male before her. He couldn't have been more than fourteen, she guessed, with scruffy red hair, a tilted baseball cap, and up-to-no-good green eyes. He looked oddly familiar.

"Hey," she said again, frowning. "Is this the right house?"

"Well, I hope so, if it means you live here."

"Riiight," she said slowly. She glanced at the teen only a moment longer, before scowling up the stairway, and crying out her usual, accusatory call, "Der-ek!"

"I'm here; I'm here" he said, jogging from near the kitchen instead. "You're home early," he said, instantly grabbing the files and the mug from her.

Casey nodded absently, still glancing between him and the mystery boy to their left. "Good day?" Derek asked.

"Yeah…_you?_" she asked with a pointed look.

Derek glanced up from where he'd set her mug and smiled sheepishly. "Oh, right, yeah. That's uh, Josh; you know, from the hockey team."

_Oh, that's why he looked so familiar._ Casey tried her best to make all of Derek's games, (even though her best hadn't meant a lot lately with all the work). So she'd seen most of the players, but always with hockey pads, and sticks, and helmets, and other things obscuring their faces.

"Oh," Casey said, finally aloud, "Josh. It's nice to finally meet you up close."

"Yeah," the teen said with a grin, "You definitely look nice up close."

Derek smacked the back of his head, lightly but with a message, and the teen grimaced. "Trust me; even you're not that good, kid. She's way out of your league."

But, Josh just kept staring at her, eyes wide and dumb. "Dude, you didn't tell me your stepsis was hot."

"That's because she's not."

Casey furrowed her brows, halfway between grateful and slighted at his remark. She reached to slip off her coat, when Derek said to the smitten to teen, "Now put your hands over your eyes, and turn around."

_What?_

"What?" Josh echoed aloud, finally dragging his eyes away from Casey and unto his coach.

Derek nodded impatiently. "Just do it."

Josh was frozen, silent, and then Casey watched with equal befuddlement as he finally acquiesced, slowly turning around.

"Um, now what?" asked the confused teen.

"Open your eyes, try again; and say 'hi' to her like you have some sense."

"But, I don't have any sense," Josh said plainly, "Isn't that what you're always telling me?"

"Ha! He's kidding; he's just kidding," Derek said, sending a sheepish look to Casey's arched brow, "Or he, you know, must of have misheard me or something."

"No, I didn't. You just sai-"

"Okay, Joshy boy, go in the kitchen and wait for me, 'kay?"

Derek gave the boy a not so gentle push on the shoulder and then turned slowly, hesitantly back to Casey, Josh muttering in the background. Casey snorted at him, her voice a mix of confusion and wry amusement. "Are we…adopting?"

"Cute," Derek said sarcastically, although he couldn't keep the smile from tipping his lips, "You know how I was reluctant to take the job at Benson?"

"Yeah."

"Well, apparently I was insane; because my job…? _Sucks. _Josh's mom pretty much extorted me into keeping an eye on him outside the rink; like this is some lameo "Big Brother" program, or something."

"Um…_what?_"

"I know, right? It's the only way I could get her to let him back on the team though."

Casey squinted as she shut the coat closet. Maybe she _had _walked into the wrong house--or at least a parallel universe. Since when did Derek agree to do things like this? No matter how badly he wanted to win (which was admittedly really, really badly), he always had limits. Namely his free time and general welfare.

"So, we _are _adopting then," she said dryly.

"It's just temporary," Derek muttered, running a hand through his hair.

Her eyes couldn't help but follow the trail of his fingers through his wavy locks. His hair kept getting longer, less scruffy now, soft and tamed back on his head, like it was their senior year of high school. She kept telling him to cut it, and he kept ignoring her, which she secretly liked anyway, because (and she tried not to think about it too much), she'd always loved his hair.

O_h, wow, is he still talking…?_

"…kind of weird for you or whatever," Derek was saying, "But, I figured since you're at work all the time anyway-"

"I'm not at work _all_ the time," she said instantly, defensively. It was a lie and they both knew it (especially now that she'd taken on this research fellowship opportunity). But it was depressing to hear someone actually say it aloud.

"Fine," Derek said dryly, "Not all the time, just all the time in the _human_ sense. But, we all know you're superhuman."

Casey frowned and set down her purse before following him a few steps into the living room. That last part had sounded less amused, and more agitated than Derek's voice usually was. Her mouth parted, ready to question him, when he shrugged it off and moved on. "Anyway; he'll only be here 'til about six. Then his mom will pick him up and I can pretend this isn't really my life, and this isn't actually happening to me."

Casey rolled her eyes. "Please, it's not that big of a deal. He's just a teenager; how bad could he possibly-"

_CRASH. _

Casey inhaled tiredly, and followed Derek's jogging form into the kitchen.

***

"Sorry about the plates," Josh mumbled.

Casey shrugged, and tried (really, really hard) not to care that she'd gotten these plates during a once in a life time, mind blowing department sale last summer and had hand-cleaned them obsessively ever since. "Oh, well, you know; plate's just a plate, right?"

She scooped the last bit of shards up and into the bin, in her mind enacting a sort of slow motion memorial, while Derek sent her a knowing smirk.

"She must like you," Derek said to Josh, "I broke her lamp by accident our junior year of high school…"

"It was not by accident," she grumbled.

"And, she didn't talk to me for a week."

Casey rolled her eyes, but Josh seemed to brighten a little, so she let it go. There was a somewhat awkward silence then, (only for her, because she'd noticed men were much more at home sitting and not looking at each other for long periods of time), and Casey sighed, sitting down at the island.

"So…Josh," she said, "You hungry?"

"That depends. Can you cook?"

Casey quirked her lips, put off and oddly charmed by him at the same time. Derek chuckled, like it was the most preposterous thing he'd ever heard, and she glowered at him until he said, "She's a great cook; that's the only reason I keep her around."

"And, because you're too cheap to get your own place," she said, pretending she wasn't secretly flattered. Derek always wolfed down her food. But he also wolfed down cereal, hot dogs, and anything else in a five mile radius. He'd never actually articulated any particular appreciation for her meals.

"Why don't you make us some French toast. And bacon," he said with a lopsided smile.

Okay, if she didn't know any better she would have sworn that now _he_ was trying to charm her. She answered him with a pointed look. "Because it's dinner, Derek; not breakfast."

"Wow, are you like a mom, or something?" Josh asked, his face scrunched up.

"Ugh," Casey set her hand on her hips, "How old do you think I am?"

"Um.."

"Dude, don't' answer that," Derek interjected, sending a Josh a warning look, "And, if a woman ever forces you to answer--which you should never, ever let her--lie and guess younger."

Josh nodded, eyes thoughtful, like Derek was reading sacred scripture to him, and Casey rolled her eyes.

"O, the depths of your endless wisdom," she mumbled.

She turned to grab the bread for French toast (because yes, she couldn't resist a double whammy of obnoxious charm), when she heard Josh ask, "So, are you single?"

"Yes," she said turning back slowly, and catching Derek's amused grin out of the corner of her eye, "But, I'm also about twice your age, hon."

"That's alright. People say I'm really mature for a teenager," Josh said reassuringly and with his best smile as he leaned forward on the island.

"What people?" Derek asked, "Four year olds? Because I'm pretty sure I saw you stick a carrot up your nose at practice yesterday."

"Yeah," Josh said, sending him a confused look, "Only 'cus you dared me though."

"Oh, right." Derek sent her a sheepish look--one of many that afternoon--and shrugged, "Yeah, well, it was still immature. And, Casey only dates really mature, really boring, really nerdy rich guys."

"Derek!" she hissed.

But, Josh was unflappable. "Rich, huh? I've been saving up my allowance."

"Where, in a piggybank?" Derek asked.

"Piggybank or not," Casey said, sending Derek an annoyed look, "He probably has more pennies than your broke tail." Derek scowled at her as she turned to Josh, slipping into her more responsible voice, "And, I think it's very admirable to be fiscally responsible."

"Fiscally?" Josh said, squinting, "Like in a gym?"

Casey sighed and Derek patted his back, chuckling, "That a boy."

****

"Alright, monkey," Derek said to Josh--which earned him a scowl from Casey, which he ignored, "We got about a half hour 'til your mom picks you up; so how 'bout you start some of your homework?"

"How 'bout…no?" Josh said.

"Or about how you don't start next game?"

"Pfft, you wouldn't."

"I really, really would."

Casey glanced up from her files on the couch, watching the exchange with curiosity. It struck her that she'd never really seen Derek try to discipline children before; not since his highly insane and highly unorthodox interactions with Edwin and Marti anyway. She looked down and pretended to not be paying attention as the two stared each other down.

"I'll do my French homework," Josh finally said, "If your stepsis comes by practice this week; you know, to see me in action."

Okay, so there was no pretending now. Casey openly and agitatedly glared across the room. "Okay, you listen here, young man. I am not some commodity you can just-"

"Deal; she'll be there. Now grab your pencil and start your French before your mom gets back; kay?"

"Sweet; cool."

Josh winked at Casey's indignant form, before grabbing his books and hurrying towards the dining room table.

Apparently Derek could read her look, could sense the oncoming avalanche of ranting, because he moved swiftly to her, hopping over the back of the couch, and landing smoothly beside her. Some of her files hopped up and she scowled at him. "Derek…"

"I know; I know, you're not a commodity."

"Or a…" she leaned over and whispered to him, "Lady of the Night." Derek snorted and she smacked him. "That's not funny. What kind of message are you sending him, having him barter me like that."

"I don't know what 'barter; means," Derek said, "But, you need to relax. He's just….looking for a maternal role model."

"He's looking at my chest," she said tightly.

"Was he?" Derek's quirked his brows, "Okay, smart boy. But I'll stop him from that; promise. Just help me out this one time."

" '_Just help me out this one time_,'" she parroted, rolling her eyes.

"That's a 'yes', right?"

She rolled her eyes again, because yes, that was a yes.

She sighed, wondering distantly when Derek actually _had _started playing her like this. With his stupid eyes and that stupid tilt of his lips. On some random day during the last year, it had become annoyingly and insanely hard to say 'no' to it. She was convinced it was the beginning of her downfall.

She shifted a file on her lap, and she felt Derek shift on the couch behind her. Surprisingly though, he wasn't moving to leave, but instead slipped his arm on the couch behind her. Casey quirked a brow at him, because he'd already obviously gotten what he'd wanted from her, and she was still, obviously, working.

"What?" she asked him.

He shrugged, didn't answer her, and then just sat there, looking blankly ahead.

"Alright," Casey said under her breath, "Someone's been sniffing glue again."

She flipped another page and unconsciously crossed her leg towards him as he watched her. She'd skimmed about a third of the way through the page, when finally she couldn't take it anymore and she had to ask again, "_What_?"

Her eyes were wide, exasperated as she looked back at him. But he just sat there with this weird tilt to his lips. "Have we met?"

"What are you even talking about, Mo Mo?"

"I'm sorry, it's just…you look familiar," he said squinting at her. She rolled her eyes as she saw where this was going, "Like maybe I've seen you before, in a past life."

"It has not been that long since I saw you," Casey said tiredly.

"It's been at least week. I saw you on Wednesday, I think. But, it might have just been a blur, or my reflection as I was passing by a mirror."

Casey sighed as he reached over and slipped the folder from her lap. "Derek."

She didn't fight him though, because he was sort of right. And, she hadn't really talked to him (not for real) all week. Which maybe explained why she'd felt kind of…off, or something else she couldn't quite put her finger on. It was kind of like how she felt when he was away, but a duller, muted sensation, since she still caught glimpses of him in the kitchen, or found his trail of laundry by the machine.

"You're really into this new fellowship thing, huh?" she heard him mumble beside her.

She glanced at him, watched him squint at the file. "Yeah, uh, it's actually upside down."

"Right," he said, sheepishly, almost with a flush to his cheeks, which was odd for Derek. "That explains why it made no sense." He flipped it and frowned, "And, still makes no sense."

"It's complicated," she said sympathetically, slipping it back from his grasp.

"Right," he said again.

Silence passed between them, which was also strange, because it seemed like Derek wasn't saying something he wanted to say. And that, never, ever happened.

"So, how's it goin' then? The work thing," Derek finally muttered, glancing away.

"We don't have to talk about it," she said on a sigh, "I know you find it boring and lame or whatever."

"That's not true," he said lowly.

"Yes," she said, and she really believed it, "It is."

She sighed again and stared at the file, trying to decipher why the air had suddenly gotten so weird around them. She couldn't concentrate, not with him staring at her, so again she looked up asked, "_What?_"

His mouth thinned;his eyes were unreadable. "Fine; it's true," he said, "It's boring and lame and I can't tell if I'm reading it upside down up or not. But, I'm not asking about your work; I'm asking about you."

His hand was kneading her shoulder, a gentle rhythm of firmness and softness, and she realized she must have been tense again. She sighed and let her head fall back tiredly against his forearm, her hair spilling over. "It was fine. In that sucky sort of way. Tiring. Long. Demoralizing."

"Yeah?"

"And, the guys made fun of me, as usual. And, Dan hit on me, as usual."

"Okay."

"And, Dr. Doom yelled at me and called me 'medically naive.' And, then he gave me a bunch of files to take home and memorize before the next smack down."

His hand was running her hair, which she realized suddenly that she really, really liked, too, and she craned her neck, turning to look at him. "You?"

She watched his eyes slide away from his ministrations. "Heh, well; started off normal anyway. Worked out, went to a coaching meeting, watched game tapes….then it was practice and uh Hockey Mentoring 101."

"Speaking of," Casey said, straightening, "Josh has been pretty qui-"

_CRASH._

Okay….so this was going to be interesting.

***

"Heard you're adopting," Teddy said, dropping his tray and himself in the empty seat beside Casey, "Some kid from Africa?"

Casey sighed and sent Kellie a long, pointed look. She loved Kellie, she really did; but, that girl could not keep a secret for the life of her. Even odder is how they always ended up mutating into something bizarre and utterly inaccurate. It was like Hospital Telephone or something.

"Eh, no," Casey finally said, her nose scrunching at Teddy's curious face, "He's not African. And, we're not adopting him; not for real."

"So, what?" Teddy asked squinting, "You're like kidnapping him?"

"What? N-"

"Woah, didn't know you had it in you, Case," said Dan, plopping in the chair across from her and next to Kellie.

"Had what in me?" she asked warily.

"You know, donating an organ for that Taiwanese kid, or whatever."

"She's a very, very brave soul," Kellie said, her voice and her gaze full of mock awe.

"And, you are a very, very crazy…something crazy," Casey said, rolling her eyes. She looked around the table, exasperated, "None of that is true; obviously. How do you all have doctorates and still fall for these things?"

"Meh," Dan squirted ketchup on his burger, "Got nothing better to do."

"Plus I could totally see you adopting some kid; you know from one of those commercials or something," Teddy said, the crumbs of his food hanging carelessly on his chin, "You're like Miss Kid USA."

"_Doctor_ Miss Kid USA," she said. She always made a point to correct the guys' subtle and not so subtle sexism, which was often a full time job on top of everything else. But, then she'd do things like she was doing now--tiredly wiping the last few crumbs from Teddy's cheek.

"Thanks, 'mom'," he mumbled, and she rolled her eyes while the other doctors laughed.

"I can't help it," she said defensively, "I'm a clean freak; and you guys are _incredibly_ disgusting," she said looking between Dan and Teddy pointedly, "It has nothing to do with me being a woman."

"Woah; you're a woman?" Dan said teasingly, "Hadn't noticed with all your non-gendered makeup and jewelry."

"Hey," Casey cried.

Dan stuck his tongue out at her and Casey was poised to retort, when another doctor came up to them, collapsing into a seat in tears. Casey sighed, along with everyone else at the table; because Monica was always crying, every week, almost nonstop. No one was really sure how she made it out of bed each day. Sure, at first it had been understandable (they were all _really_ worn out), but it as kept on, their collective sympathy ran out, even Casey's. Not to mention, Monica's outbursts didn't exactly make it any easier to be a female doctor there.

"What's wrong, sweetie?" Kellie asked dryly, one hand holding a cola to her lips, and the other halfheartedly patting Monica's back.

"I failed again," Monica gasped, taking a tissue from the perfunctory hand of Teddy beside her, "I always fail, _always._"

"You don't always fail," Casey said tiredly.

"And, sometimes, a butterfly's gotta stumble a few times before it takes off," Teddy said. He squinted and looked off in the distance, "Or, wait? Was that a baby chick? I dunno, I saw it on poster somewhere."

"Why don't you go for a walk, darling, and calm yourself down," Dan said with a rare (extremely rare) tinge of sympathy in his voice.

Casey quirked a brow and watched as Monica slowly acquiesced, grabbing another handful of tissues from Teddy, and rising from the table.

"You know," Kellie said, frowning after her, "I almost feel bad for starting that pool on when she's gonna drop out of the program. Almost."

"_Kellie_," Casey hissed.

"And that's exactly why you weren't invited," Kellie said.

"I'm still on for next month, right?" Dan asked, stealing a fry from Kellie's tray.

Kellie smacked his hand away, but then nodded, "Yup."

"You guys are shameless," Casey mumbled.

"Hey, not all of us get the V.I.P. treatment here to keep us entertained," Teddy said.

Dan snorted. "Or have Dr. Doom pulling us along on a golden leash."

"Hey," Casey cried again, "It is so not like that."

She looked to Kellie for support, but the blonde simply shrugged apologetically. "It sort of really is, babe," Kellie said, "But, who cares? You should feel so freakishly stoked, Case. I mean I would kill, literally kill, for Steinmetz to take me under his wing in oncology."

"Even if it met even less sleep and zero social life?" Casey asked under her breath.

"Uh yaduh," they all said in unison.

"Oh." Casey glanced around sheepishly at their exasperated faces, "Right, of course."

****

It took a small miracle, (and lots of agonizing haggling with Dan), but Casey was able to move her shift so she could make practice. She even tried to look somewhat hockeyesque--which in retrospect was ridiculous--and wore one of Derek's old hockey sweatshirts to the rink.

On her way in she ran into Ralph, whom she hadn't seen in forever.

Ralph was one of the few Thompson high alums still in the area. He'd tried the community college thing for a year or so, predictably dropped out (apparently to join some weird French circus thing), before he settled back at his dad's ice skating rink. He was still as ridiculous as ever (and responsible for more than a few of Derek's most recent misadventures), but he'd matured over the years. He was even a pretty decent manager, and he had a lot of fun on the Zamboni.

After exchanging a few one-liners and promising that'd she cook for him in the near future, Casey headed to the ice. She was a little late, so Derek and the players were already out there, doing warmups, and hockey moves she couldn't identify or pronounce.

She paused by the boards on her way to the benches and watched him. It took him a minute or two, and several rants at the players, but then he finally turned and saw her.

It was cute, how his face lit up, almost as boyishly as Josh beside him. If Derek was anything it was an attention whore. And she knew he loved to show off for her, especially with things he was much, much better at it.

Casey rolled her eyes, like she was annoyed or something--which she wasn't, which he probably knew--and headed to find a spot on the bench. She grabbed a spare seat next to a woman in the front row.

"Hi," she said conversationally, setting her purse down to her right, "You have brother on the team?"

"Uh, no actually," the girl said somewhat sheepishly. A brief silence followed, the kind that always did in first meetings, and then she asked Casey, "You?"

"Yeah, my stepbro; he's on the coaching staff."

"Oh, cool, awesome," she said, "That's really sweet of you to come out; and only for a practice, too."

_Yeah,_ Casey thought, _He owes me big time._

Casey sighed and leaned back, trying to get comfortable, and watch practice (it didn't seem like the conversation was really going anywhere). She smiled to herself, exasperated and bemused each time Josh would look up to the stands, winking at her. _Oh, yeah; he owes me. Big._

"I can't believe I'm actually doing this," said the girl to Casey's surprise. Casey's eyes traveled slowly from the rink, questioning. "I uh…this is kind of embarrassing, and I totally don't usually do things like this, but I um, I saw this guy; the head coach…" She gestured to Derek on the ice and Casey's eyes bugged, "…in a bar a few weeks ago. He just looked so sad and sweet; I gave him my number."

_S'no problem. Hung out with the guys. Some girl hit on me._

_Ohhh_, Casey thought blankly, _Some girl_. She couldn't help it, because she was Casey--and more importantly female--she looked at the girl, assessing her. She was pretty, not the usual bombshell Derek wrangled in, but she was attractive in a cutesy, innocent sort of way. Long, dirty blonde hair, tiny dimples, gorgeous eyes. Yeah, Casey could see how she'd be his type.

"Honestly, I'm surprised he called," she said.

"Yeah, me, too."

The girl quirked her brow, and Casey's face scrunched sheepishly. She hadn't meant to say that aloud, but she and Derek were close, and they didn't really hide romantic interests from each other. She was more than a little surprised that he hadn't mentioned her--someone he obviously deemed important enough to invite to his hockey practice--save for one passing comment. Not to mention, he hadn't really been on the "D prowl" (as Ralph had so aptly named it) since Rebecca.

"Um, sorry. I'm Casey," she said with a polite smile, "Derek's stepsister. I was just surprised because he hadn't mentioned you."

As soon as she'd said it, she realized how unintentionally bitchy that had sounded. She backtracked.

"Not--not that's means anything; he's a guy. Guys are, you know, weird sometimes."

"Yeah, well," She smiled a little uncomfortably. But, then she shrugged it off with a smile and offered Casey her hand. "I'm Katie, by the way."

"Nice to meet you, Katie."

"Yeah, you, too. What are the odds?"

_Greater than you'd think_, Casey thought absently. When Derek had played at Queens, there'd been a revolving bench of girls coming to watch him play. "_Works like a charm_," he'd always say to her afterwards, with that signature smirk of his. It had been somewhat annoying (but mostly just amusing) to see the flavor of the week swooning, and gushing, and cheering at him each game. But, that had really died out by the time he hit the minors. Then he'd met the Wicked Witch of the North and gotten aboard that train wreck of pain. Casey had assumed he'd grown out of the move, but apparently being single again had resurrected it.

"Yeah," Casey said quietly, "It's, uh, really crazy how things work out, huh?"

"Yup."

There was a stretch of long, awkward silence, both girls watching the rink as Derek and the other assistant coaches shouted instructions at the players.

"He seems like he's really good with kids," Katie said.

Casey glanced away from Derek, who'd been demonstrating some ridiculous hockey move, and smirked slightly, scenes of Josh and him from earlier flashing in her mind. "Heh, yeah, he…he really is," she said honestly, thoughtfully, "He doesn't like to admit it, and he walks around all annoyed-like about the kids on the team, but…I can tell he cares about them."

A whistle blew and Derek proceeded to harangue a random forward, loudly, and sarcastically.

Casey smiled sheepishly at Katie, "He just, um, shows it in his own way."

Katie was smiling, too. "Yeah. He kept going on and on about his little sister, Marti."

_Classic D Prowl,_ Casey thought.

"And, his stepsister, Lizzie. And, uh, I thought he'd said, 'Spacie'--which didn't really make any sense; but apparently it was Casey," Katie said with a sheepish look.

_Okay, so that was new_. "Pfft, really?" She couldn't keep the sarcastic tinge from her voice, "Hopefully nothing too humiliating."

"Actually, no." Katie paused, her eyes softening slightly, "It was really sweet, and you guys are apparently really close. It, um, it's actually part of what attracted me to him. I mean, how many guys care so much about their sisters, you know?"

"Yeah," Casey said quietly, her eyes straying back to Derek on the ice.

"Hopefully, I've made a slightly nondtizy first impression?" She heard Katie say self consciously to her left.

"Huh, oh, yeah, of course." Casey smiled, really brightly to drive home the point, "You seem really nice."

"Yeah, you, too."

***

After practice ended, Casey was only mildly surprised (but, secretly, more than mildly put off) that Derek bee-lined towards Katie: swooning girl number 5,000,001. She guessed it was cute, in a dorky sort of way, how nervous they both were. Derek because it had been a while, especially for him, and Katie because…well, she wasn't sure. That seemed to be part of her whole shy girl thing, though.

Casey rolled her eyes as Derek sent a beaming Katie off with his signature, slam dunk smirk, and then she grabbed her purse, walking over to him.

"Works like a charm," was the first obnoxious thing he said to her.

Casey sighed and leaned against the boards as he skated up to her. "So I guess this means you're finally breaking that _devoutly_ religious call to celibacy, huh?"

Derek snorted. "Please, even I don't work that fast. I'm just...trying things out."

"By inviting her to hockey practice? Never seen _that_ move before."

"Hey, hey; I'm a little rusty here; I gotta stick to the basics."

"Riiight," she said dryly. And, she wasn't annoyed, she kept telling herself. This was amusing, not agitating. Not in the least bit. "I'm just surprised you didn't bring her up, that's all," Casey said before she could stop herself.

Derek sent her a quizzical look. "Well, I dunno, it must've slipped my mind." He shrugged, "Plus you've been busy, or whatever."

She frowned. He'd been saying that lot to her lately. Was she really gone that much?

He cleared his throat, watching her expectantly. "Soo?"

"So what?"

"So, you're a girl," he said smirking, "Which means you've made some sort of judgment about her…" Casey rolled her eyes, and pretended like it couldn't possibly be true, "So, what do you think?"

"She's um, you know, nice. Really friendly. And, pretty. And, most importantly," Casey said, now with her own tiny smirk, "Blonde."

"Hey, hey; I don't _only_ date blondes."

"Pop quiz," Casey blurted, "Name the last nonblonde girl you ever dated."

"I uh, I um…umm….?"

"Exactly."

He straightened, indignantly. "Well, you name the last guy you've dated who didn't wear ritzy, obnoxious business suits for a living."

Casey rolled her eyes. "Hey, well, every girl needs a sugar daddy," she said sardonically, "Plus, it was nice being around _refined_ men for once."

"Was it also nice being around _'_refined' assholes?"

_Meh, that part, not so much._

She had had a pretty rough run with guys lately. Apparently what she thought she wanted--successful, driven, wildly intelligent and charming--kind of went hand in hand with being a narcissistic jerk. Chris, her last serious boyfriend, had been especially 'charming.' She'd accidentally answered his cell when he was over the house, only to have a nice chat with 'Liza,' his fiance. She'd been crushed. And, so had his face when Derek had found out. She went on and on about how barbaric that had been, but was secretly pretty ecstatic to see Chris being pummeled (her lone exception to the pacifism rule).

Derek's eyes still got agitated when he thought about Chris; like now, for instance.

"Okay, let's not take this wildly unfun trip down memory lane," Casey said. She leaned towards him, smiling sweetly, "You wanna take your _oh, so favorite stepsis_ home now?"

Derek groaned, looking away. "She told you what I said, didn't she?"

"We're women; all we do is talk about this stuff."

"All those things I said; it was only to score."

"Mmmhmm."

Derek sighed, and one heavy, worn skate made it out the rink, before he paused, looking behind him. Casey turned back when she realized he wasn't following her. "What? You forget something?"

He shook his head, although his back was still towards her, and asked, "When's the last time you were out on the ice?"

Casey's eyes narrowed and she answered slowly. "Sophomore year of college. When I fell on my ass in front of thirty people. And, you _knew_ that, Derek."

"Yeah, I did," he said, turning back with a crooked smile. "Why don't you come out with me? It's an embarrassment to be Canadian and not skate."

"Nooo, I'm pretty sure it's more embarrassing to bust your ass in public."

"Come on." He pulled out that grin, and those eyes again, and she actually had to look away, cross her arms, to try to resist it.

"No," she whined, "I'm clumsy and I'm tired."

"You're always clumsy; you're always 'tired'."

This time he was whining a little, and she watched indignantly, as he trudged off the ice, brushing past her. She huffed. "Well, you seem to find plenty of ways to entertain yourself in my absence," she said without thinking.

That got his attention, and he turned instantly, brows furrowed. "What's supposed to mean?"

"It means nothing," she said tiredly. And she was (almost) sure that was true. Anyway, she was too tired to be self-reflective. But what she did know, was that she was in serious danger of having a very grumpy Derek and negative ten social life. "Fine," she sighed after a moment, "I'll get on the ice. But only for a little while," she said to Derek's brightening face, "And, you promise not to make fun of me, right?"

"Never," he said with a smile, "Now, let's go."

***

"Annhh, Derek!"Casey cried, laughing as she almost collapsed _again_.

He laughed, too, and slid up from behind her, his arm coming around her back, and hers anchoring on his shoulder.

"You totally let go on purpose," she said.

"Yeah, yeah, I totally did." He grinned, and took her with him around the curve, "But, I'm not training wheels, Case; I can't hold you up the whole time."

"Well, you could at least warn me."

"Eh, maybe; but that'd be less fun."

He let go again and she shrieked. But, then she was surprised to find herself balancing slowly, coming to a choppy, but safe stop on the ice. He slid up to her and she gripped him somewhat breathlessly. His lips quirked, his eyes warmed, and then he said what she wasn't expecting. "You never have fun anymore."

She rolled her eyes, because Derek always said things like that: about how she was a nerd, had a boring job, etc, etc. But, when she looked back at him, he wasn't smiling anymore. He was serious.

"Of course I do, silly," she said, her own smile slipping.

"I guess I um," he frowned, his forehead creasing uncertainly, "Don't see it then. Or you, I guess."

She looked at him, reading his eyes before they could close up on her, and her lips pursed. Suddenly, all his little comments clicked into place. "You're worried about me?" And, sure enough, she could instantly see his face closing off, see his posture stiffening at even the suggestion of genuine emotion. "You know, you could just say that. It wouldn't make you any less 'manly', or whatever."

He looked like he wanted to skate away from her and go do pushups, or watch sports, or something else far, far away from this conversation. Instead he glanced away and rubbed the back of his head.

"Well, you've never really said anything good about your job, you know; except like once."

"Hey," she said, her voice tender, but firm. She tugged by his elbow, making him face her again, "I'm fine. For real. Pinky swear, cross my heart, hope to die, all that jazz."

His eyes came back to her, somewhat reluctantly, and she could see that gentle brown he so often hid from her under his aloof façade. Then he shrugged and said probably the only thing he could, "S'good."

"Oh, Derek."

She sighed at his endearing ineptitude, and then, without thinking, slid her hands around his torso, squeezing. He tensed, his eyes flickering, and she was surprised, too, because she knew they didn't do the hugging thing (not for real).

"Sorry," she mumbled.

She moved to pull away, but his hands grasped her elbows, sending both of them sliding somewhat awkwardly backward with her momentum, and then following her even more clumsily into a embrace. She gripped his shoulders, just not to fall, and then she left them there, his arms looping around her waist.

"S'okay," he said, the blades of his skates cutting the ice, anchoring them.

The outside of her right skate pressed to the inside of his left, and the first thing she thought to herself, was that years ago he'd let her fall flat on her ass. Now, he was holding her up, his hand right above her hip where she 'd never felt it before. He shifted it instantly though, as soon as she was steady, and it all felt very awkward and strange and…nice.

"You guys almost done here?"

She glanced up, her cheeks blushing at Ralph's questioning voice. They must have looked pretty odd, standing there, embracing on the ice.

"Yeah, yeah, Ralphy, we'll be off in a sec."

"Sorry to ruin the feel good family moment! It's touching, really!"

"Ha, ha; I'll see ya in sec."

He looked down at her and they slipped apart, Casey hugging her arms to herself self consciously. And, actually she kind of wanted to be hugging him again. But then that didn't really make any sense or seem particularly appropriate, so she let it go.

"Yeah, well," Derek sent her his patented 'whatever' look, and started skating slowly back, his hand on her elbow, "I hope you're not planning on making that a habit; this isn't 7th Heaven."

"Really?" Casey asked, happy the for quick and easy distraction, "Because it's very 'Pastor Camden's son' of you to take in a kid from the neighborhood."

"Oh, god," Derek said, sounding mortified, "You're right. My life is turning into an ABC Family sitcom."

"Better yet, a holiday special."

She smirked at him and he groaned as they walked off the ice.

***


	5. Chapter 5

****Oh, yays, wow, talk about a lot of reviews. It seems cliché to keep thanking you guys, but I'll go ahead anyway: thanks ;)**

**This part was SO incredibly hard for me to write. But, alas, every writer gets to a point where she has to throw her hands up in the air and hope to God her work turned out alright. **

**So, anyway, I'd really appreciate your constructive feedback on this part….**

**P.S. For those of you **_**Bones **_**fans out there, see you if you can catch my mini shout-out to the show ;)  
**

*******

**Heart Murmurs, Part 4**

***

"This is your heart."

Casey held up her fist.

"It makes sounds that we can hear when we listen closely, with a stethoscope. It has a rhythm, which is very important."

She tapped her knuckles gently against her clipboard with steady, slow knocks.

"_Lub dub, lub dub, lub dub,_" she chanted, "Sometimes, your heart speeds up; like when you're excited, or scared, or really happy to see someone."

She tapped harder, knocking against the clipboard again, like it was a door.

"Usually, especially in a cute little kid like yourself, that's totally normal. Because you're so big and happy and strong, that your heart's actually physically closer to your chest. So it's easier for me to hear through my stethoscope. It's just trying to say 'hello', like a friend."

She kept knocking, and smiling gently, reassuringly as she continued.

"And, sometimes, your heart's trying tell you something super important, like when your friends tell you a secret. So gets it's a little louder; so you can hear it better…"

Her knocking was louder.

"Or sometimes really quiet, like a whisper…"

Her knocking softened.

"So you pay extra close attention to it. You understand?"

The young girl, Amy, nodded slowly, from where she was sitting on the hospital bed. Her mother, who was standing anxiously beside her, had brought in her earlier that morning, because she'd been getting dizzy and faint during soccer practice. "Like…like a conversation," Amy said quietly.

"Exactly," Casey said, nodding. "So what we need to do is communicate back to it: listen closer, take some pictures, with chest x-rays, and an echocardiogram. Which I just like to call an ECHO."

"That's a much cooler name."

"Totally."

"Alright," the mother said, her voice calmer, yet still apprehensive, "So when will we know if this is a good 'secret' or …"

She trailed, off, glancing at her daughter, and Casey interjected. "We can do the tests right away. But once, again, there's so no reason to panic. A lot of children have heart murmurs at some point, and most are completely innocuous. It's not a diagnosis on it's own; just something to monitor."

"Alright," the mother said again, nodding.

"There's a lot more in your pamphlet, but," Casey waved her had dismissively, "I just think it's really dense, and confusing…and it's not even in color," she added, scrunching her nose at Amy.

Amy shifted up, then, staring at the stethoscope hanging on Casey's neck, "Can I listen to your heart? Like a secret?"

Casey glanced to her mother, who just shrugged slightly, bemused, and then she turned back to Amy. "Sure, babe; knock yourself out. I can't promise it will say anything too interesting, though."

Casey ducked her head and lifted the stethoscope from her shoulders. Then she set it gingerly against Amy's neck. Her eyes lit and she instantly set it to Casey's chest, squeezing her eyes shut and listening.

"Yours sounds nice," Amy said after a moment, which the more analytical part of Casey's brain thought made absolutely no logical sense; but the softer part appreciated, "That means you're a good person."

Casey's eyes and voice gentled. "Thank you. Your heart sounds like you're really sweet, too. And, I can medically, certifiably determine these things; because I'm doctor."

Amy beamed, her fingers tracing the stethoscope. "Can I keep this?"

Casey snorted and exchanged an amused glance with Amy's mother. "I'd love for you to keep that; I really would. But, unfortunately, if you did I couldn't do my job and listen to hearts, which would make me a really lame doctor…and possibly get me _fired_," she said dramatically.

Amy nodded, and then slowly, reluctantly handed it back to her. "I understand."

"But, hey; you never know. Maybe one day, when you grow up, strong and healthy, you'll become a doctor, too. And, then, they virtually _have_ to givet one to you."

She winked at her and Amy grinned. "Awesome."

***

"You're too friendly with them, MacDonald," Dr. Drew said, setting several images before her on the table, "You are not their friend, you are their doctor. And, you never know what results you may have to deliver to them, so it's best not to be too…" He paused, glancing pointedly at her, "Perky."

Right. The perky thing again. Apparently being kind, and showing basic human decency to her patients made her 'perky.' A lot of the other female residents avoided this title like the plague, acting like bitches so others would respect them. But, that wasn't her M.O. Although, she had on more than one occasion felt like bitch-slapping her supervisors.

She sighed. At least he'd finally gotten her name right.

"I was just making conversation."

"At, first, yes. But, there's always a line you shouldn't cross."

"She's a child; not a case file or a lab rat, even if this is a research hospital." Casey's eyebrows jumped, surprised to find herself actually speaking up to him for once. Dr. Drew eyes' widened, because apparently so was he.

She swallowed uncomfortably, anxiously, until Dr. Drew finally dropped the last image before her.

"What do you see here?"

_I guess this is I told you so,_ she thought glumly, her eyes instantly registering the problem. It was so bitterly textbook.

Her jaw twitched and she exhaled, glancing away as she muttered, ""Branch pulmonary artery stenosis; bilateral branch."

"Correct," he said dryly, "And, what would you recommend to the surgeon?"

She sighed, leaning forward and digging the heel of her palm into forehead. "Um, angioplasty…possibly stent implantation."

Dr. Drew slipped the images back into the file and closed it, turning to her.

"And do you think her mother will take this any easier because you smiled at her child and let her play with your stethoscope?"

"No. Obviously, no," she said tightly.

"Then what do you hope to accomplish in your time here, Casey?" Her eyes flashed at his use of her first name as he continued, "Medical competence, or popularity?"

"Both," she said instantly, instinctively, "Because excuse me for being 'medically naïve'; but I happen to think you need both to be a good doctor."

"Argue your point, MacDonald; don't be sloppy."

"I can't just blithely hand someone a pamphlet and tell them they need surgery, need someone to cut them open, because they have a leaking valve, or-or a freaking, gaping hole in their heart and call that 'medical competence.' That's just…that's just being an ass," she said bluntly. "And you know what? I think they will take it better; I think they will. Because they know that I actually care what happens to her; they actually understand what I'm saying to them, and they trust that I'll help the surgeons make the best decision for her."

"Are you finished?" Dr. Drew asked, his face a smooth, messageless slate.

Casey gasped, and she realized her chest was heaving, her face flushed. "Um…yeah, I am."

He held out the file. "Then you give them the news. And, remember to smile and be popular, while you tell a woman her eight year old daughter needs heart surgery."

Casey took it, face pinched, as he walked out of the room.

***

The boys were really happy when she got home, running around the living room throwing foam balls, pillows, and any other non-lethal thing they could get their hands on.

Normally, that would have been really cute, endearing (and part of her registered that it still really was).

But, she wasn't in a 'perky' mood, so when the beach ball slapped her in the face in the foyer, she didn't laugh, or smirk, or pretend lecture them. She just said tiredly, softly. "_Derek_."

The room froze and noise fled like her voice had been thunder. Which in it way it really had been, because her tone had always been helplessly expressive no matter what emotion she tried to conceal. And, Derek in particular, was skilled in reading it.

"I'm really, really, really not in the mood right now. I had an awful day, my back hurts, and I'm tired, okay?"

"_Okay_," Josh said instantly, eyes wide and apprehensive.

"Okay," Derek said, too, obediently.

She groaned, (because she hated feeling like a bitchy old mom or something), and rubbed tiredly at her eyes as she climbed the steps.

***

Her face was buried in her pillow, her aching stomach pressed to her mattress when the door creaked open behind her.

"Casey?" she heard him whisper. A sliver of flight crept into the room and he called again, "You up?"

"Does it look like I'm up?" she said wryly from her bed.

"No." He stepped in and closed the door behind him, "Except for the whole talking part."

She couldn't see him, could only hear him as his feet padded the carpet, a steady rhythm towards her bed.

"Move over," he said.

Tiredly, blankly, she obeyed.

He plopped on her bed, his back bouncing against her mattress, bouncing her slightly her, too, from his weight.

"Talk to me," he said plainly.

She sighed and turned from where her back was facing him, her cheek pressing against the pillow. "It's just a job, Derek; it's a job. And, I work on hearts, which, duh, are complicated and fragile and unpredictable even the in the healthiest people. And sometimes, sometimes things go really, really wrong. Even when they shouldn't. The valves, you know, they…they can't withstand…especially when you're a child…"

She trailed off and she knew he didn't understand, knew she was fumbling her words, her thoughts. But it didn't matter because his hand was smoothing by her temple anyway, brushing hair away, and stroking down her cheek.

"And, and, and so I leave; because it's a job. But, I can't actually _leave_, or sleep, because…it won't go away. And, I don't even know it should go away, or if I even want it to. Or-or if that's cold, or bitchy or...uh, I don't know."

She sighed and squeezed her eyes shut, trying to close it out, trying to steal some rest anyway.

"Don't force it," she heard him murmur, "You always try to force things. Just close your eyes and relax."

"I can't relax," she said, her eyes opening tiredly.

"Sit up."

He leaned up on his elbow and then pressed up against it, rising on her mattress.

This didn't make any particular sense to her, but she was tired, and kind of out of options, so she obliged.

"You better not prank me," she muttered halfheartedly.

"Not a prank," he said, "Now, turn around."

She did and guessed dryly, "Magic trick?"

"Not a magic trick, Spacey."

His large hands covered her shoulders, squeezing and rubbing gently, and she tried not to over think how ridiculously good that felt; tried to relax. She couldn't remember a time he'd actually touched her like this, so affectionate and open about it, but she didn't question it.

"How's that?" he asked her, his hands still moving, and his cheek pressed gently to her temple.

_That's really, really good._

"S'good," he whispered in her ear, and she was suddenly glad it was dark and he couldn't see her flush, since apparently she'd said that aloud." I want you to feel good."

Okay, she was too tired to analyze this, which was probably good, since her mind was already bursting into threads from his hands, his words. "Don't stop," she said, and hoped to God it sounded less whiny than it felt.

"I won't."

There was a knocking at the door, and they both stiffened, before Derek slid from the bed behind her and crossed her carpet.

"My mom's here," she heard Josh say as soon as Derek opened the door.

"Alright. Tell her I said 'hi', and I'll pick you up from school on Monday."

"Okay." He whispered then (but kind of badly, because Casey could still hear him). "She okay?"

"Yeah, she's just tired is all."

"Okay," he said, "Tell her I got a B on my math test."

"Heh. Okay."

She heard the door close quietly, the light creeping back into the hallway, and Casey sighed and sprawled out on her bed, her body buzzing contently as she sank into the mattress.

She felt the bed dip again. Then Derek's hand trail her back. "You okay?"

"Mmmm, better," she said honestly, her eyes fluttering shut.

He was still there, which was odd, but also comforting, so she didn't question it. She pressed her cheek to her pillow and felt him pull the covers over her shoulders. "Mmm, s'nice," she mumbled.

His hand lingered on her back. "You look…" He paused. "Really peaceful when you sleep."

Also odd.

Also comforting.

And again, she didn't question it as she succumbed to slumber.

***

The next morning she cooked him the biggest breakfast she could think of. French toast, bacon, eggs, biscuits, hash browns. Sure, there was a substantial chance he'd die of a heart attack midway through; but she specialized in hearts, so she'd figure something out.

"Uh…"

His face was dumb, blank as he entered the kitchen. He blinked. "Is this heaven?"

"It's a thank you," she said, her lips curving gently as he walked slowly, in a half stupor towards her.

"Holy Breakfast, Batman. I…" he laughed slightly and his eyes lit up like it was a holiday, "I don't even know where to start, Case."

She reached over and answered him with a fork.

"_Sweet._"

Derek threw himself on a chair and she watched bemusedly as his head darted from plate to plate, flustered, before he finally started feverishly picking pieces from each dish.

Casey snorted and pulled up her own chair beside him, resting her chin in her palm, and pretty openly watching him. "Good?"

"So good, it's ridunkulous."

She smiled.

"I love your food," he said to her for the first time ever. Then he promptly shoved half a biscuit into his mouth. Which was gross, but kind of endearing all at once.

She shrugged, all casual-like, and pretended that wasn't _exactly_ what she'd hoped he would say.

"Well, you know…"

She sighed and then turned to glance happily at the wall calendar. There was a sparkly, star sticker on this Saturday. Her shoulders shimmied a little, and Derek looked up from his eggs, snorting. "Someone's oddly chipper."

"Yeah, well," she shrugged and offered another happy sigh, "Just hyped about my day off is all."

"Taking your invisible boyfriend out for a hot date?"

She sent him a steady, warning look. But then she waved a hand and shrugged it off. "You know what? I'm so happy, I'm gonna let that go."

Derek smirked at her as she grabbed her plate.

"Kellie and Gil are planning some girls night," she said more seriously, "We thought we might check out a movie, or do a spa, or, oh, there's a fondue place on--"

"Unh uh, no more girly scheduling," Derek said, finally freeing his fork from his food, "I get you on off days, remember?"

She scowled at him. "Derek, I am not-"

"My commodity, or property, or wanh, wanh, insert other feminist crap."

Her mouth parted and dropped, indignant. But he spoke right over her.

"There's this lazertag place that just opened up. I know how you like to throw things at me, and shoot things at me, and hit me with various things. And you know how I like to be better than you at stuff (which is easy); so whaddya say?"

Her lips tilted into a helpless smile, because she honestly couldn't remember the last time she'd seen him so excited about anything. Probably not since he and Ralph set off those firecrackers last Christmas and almost got them all killed.

"You've been…" she tried--at least a little--to bite back her smile, "Planning this for a while, haven't you?"

He straightened defensively. "Planning's a bit strong of a word."

"It's sweet," she said with a placating voice.

"It's not sweet; I'm not sweet; nothing's sweet, because nothing's been planned," He said firmly, "I just happened to notice it in the paper a while back."

"What? While you were checking the stocks?"

"Is that a 'yes, or a 'no'?"

"I dunno; I'll have to check with my invisible boyfriend first. You know, since we had that hot date planned n' all."

(That was a 'yes').

"Cute," Derek said dryly, "Endlessly cute…I'm gonna take you down on Sunday, though."

True; because she was going to let him. Derek's ego was always teetering on exploding and vanishing these days, so sometimes she let him have the small things. Well, they were small to her, yet epic in Derek's boy-brain.

But, she played along.

"Pfft, in your insane, childish drea--Sunday?" she said, turning back with a frown, "My day off's on Saturday."

"No ways," he shook his head and ate another forkful, "You keep saying it's on the 7th."

"That _is _the 7th, dumbo."

"Oh. Oh…" his face fell a little, "I, uh, sort of already planned my date with Katie then."

Right. Katie.

Katie was nice. Katie was cute. Katie was a good thing for him, and the idea of Katie didn't agitate Casey at all.

He'd been flirting with her for a while now, inviting her to games, and even talking on the phone. But he'd continued to be so trigger shy about the whole thing, Casey had given up thinking it would really go anywhere.

She felt a sudden stab of that irritation she wasn't feeling, and shrugged, all casual like as she cut into her food. "Oh, well, that's great; super. You should totally go with her."

"You sure?" he asked hesitantly, "I mean you're not exactly swimming in off days."

"It's fine. Really." She turned and looked him straight in the eye to emphasize the point, "I was already thinking of hanging out with Kellie. And, lazertag's kind of a big scoop of lame anyway."

"Oh," he said, blinking. He shrugged a little, "I thought you might like it, but…whatev."

It was silent while she poured her syrup, showering her French toast, and biting agitatedly at her bottom lip.

"Maybe she can teach you how to use a calendar, though. What are you, blind?" Halfhearted. She didn't really care.

"Too many letters, numbers, shapes," he mumbled dryly. He shrugged one arm.

Both jokes missed whatever they were aiming at.

***

"So are we on for Saturday?" Dan drawled, tossing his arm around Casey's shoulder.

Casey sighed tiredly and shrugged it off. She swore he could be just as persistent and twice as clueless as Josh sometimes. "What part of 'no way in hell' are you not getting?"

"The whole part. Have you seen my abs?"

Casey rolled her eyes, and focused on the chart, trying to ignore him. She'd learned over the last few years that Dan had a relatively short attention span. With work, studying, people, everything. Eventually he'd scurry way.

"Come on, Casey. Have some fun for once."

But, apparently, not yet.

"Dan, no. I don't want to have sex with you. And, that's pretty much your only mode with girls outside the workplace."

"Or inside the workplace; I'm flexible." He cocked a brow. "Are you flexi-oww!" he cried as Kellie (who'd suddenly appeared around the corner) smacked him upside his head. "How do you _do _that?"

"I'm psychic," she swung sweetly, "Plus, the hallways echo. Now be gone," she ordered, shoving him to the side.

He glowered at her. But then a cute nurse passed by, and his necked craned, the rest of his body following after her.

"Predictable," Kellie mumbled. She sighed and turned back to Casey, "So, girls' night tomorrow, or what?"

"Looks like it," Casey muttered, scribbling something else on the chart.

"Woah, there, Nelly; don't sound too excited," Kellie said sarcastically, "What's got your goat?"

Casey shrugged. "Nothing, it's just…well, I thought I had plans with Derek, but then he's got this date with Katie, so-"

"Oh, Katie," Kellie interrupted sardonically. She clasped her hands together and held them dramatically to her chest, "That girl you adore and respect oh, so much; almost like you're very own dear sister."

Casey sighed, eyes shutting wearily for a moment, before turning towards her. "Do I even wanna know where this is going?"

"You don't like her," Kellie said bluntly.

"That's not true."

"It is so true. Your eye twitches a little every time you say her name."

"Ugh," Casey folded her arms across her chest. "That's ridiculous."

"Fine," Kellie said, her hand gesturing gamely towards her, "Say it."

"I…don't feel like it," Casey said prissily, her chin tilted high, her shoulders stiff.

"It's okay to admit you don't like someone, Casey." Kellie rolled her eyes and leaned back, propping her elbows on the desk ledge behind them, "It won't make you suddenly bitchy. Actually, it might make you a lot more honest and a lot less repressed."

"I am not repressed."

"You are the medical definition of repressed. On every level." Her lips quirked teasingly, "Maybe you _should _spend the weekend with Dan."

"Ewww, gag me."

Dan was hot. There was pretty much no way to get around that. But, he was also arrogant, self-absorbed, and willing to hump anything that occasionally moved and had two legs. Not exactly her idea of romance.

"I'm just saying. If you utterly refuse to tap that fountain of hotness known as your stepbrother…"

"You do realize how pervy you sound right now…?"

"…then you need to start importing some." She leaned over and whispered ominously, "Before you completely freeze out."

Kellie moved her hands about, making ghost sounds and Casey squinted at her, before huffing, taking her clipboard and walking off.

***

The hour leading up to Derek's date was awkward.

It was the only time they'd probably see each other (he'd still had practice and work earlier in the day). And, Casey wanted to be around him, but not around him at the same time.

The more she thought about Katie and his calendar illiteracy, the more agitated she got. She didn't get many off days, and he'd been circumventing the whole first date thing for a while now. Why couldn't he push it off one more stupid night?

Of course she wasn't going to admit that to him, that she was ridiculously jealous for his time. Because:

A) It was too late anyway.

And,

B) A significant amount of their relationship consisted of things unsaid; and who was she to buck a good tradition?

"Are we…fighting?" Derek asked her, peaking his head hesitantly in her doorway.

Casey sighed and flipped idly through her Cosmo. "Of course not."

"Okay. Good." He nodded and then stood there awkwardly for a moment. "But, it seems like we're fighting."

"Wouldn't you _know_ if you were fighting with someone, Derek?" Casey asked, finally sending him an agitated look over the magazine, "Wouldn't it be kind of obvious?"

"Uh…"

"Ugh, could you just leave me alone, please? I'm trying to read."

That was bitchy, she knew that. And, also kind of silly since she was taking some inane quiz on how sexy of a driver she was. _Why do I even read this crap?_

She glanced up absently and then noticed he was still there. Staring at her.

"_What?_"

"I haven't seen you in two days. Thought I might say 'hi' or something, instead of playing hide-and-seek, or whatever's going on here."

"Well, 'hi'," she said snottily.

"Why do always have to act like a such a baby?"

He stepped through the doorway and Casey refused to look at him, because he looked damn good tonight, it was so damn annoying.

"Is this about tonight? About Katie?"

Her eyes widened and she was actually pretty shocked he had asked her that outright. She arched a brow as if to say, '_Are you really going there?'_

"Pfft. No. I honestly couldn't care less that our little lazertag 'play date' was canceled. I mean, what are you, twelve?"

His mouth twitched, his lips shifting almost imperceptibly sideways. Most people would have missed that, but she'd seen that look before, and she knew she'd hit a nerve. And, that was fabulous as far she was concerned, because he had struck her nerve a long time ago.

"And, what are you doing instead?" he asked tightly, "Painting each other's toe nails and writing equations about unfull your social life is?"

"You can't even _spell_ equation," she said, dropping her magazine and outright glaring at him now, "And, pretty much anything we could drudge up would be more satisfying than having spent the night with you."

"Satisfying," Derek repeated, his eyes hardening, "And, what would you know about satisfaction? You're so freaking repressed and overworked and overstressed."

"What? So now I'm 'repressed' because I don't stroll around like an asshole with a belt buckle that says 'Cocky' on it?"

Derek straightened, and hooked his thumbs in his belt loops, parting his sportscoat at his hips. "Josh gave that to me," he said, and she rolled her eyes because obviously she couldn't saying anything about the buckle now.

So she focused on the wearer instead.

"Josh is a teenager, Derek. What's your excuse?"

"I don't need an excuse. Because I'm a grown man. And, I wear what I want, I do what I want, and I spend my time with _whoever _I want."

Ouch? Much.

"Then please," she hissed, "Don't let me waste anymore of your 'scoring' time. And feel free to let the door kick you in your scrawny ass on the way out."

His look was smoldering, his eyes shaking with frustration, before he left, slamming the door behind him.

She didn't care.

She didn't freaking care.

***

She cared so little that she couldn't get any sleep. It wasn't because she was waiting up for him, she told her self, or because she couldn't stop thinking about him being out with Katie, and touching Katie, and letting _Katie _undo his stupid 'Cocky' belt buckle. No, not at all.

_Ugh. _How could a man agitate her so much when he wasn't even around?

She sighed and shifted on her pillow, finally finding a good spot, when she heard the front door open.

Derek.

And…

She listened.

Only Derek she decided after a few moments. That was a relief, not that she really cared or anything, of course.

There was some more banging and muttering, the usual careless sounds Derek made whenever he entered the house--no matter what the hour. She sighed and rolled unto her back as he climbed the steps, her eyes shut, but her mind open.

Then her door was open and she jerked up slightly, squinting.

"Derek?" she rasped.

She heard him sigh deeply, like he couldn't decide something, before he opened it all the way, letting light creep into her bedroom, and closed it behind him.

"Move over," he ordered.

She hissed at him, "No."

She was still tense, angry. But when he dropped rudely on the bed anyway, his back slapping the mattress (for only god knows what reason), she didn't stop him. Part of her mind admitted that she was glad he was there, solid, and not somewhere else.

"We only made out."

She inhaled sharply, her shoulders stiffening, but the rest of her motionless as she lay there.

"Casey," he said after a moment, his voice lowering again, "Tonight I…I uh-"

"Okay, so you know what?" Casey finally said, cutting him off, and turning tiredly on her side away from him, "I'm really not in the mood for some epic recount of your gropings right now, Derek. I'm tired and I need sleep."

She hadn't meant for it to come out so snappy and agitated. But, honestly, that was how she felt. Why in the world did he deem it necessary to sneak into her room, and tell her all this stuff like she didn't already have his many escapades etched nauseatingly in her mind?

She heard him grunt slightly, put off. "That's not even what I was gonna say."

She ignored him.

She wasn't sure whether she wanted him to leave or to stay.

The bed dipped and he shifted with her, fabric rustling as he turned on his side behind her

"What's wrong with you?" he whispered. She felt the pad of his thumb brush hesitantly by her elbow, then his palm. The he smoothed it out to slide up her bicep, to her bare shoulder, squeezing.

"Talk to me."

She shivered slightly and her brain wrestled with her body for a full five seconds, before she pulled away from him.

"Case-"

"I'm really pissed that you messed up the day," she blurted out without thinking. Derek's eyebrows hopped, and yeah, she was a little surprised, too. She hadn't exactly planned on admitting that."Like I didn't put a stupid smiley face on the calendar and everything."

"I'm sorry," he said instantly, "I am."

"Whatever. The Derek ho-train takes off again."

That was mean. And, honestly, she didn't even think about Katie that way. She was just…frustrated.

"That's not fair," he said tightly, "I asked you if it was okay or not, and you said you didn't care. That you thought it was stupid."

"No, I thought you were stupid…_Stupid_."

Apparently he saw through her childish insult because he sighed, and then reached for her shoulder again. But, she pulled from him. "Stop it; don't touch me right now."

His jaw twitched. "What, is there a time limit or something? A buzzer that goes off?"

"Yeah, why don't you go hold your breath and wait for the 'ding'?"

"God, you're so frustrating," he whispered harshly.

"No, you're frustrating."

He glowered, but then his body shifted towards her, and he reached out to her again. Casey huffed and instantly resisted him.

"Fine," he finally grumbled.

"_Fine_," she mimicked like a two year old, but she didn't care.

He grunted gruffly and turned from her, lying flat on his back.

She sighed and turned from him, too, burying her face in her pillow.

He didn't leave.

Which was odd.

She didn't make him.

Which was probably even odder.

***

The next morning was weird, and she didn't really want to think about it. Instead she reached over Derek's snoring body for the alarm and hit 'off.'

_What the hell?_, was all she could ask herself.

They hadn't touched or anything. They hadn't talked. Hell, as far she could tell they'd both still been pretty aggravated with each other when they'd fallen asleep. But, ugh…nothing made any sense anymore.

Not to mention the fact that it had been annoyingly comforting, him lying there beside her--even if she was upset. And, after the initial steam had worn off, she'd slept really, really well.

She sighed and rubbed at her forehead, trying to pretended that she hadn't actually just hosted a sleepover with Derek. But there he was. Lying there, with his stupid, oblivious, blank face. His mouth was parted, his face open and smooth, totally undistressed.

She rolled her eyes and then stared at him for a moment.

Her eyes gentled. He really did look peaceful when he slept…

"Ah, stop it," she hissed at herself.

She huffed and tore the blankets off of herself, escaping from the bed. This wasn't normal, and she was determined to get as far from not-normal as she possibly could.

*****

"…so then his heart rate dropped and he lost consciousness; it was so exciting!" Kellie was saying, her hands gesticulating as they reached the parking lot.

Casey shook her head as she grabbed her car keys. "That's really fabulous for you, Kellie."

"What?" she asked defensively, "He was okay…you know, after a while."

"Anyway," Kellie said, talking over Casey's skeptical look, "After it was all over, Steinmetz looked at me, smiled--almost, kind of, sort of--and patted my back. I got a back pat!"

Casey laughed softly, bemused, as she always was with Kellie, but genuinely happy for her. "Congratulations."

"Thanks; feel's good to finally get my dramatic, Meredith Grey like movement." She shrugged. "Plus, Monica burst into tears, so it made me look even better."

"Your compassion is so deep; it must literally be a burden for you," Casey said sarcastically.

"Yeah, yeah, wonka wonka," Kellie said, waving her off, "I'll see you, tomorrow, 'kay, babe?"

"Bright and early." Casey said with a big, fake grin.

Kellie smirked and headed off to her own car, and Casey sighed before unlocking the Prius. Getting in the car meant she had to go home. Going home met something unknown, but probably awkward.

She sucked it up, tossed her bag in the passenger seat, turned her key…and nothing. "Okay," she muttered, "That's…different."

She squinted and glanced at her gas tank. Full. She shrugged and turned her key and--surprise--nothing. "Right, because today just hasn't been frustrating enough."

****

"Teddy," Casey whined, sulking into the break room.

Teddy glanced up from his magazine--something stupid about cars and girls--and he frowned, sitting up. "What's up? You got serious face."

She sighed. As annoying as Teddy could be, he was generally pretty dependable and (somewhat) mature when she needed him.

"My car won't start."

He shrugged. "Did you try the keys?"

"Yes," she said slowly, warningly.

"Ehh," He smiled sheepishly, "Sorry, Case. That's all I got."

"That's it?" she asked, incredulous, "You're supposed to be a guy. And, you read all those stupid car magazines all the time."

"I read them for the shiny paint and the babes," he said honestly. "Plus, have you seen these hands?" He lifted them up as if to demonstrate, "I don't keep 'em this smooth and beautiful from using tools."

Derek had rough hands, Casey thought glumly. And, because he'd refused for so long to get rid of the Prince, he'd learned a lot about cars. Rationally, she knew she should probably just call him and stop wasting time with Teddy. But, she was pretty keen on avoiding that whole post-sleepover awkwardness.

"Ugh," she sighed, "Thanks, Ted. I'll just call my stepbrother."

"You sure?" he offered with a shrug, "I could like…fiddle around or something. I know how to change wiper fluid…?"

"Tempting, but I'll pass."

***

She texted Derek, which she thought was a very adult, and very practical compromise. He sent a few more texts back to her, asking annoying, confusing questions about car batteries and engines that she couldn't understand, until he finally wrote: "_nvrmd. B there n a sec_."

'B there n a sec' apparently meant more like a half-hour. But, she knew he was busy, and probably had to cancel a few meetings to get there, so she didn't complain.

She was leaning over the counter ledge of one of the nurses' stations when she felt a not-so-subtle arm slip around her. "Lost in endless fantasies about me?" Dan asked, stealing her from her thoughts.

Casey just sighed, too tired to shrug him off. "Wow, Dan," she said sarcastically, "How'd you guess?"

"I just have a knack for these things."

"Mmmhmm," she mumbled absently.

"I'm still available for next weekend," he said suggestively, "If you've finally come arou-"

"Casey?"

She straightened, and then turned instantly away from Dan at Derek's questioning voice. Apparently, he'd snuck up on her somewhere between her musings and Dan's obnoxiousness.

"Oh, Derek, hey," she said sheepishly, "You're here."

"Yeah, I'm here," he mumbled slowly, looking between her and Dan.

Dan smirked and tilted his head towards Derek. "Yo, Case? Who's the Abercrombie and Fitch model?"

"I'm her stepbrother," Derek said, and Casey's widened because she'd never actually heard his tone get like this outside the rink, "Who the heck are you?"

There was a tense beat, Dan's smirk slipping as he read Derek's warning glare.

"Uh….dude, chillax," Dan said casually, although his arm left her shoulders quickly, and the opposite of casually, "I'm just her coworker….Dan," he added after a moment.

"Dan, huh?"

Casey sighed, because she could literally see Derek's mind working, could see him putting together all the times she'd mentioned Dan, that 'hot, but arrogant guy' who was always hitting on her at work.

"Well," Dan said awkwardly, slipping away, "This has been, well 'fun's' not _quite _the right word." He sent Casey a bemused look, "Later, Case."

"Later," she quietly, warily as Derek walked towards her.

"Does he always look at you like that?"

"Derek," she sighed.

"I know that look," Derek said tightly, "And, I don't want _him_ looking at you with that look."

"What is wrong with you?" She asked, scrunching her face as he walked stiffly with her towards the exit, "You're acting like a crazy person."

But, he ignored her and hissed instead. "What, are you in to him or something?"

She bristled. "Why would you even ask me that?"

"Well, excuse me for trying to find some vaguely reasonable explanation for why'd you skip around letting him undress you with his eyes and put his pervy hands all over you."

"First of all, Dan is not pervy," (okay, so that was kind of a lie), "He's my friend. Read: _friend_. There's nothing going on between us, as I so blatantly say every time I bring up his name. And, secondly, where do you get off patrolling my love life?"

"Love life?" he repeated with an arched brow, "If he's just a friend, why is it a 'love life' all of sudden?"

"Fine, you're right, Derek; you got me," she said, her voice dripping with sarcasm, "Dan and I are secret lovers, screwing each other in the break room on our time off."

"That's not funny," he growled at her, ripping the door open. "I mean, ugh, the way he was looking at you."

"Derek," she said again, and this time she gripped his arm, stopping him, "You do realize I'm a grown woman, right? That pretty much every where I go until the apocalypse there's gonna be at least one smarmy guy checking me out, right?"

"But, you're, you're my," He was tripping over his words all of sudden, "You're my stepsister."

"Okay, fine, and this all very sweet and overprotective. But, seriously, cut it out."

He grunted and brushed an agitated hand through his hair, which, no she wasn't staring at, and glowered. "Where's the stupid car?"

"No one forced you to come out here, Derek," she said, rolling her eyes, "I told you I could just get a mechanic or something."

"With what? All that stored up money you got? And, I'm good with cars, okay, so let me see it."

She huffed and started marching quickly to the Prius, Derek on her heels behind her.

"It's probably your battery," he mumbled, "I brought my charger, just in case."

She folded her arms over her chest, protectively, because he was being kind now and that always made it a lot harder for her to be frustrated with him. She muttered, "Alright."

"Although you weren't very specific or remotely helpful in your texts." He rolled his eyes as they approached the car, "I don't know why you didn't just call me on the phone, like a normal person."

"Well, you didn't call me either."

_Yeah, pretty solid argument there_, _Case_, she thought sarcastically.

Derek looked equally unimpressed as he gestured to her car. "Could you open the hood?"

She looked at him oddly, because they were standing right next to each other. But she didn't question him, her fingers fumbling at the front of the car, searching for that annoying little knob she could never, ever find.

She heard him sigh beside her, his mouth fighting off a twitch as he watched her. "You gotta unlock it first, Spacey. There should be a lever, you know, inside the car; like for your gas tank…?"

"Oh." She flushed sheepishly, "Right."

"Right," he repeated, staring at her.

She cleared her throat and hurried to the driver's side, opening the door. It took her a few clueless moments (and she could feel Derek staring impatiently at her through the windshield,) before she finally found the lever. She tugged at it and poked her head out the window. "Got it."

He sent her a sarcastic thumbs up, and she rolled her eyes, and climbed back out of the car.

"What's wrong with it?" she asked instantly, "Can you fix it?"

Derek sighed and slipped his hand under the hood, finding the knob. "You'll have to excuse me for a moment. My x-ray vision's a bit off today; so I'm gonna need to actually _open the hood_ to see what's going on down there."

She huffed and pulled a face at him, and he pulled his own face back as he lifted it open with one hand. He grumbled and he propped it open with the stand, "Or maybe 'Danny boy' could do it better for you. If he even knows the first thing about a car."

"I don't know, Derek," she said sarcastically, crossing her arms, "Why don't you go inside and having a wrestling match, to see who's 'manlier'?"

His jaw flexed and he stiffened, glaring at her.

"And, for the last time, there is nothing going between us, you big, giant, freak."

"Promise?" he asked gruffly, his head lowered and hidden from her under the hood.

Promise? What the hell was this, a pinky swear? But, she rolled her eyes, willing to play insane with him if it would calm him down, take the hardness out of his gaze.

"Promise," she said tiredly.

"S'good," he mumbled and she noticed some of the stiffness leave his voice, which relaxed her, too.

"Well?" she asked after a minute or so, "Should we call a mechanic or wh-"

"Your battery's corroding, See that bluish, green gunk?" Derek said, pointing to the top of her battery.

"Um," Casey leaned over next to him, her nose scrunching, "Yeah?"

"That's bad," he said simply, although not condescendingly over his shoulder.

She groaned. She didn't want bad. She wanted good. She wanted good and she wanted it fixed, so she could go home and take the nap to end all naps.

"It's nothing serious," Derek said with a shrug, "Used to happen to the Prince all the time. Why don't you take my car home; get some sleep? I'll walk across the street to the gas station, and fix it for you, okay?"

He shut her hood smoothly and she nearly got whiplash from her flash of emotions. Because minutes ago she'd wanted to strangle him, and now…well, suffice to say he could be so sweet sometimes it didn't make any sense.

"I don't mind waiting."

He shrugged. "Whatever."

***

At the gas station he bought what he needed as well as a candy bar for her--a peace offering. Which meant squat as far she was concerned, because she'd stopped being mad at him the second he'd opened the hood of the car. She took it anyway, because Derek didn't do words, he did actions; many of them incomprehensible and frustrating as all hell, but some incredibly sweet.

Then he shrugged off his coat and rolled up his sleeves, so he could really show her through action, and her stomach ached. Partly from how_ Derek _he was, and partly because she didn't understand why she was suddenly noticing just how_ Derek _he was.

She stood close to him as he lifted the hood again, and tried to express affection through her actions, too, rubbing gently at the small off his back.

"That's, that's distracting," he mumbled, pulling away slightly, but not meanly.

"Oh, sorry."

"S'no problem." He nodded to his left, "Pass me the coke?"

She reached into the plastic back, handed it to him, and watched curiously.

"Derek, this doesn't seem quite…sane," she said warily.

"Trust me; it works. I don't know why, but it works. Done it half a dozen times."

He undid the cap, leaned in and held the bottle gingerly over the battery.

"Well." Casey chewed at her bottom lip, thoughtfully. "I suppose all the carbonic acid could have a reaction with the metallic oxides and-"

There was a light fizzing, and the gunk went away.

"Yeah," she said sheepishly off Derek's bemused smirk, "Pretty much that."

"Riiight."

He grabbed a bottle of water and spilled some over it, scrubbing off the residue with the sleeve of his shirt. Casey's face twisted, but she didn't comment.

"Now," said Derek, "The fun part."

He bent over lifted the battery charger with a grunt, setting it on a flat surface under the hood. Casey furrowed her eyebrows and watched attentively as he clicked it on and unwound the jumper cables. Flashes of chemistry and advanced physics ran through her mind and her eyes lit.

"Hey, you think I could try?" she asked him.

Her eager hands were on the charger before he could protest, and Derek smirked stepping away. "Please," he said dryly, "Help yourself."

"Trust me, I will," she mumbled.

"You want my help?" she heard him ask from over her shoulder, "Or do you wanna blow up your car?"

"Sounds exciting, but I'll pass." She kept her gaze on the jumper cables, glancing between the charge signs on the battery and the charger pack. "Alright," she said, "What do I do?"

"Okay, take the red thingy…and clamp it on the plus sign."

"The positive terminal," she said.

"Right, whatever. Now, take the black thingy and clamp it on something metal besides the battery; like that bolt."

"So the current will ground out."

"Yeah, whatever."

She reached to clamp it when she felt Derek lean behind her, his hand covering hers, "But, careful, 'cause it might spark a little."

He smelled really good. But, that was distracting, so she ignored it.

She clamped the cable to a bolt and turned back to him, expectantly. "That was kind of anticlimactic."

He smirked. "That's because you have to start the car, Spacey. How'd you even it get a degree?"

She shrugged and walked past him towards the driver's side. But not before socking the back of his knee, making him grunt and bend helplessly. "_Ooomph_."

"My superior knowledge of the human body," she answered impishly.

Derek grunted as she started the ignition. "I can't believe I still fall for that."

"Me neither."

***


	6. Chapter 6

**Okay, so I was literally BLOWN AWAY by all your feedback. It was really, really kind of you all to leave so many, detailed reviews. It's always nice to know people appreciate your writing, and I definitely appreciate all your feedback :) Also, I really apologize for all the typos (especially last chapter). I have a horrible eye for detail, but I'll try to better proof this part.**

**Anyway, possible errors aside, I hope you enjoy :)**

***

**Mo Mo's From Mars, Spacey's From Venus, Part 5**

***

She opened the front door and, this time, was smart enough to duck the oncoming foam ball. "De-rek!" She cried out (but, mostly just for fun), and neither of the boys seemed too rattled by it.

She shifted the files in her arms, bumped the front door shut behind her, and used her best parental voice: "What did I tell you two about playing ball in the house?"

"Uh," Josh looked to Derek and shrugged, "…don't?"

"Good job," she said dryly, "Now try actually listening for once."

"Hey, did we order pizza?"

Casey's eyes widened as Ralph walked out from the kitchen, a bowl of snacks in hand, and wearing a t-shirt that read, "Babe Inspector." She sent Derek a look as if to say, _'This is what you call a positive influence?'_

But, he just shrugged and smiled sheepishly at her.

"Sir Casey Ma'am," Ralph said, bowing dramatically, "What a pleasure to remake your acquaintance again."

She squinted and kicked her shoes off, one at a time. "Um…what?"

"Princess Bride," Derek said, "He watched it twice in a row."

"Ohhhh."

That _almost_ made normal people sense.

"And, I did all my homework," Josh said, beaming up at her, "Don't you think that deserves maybe…a kiss?"

"That kid's smooth," Ralph stage whispered to Derek.

"Yeah, well, I taught him that move," Derek said, exchanging an amused look with Casey across the room.

Casey rolled her eyes, but then smiled sweetly at the teenager. "Maybe in ten years, sweetie."

"Ah, man," Josh groaned.

"But, for now, in this decade, can someone help me with my stuff, please?" Her chin dipped, gesturing pointedly, and a little impatiently, at the stack of files and bags she was juggling. Both boys straightened and hurried over.

"Got it," they said in unison.

She blinked, and a few moments and several arms and hands later, her burden disappeared. Derek set her files neatly on a stand, and Josh dumped her bag on the floor beside the steps (which was ridiculous, but she let it go).

"Than--_ooh_!" Another ball smacked her in the forehead, and she gasped, glaring at a sheepish Ralph. "Ralph," she whined, exasperated, "Are you serious?"

"Sorry. I have bad hand-eye-coordination. That's why I could never do hockey or rhythmic gymnastics."

"Oh, shame of shames," Derek said dryly, moving to help Casey out of her coat.

She sent him a surprised, yet not unpleased glance, before extending her other arm to help him slip it off for her. "I need to ask you a favor," he whispered in her ear.

Her eyes narrowed. "Of course you do."

Josh and Ralph were chasing each other in the living room, throwing beach balls and pillows, and Casey followed with tired eyes until Derek said, "You look nice today."

"No, I don't. I have food in my hair and some kid threw up on me. Twice."

Derek's face scrunched as he glanced down at the faded stain on her scrubs. "Uhm, yeah, so I was lying, you look god awful." Casey rolled her eyes, "But, I need some geek advice."

"Geek advice?" Her face scrunched, and she wavered between feeling annoyed and curious. Finally, her inquisitive nature won out, "What's that supposed to mean?"

"It's Josh." He glanced over his shoulder. Josh and Ralph were still being ridiculous, so he grasped her elbow and turned them away so only they could hear each other, "His grades picked up, but he's really struggling in chemistry. I already yelled at him and made him do laps, but that didn't help…"

"Shocking," she said dryly.

"Plus, I think he's actually trying." His voice lowered to that soft hush he used when he was serious, "I don't know how he's gonna pass this year, let alone qualify for any athletic scholarships if he can't get his G.P.A. up. I mean seriously, this kid's making me look a like a keener."

Casey squinted at him, watched as he ran a frustrated hand through his hair. She'd always heard Derek complain about Josh, about his grades or his antics. But, it had always been about winning, how he and the team couldn't win because Josh had messed up. But, now it had nothing to do with a game score or face off percentages. He was honestly and genuinely concerned about him.

"You gotta help."

Casey sighed, her nose scrunching. She didn't want to say 'no'; she really didn't. But, if there was one thing she didn't have lately, it was spare time. Derek seemed to read the thoughts on her face before she even spoke them, because he shook his head. "Case, come on."

"Ugh, Derek." She glanced reluctantly over his shoulder at Josh, who had Ralph in a head lock in front of the television. "I have zero time. Scratch that: I have negative 100 to the 100th power free time. Or, oh wait…" She paused, worrying her lip, as she often did when she was thinking. "That actually wouldn't make any sense, because if the exponent's positive the number will be positive. So, I guess it would be more like-"

"That's _exactly_ my point, woman," he said, cutting her off. "No one on this planet is nerdier than you are, and there's pretty much no one else he'd put up with tutoring him for more than five minutes. I mean, I can barely get him to sit down and do his homework half the time."

"Derek…"

"_Please_?"

He ducked his head towards her, so she was eye level with those painfully persuasive brown eyes. "What exactly are you trying to do here?" she whispered to him.

He smirked. "Puppy dog eye my way into a 'yes'?"

_Meh_, at least he was honest.

"Fine; I'll do it for Josh," she said lowly, like it was the most annoying thing in the world to her (which it wasn't; which again, he probably knew). "But, that's not always going to work."

"Heh, well see about that…"

"And, you owe me. So much now, it's ridiculous."

"Sweet." Derek lifted up his hand, a solemn Venturi vow, "You have a blank check on return-favors."

"And, you better believe I'm cashing that sucker," she whispered to him.

She yelped and then they both ducked instinctively as another ball bulleted over their heads. "Ralph!" they cried at once.

"I told you! I have a coordination problem."

"That's not the only problem you have," Derek said with an eye roll.

Casey scowled and smacked his chest with the back of her._ 'That may be true, but that's not particularly nice to point out, Derek,_' her eyes lectured him. But, again, he just shrugged.

Ralph dropped his other foam ball and grinned, oblivious, "So what's for dinner?"

"Oh, Ralphy."

She sighed, her face scrunching with fatigue, and she felt Derek squeeze her shoulder, pulling her against him. "Dinner's takeout."

"Awww," Ralph whined, and he really did look like his entire world was crumbling before him. "But, she promised me a home cooked meal."

"And, you promised me forty bucks last week. But, I guess I won't be getting that either, huh?"

That seemed to shut him up, and Casey whispered a quick 'thank you' to Derek before letting her head rest gratefully against his chest.

***

She rode with him to the Chinese restaurant even though she was exhausted. They didn't see each other often, and it was weird but she'd been missing him more and more at work.

"The team's heading out of town again in a couple of weeks," Derek mumbled as they stopped at the light, "Hopefully, if Josh passes this chemistry test…"

"When he passes," Casey said tiredly, but insistently.

Derek's lips tilted as he glanced over at her. "Right, 'when' he passes, he'll able to join us."

Casey sighed and then swallowed a feisty yawn as her head fell back against the headrest. "I'm gonna have to literally pull a magic trick outta my ass to work this out though."

"I have a rigged card deck, if it helps."

He arched a playful brow at her and Casey smiled softly at him as he pressed the gas and the car rolled on.

"Thanks," she heard Derek say more seriously (her eyelids kept yanking themselves down), "It means a lot."

"Pfft. Like he'll really care," Casey said, rolling her eyes, "He'll just be happy if I wear a tight shirt when I tutor him."

"Heh, true. But, I sort of meant me. You know, that it will mean a lot to…or whatever."

He cleared his throat and she didn't look at him. Didn't even peek. Because it was like wrestling an angry, rabid, tiger for Derek to say things like this, and her usual mushy, wide-eyed looks never seemed to encourage the habit.

So, with discipline she smiled at the glove department instead. "S'no problem."

Another stoplight and Casey remembered why Derek hated ordering from this restaurant. The food was mind blowing, but it always took too long and too many slow, patience trying stoplights to get there.

Derek grunted and pressed the brakes.

Casey shifted in her seat, moving awkwardly against the pinch of the seat belt. Then she slipped her hand through the space between his chest and his arm, and tucked her head in the crook of his neck.

He didn't shrug away or tense up, like he often did. But she wasn't surprised. They'd been touching each other a lot more lately.

Mostly him, because he hadn't really before. She on the other hand, had always expressed affection through physicality, which is what made his shift feel so affirming and comforting for her.

She didn't always want a free meal, or her car fixed (although, she did appreciate all those things). Sometimes, all she really wanted was a hug, or a kiss on the cheek, or a shoulder she could trust when she felt tired, or alone.

And, Derek as supportive and (often accidentally) sweet as he'd been to her, had never really given that to her. Not until now.

"Tired?" he asked her.

"Mmmhmm."

She closed her eyes and shifted closer to him, and she could hear him sigh slightly. "You didn't have to come."

"I know," she mumbled, "But, I never see you anymore."

She was always more honest, more straightforward when she was tired. For better or for worst.

***

At diner Casey felt more at home in the house than she had in months. Everything was a mess, they were eating fast food at the last minute, and the house was crowded with a somewhat annoying, but mostly comforting noise.

Despite her many protests they'd settled in the living room (Josh calling her a mom again had expedited the process). Ralph had taken over an arm chair, Josh--in a spectacular show of mercy--was allowed to sit in Derek's thrown, and she and Derek were sharing the couch.

"This chicken tastes funny," Ralph said, frowning at his plate.

Casey and Derek rolled their eyes simultaneously. "That's because it's tofu, Ralphy," Derek said.

"And, it's very healthy for you. It gives you all the protein you need and…"

Ralph spit up the tofu onto his plate, and Casey suddenly lost all her motivation to explain it to him. As well as, momentarily, her appetite.

"My sentiments exactly," Derek said with a smirk.

"Ugh, men are so disgusting."

"It's part of our charm," Derek said sarcastically, letting teriyaki sauce smudge his lips.

Okay, so she hadn't been staring at his lips before, but now she was definitely was. And, she wasn't sure whether that was part of his point, the whole of his point, or there was no point--because he was Derek and his middle name was ambiguous.

Her thumb itched, and she'd halfway convinced herself to brush the sauce from his lips when Ralph said from behind her, "So you score yet?"

"What?" "Excuse me?" Derek and Casey asked at once. They glanced at each other, squinting.

"You know, with Krystal or Carly or whatever. Did you…" Off Casey's very sharp glare between him and Josh, Ralph amended, "Score a very chaste kiss on the cheek?"

Josh rolled his eyes, because he wasn't a toddler (pretty much the only demographic that would fall for that), and Derek frowned, brushing the sauce away with his hand.

"It's Katie," he said lowly, "And, uh, no…it didn't quite work out."

"Shot down again, huh, Coach?" Josh said sympathetically.

Derek tensed instantly and Casey rolled her eyes. "No. I just wasn't that in to her is all. There was no, you know, chemistry."

"Wait, what?" Casey dropped her chopsticks on her plate, her mind catching up with what he was saying, "You broke up with Katie?"

He shifted, and his eyes flashed uncomfortably. "Breaking up's a bit strong of a word, Case. I mean, we were barely dating."

"I know, but, it's kind a weird you didn't mention it, or anything."

"Heh, what are we, BFFs?" he asked, glancing self consciously at Ralph and Josh.

Yes, Casey thought petulantly. Sure, they didn't braid each other's hair and wear matching bracelets, but Derek had become one of her closest friends (or 'acquaintances' as he'd so ineloquently put it). What was the sudden freezeout on secrets about?

He sent her a look, as if to say 'let it go,the guys are here," and she rolled her eyes, but didn't persist.

"I'm a dude, Case," he said, playing it up even more, "We don't talk about these kind of things."

That little liar. They'd talked on the phone everyday for a week after he'd broken up with Rebecca.

"I don't know, man," Ralph said, still shaking his head, "I can't believe you past that up. She was all over you. That's not chemistry; that's science."

"I…I don't even understand what that means," Derek said blankly.

"It means what's up with you, Coach D? I thought you were supposed to be the Mack back in your day?"

"Not 'back in my day'. It's still my day. I'm still the Mack."

Josh looked incredulous and Casey could feel Derek tensing even more beside her, indignant. She reached over and rubbed soothingly by his knee. "You're still the Mack," she said calmingly.

"Um, thanks," she heard him murmur quietly, although her attention was pinned back to the lomein.

"That doesn't count," Josh said, "She's your stepsis; she has to say that. If you really wanna be the Mack again, you gotta man up, get back in game."

Casey watched with exasperation as Derek nodded slowly, like he was actually, genuinely taking advice from a 14 year old.

"That is…yeah," Ralph said, nodding thoughtfully, "Pretty decent advice."

She rolled her eyes, but settled for biting into egg roll rather than enter this testosterone fest. It would be a losing battle and it's not like any of them would care what she, an actual woman, thought about-

"What do you think, Case?" Derek asked. Her eyes widened slightly as she turned towards him on the coach, "About me getting back in there?"

"Um…" Her tongue was a little twisted. "That's, um, good, I guess-?"

"Dude, who cares?" Ralph interjected. His eyes flickered to Casey apologetically, "No offense. But, she's a chick. What does she know about chicks?"

"She's not a 'chick'; she's my stepsister. Get it right," Derek said tightly. Which again, shut up Ralph. Which again, she appreciated.

She glanced over at him and his mouth parted, shifting again, like he was really irritated about something.

"What's wrong?" Casey whispered.

"S'nothing." His shoulders slanted away from her and he muttered, "I don't get you."

Her face scrunched. "Don't get what?"

He didn't answer, but instead shoved an entire egg roll into his mouth, and Casey rolled her eyes. He often used the 'full-mouth decoy' when he wanted to avoid talking about something. She sent him one last prying look, which he ignored, before she sighed and went back to her food.

**

Derek was pretty cold towards her for the rest of the night. Not necessarily mean, or agitated, just...closed off. She'd tried to perk him up for a little while with smiles, and shoulder bumps, and (in one moment of desperation) a knock-knock joke. Every time he answered with that empty, blank look she hated, and eventually she'd given up. She swore it was like he had a period sometimes.

She was digging into a pint of ice cream, pushing off sleep and another day's work, when Derek sauntered into the kitchen.

He looked surprised to see her there. Her mouth parted, because she was surprised to see him, too. Mostly because he was shirtless, his boxer pants hanging low on his hips in a way he didn't usually stroll around the house when she there.

His voice soft, uncharacteristically self conscious as he reached the fridge. "Hey."

"Hey," she said blankly.

Her spoon was dangling in front of her mouth, and then she reminded herself that staring wasn't polite (no matter how suddenly hot your stepbrother was looking to you) and ducked her head back towards her ice cream.

She felt his gaze on her and her neck flushed and--crap, this really had to stop.

As far as she was concerned, sex had never been an issue between them. He'd always been attractive. She'd always noticed. But, it'd never gone further than that; never really crossed her mind more than a few fleeting thoughts about his hair, or his abs, or his calves. He was her stepbrother. That was a boundary (and she loved boundaries), so it was all a moot point. Plus, the fact that Derek had been a genuine ass for the first few years she'd known him had made it a lot easier to disregard his looks.

But, he'd gotten even more attractive over the years, with all the weightlifting and training, and those others intangible ways a man developed with age. More importantly, they'd become mentally and emotionally much more intimate, which only seemed to accentuate his physical attractiveness. Not to mention his hands. Which were strong, and rough, and skilled, and felt really, really good on her skin. And, his eyes, and they way he'd look her sometimes…

She loved his eyes.

The rational part of her brain knew that she should probably sit down and think this through, just admit that she was growing more and more attracted to the man she was living with.

But, then her mind always hit this solid, concrete wall.

Because no outcome was desirable.

She could tell him what she was feeling, and he could look at her like she some psycho, stalker stepsister and scurry away.

She could tell him what she was feeling, and he could (and she tried to not dwell on this thought) feel the same way and…and then what? They go live on a farm in Arkansas?

There was no 'then'. There was no 'what'. He was her stepbrother. And, that was a concrete wall she didn't see moving anytime soon.

Besides, Derek (who thrived so much on taking control and initiative it was ridiculous) hadn't brought any thing up to her. Which probably meant…well, she wasn't sure what it meant. But, if he wasn't going to acknowledge it, she wasn't in any rush to either.

Chair legs screeched beside her, dragging her from her thoughts as Derek scooted next her at the island. He dug his own spoon into the pint before she could protest.

Casey arched her brow at him. This was her Cookie Dough. "Since when do we share?"

"Since you have what I want."

"You don't always get what you want, Derek," she said, sliding the carton away from him protectively.

His spoon made a half-hearted jab, and then he sighed and rolled his eyes.

"Plus, you've been so moody tonight. What's up with you?"

"For the last time, nothing," Derek said with a huff. "I'm a dude. Sometimes I don't feel like chattering and gossiping with you for hours on end. Now let me have some," he mumbled.

She slid the carton over tiredly, because of course she was going to share. Nothing got in the way between Derek and food. Plus, she was secretly happy he'd finally thawed out and was talking to her again.

He took a bite of ice cream and she went to work on her side. "Sometimes I wonder why I'm friends with Ralph."

"Because you're both idiots," she said a-matter-of-factly.

Derek smirked at her, more amused than anything else. "Well, yeah, I guess there's that."

Casey shrugged. "And, he can be really fun and kind when he's not being completely ridiculous."

"Right. Whenever that is."

"Josh seems to like him."

She scraped a clump of dough from the side of the carton. Derek fought her with his spoon for a moment, before she whined, and he finally let her win.

"You're so girly," he mumbled.

"Yeah, well, that's what I'm going for."

She swallowed the scoop and then glanced back up at him, catching his eyes dropping to her tank. She squinted at him. "What?"

"S'nothing," he said, "Just…don't you think you're a little old for Mickey Mouse jammies?"

"You're never too old for Mickey Mouse jammies," she said indignantly, "And, this from the man wearing Oilers p.j.s with holes in them."

"Hey," Derek said, straightening instantly in his chair, "They won the…"

"Stanley Cup in four straight games that year, yadda yadda," she said, rolling her eyes.

"It was masterful."

"More like a master pain. You barely slept and didn't shave for weeks for good luck. Not that you could grow anything on that baby face of yours."

"Well, it worked, didn't it? And, it's not a baby face anymore."

_Definitely not_, she thought. There was really nothing 'baby' left about him. Except the way he'd whine and bitch when he didn't get his way. Or starve to death if she left home without feeding him for too long.

He took another scoop and she watched absently as his adam's apple bobbed up and down along his neck.

"Where are you right now?"

Her eyes darted confusedly to his face, to his curious eyes and his smirk.

"Um, what?"

"You're were totally spacing. And, you got.." he gestured vaguely at her face, "Fudge on your mouth."

"I knew that," she said petulantly, wiping at her chin.

She missed it apparently, because he reached over, lips tilted. His hand cradled her chin, brushing away the chocolate with his thumb and she was caught off guard by how tender it was.

He proceeded to wipe the smudge off onto his boxers, which was gross, yet kind of sweet of at the same time. She watched him and it struck her how caring he was in his own sloppy, rough sort of way. And, how good he made her feel. How he was always (barring some medical breakthrough) the highlight of her long, grueling days.

She was gifted with words, she gotten straight A's in English lit. But, she couldn't figure out how to express that to him.

"Um…thanks," she said dumbly instead.

Derek shrugged like it had been any other moment in any other day, and sneaked some more ice cream. "S'no problem."

***

"Okay," Casey said, setting the thick textbook between them on the dining room table, "Where are you struggling?"

When Josh just sat there, squinting between her and the book, she groaned. "Oh, god, I know that look. That's a 'Derek look'. Have you even seen this textbook before?"

"Eh, well, I've seen it…technically."

Casey sighed and sent Derek a scathing look over Josh's shoulder. But, he just shrugged and offered a sheepish grin.

"Refreshments," he said, setting a bowl of snacks and a pack of colas beside them, "This could take a while."

"Ahh, man," Josh whined, "What about practice?"

"You're not practicing until I see some progress."

Derek's face twisted as soon as the last word left his lips, and Casey could see the flashbacks of high school haunting him. He shook his head with another distasteful look, and Casey smirked.

"Okay, so I'm off to the rink," Derek said, "But you better not give her a hard time. And, you better get smarter. Or they'll be laps until you-"

"Derek," Casey hissed.

It was sweet he was concerned, but seriously, he really needed to learn another form of discipline.

"I got it from here," she finished more gently. Her smile wasn't gentle though. She knew he knew her looks, so she knew he got the message.

"Fine," Derek said slowly, "But call me if you need anything. Or he if does anything stup-"

_"Derek_."

"Right; right, I'm leaving."

Casey shook her head and Josh let out a relieved sigh, matching her own.

"Okay, sweetie," Casey said when the front door shut, "Did you pay _any_ attention during chemistry?"

"Well, a little." Josh shifted the Oilers cap sheepishly on his head, "This girl at school, Melanie. She, uh, lets me copy her notes."

Casey smiled, her eyes lighting amusedly, as she flipped the book open, "Should I be jealous?"

"Come, on, Casey." Josh held his hands out reassuringly, and yeah, he'd been spending _way_ too much time with Derek, "You know you're my main girl."

"Ah, okay, just making sure, stud."

She gave the lid of cap a quick tug, and he smirked, all puffed up. Casey fought the urge to roll her eyes and reached down, pulling up a case of files.

"What's all that?" Josh asked warily.

"An organized archive of all my grade school study guides." Josh's eyes bugged, but she ignored him as she rifled through them._ College, Senior year, Junior year, oh, there we go-_

She plucked out a worn, manila file and dropped it, with a thud, before him.

"Woah. Coach D was right; you are the Queen of Keeners."

"Hey," Casey cried, "That may be true. But, Keeners have feelings, too, alright? And, I happened to do extremely well in chemistry; it was one of my favorite subjects. Well…if I had to choose, I mean, they were all very exciting…" She trailed off at Josh's bored, blank look, his cheek resting listlessly in his palm. She cleared her throat, "Anyway, let's just start with the periodic table, 'kay?"

"Oh, yeaahh," Josh said, his eyes awakening slightly, "That big blocky thing Mel's always blabbing on about."

"Yeah." Casey grimaced slightly, "That."

***

When Derek came home he looked flustered, tired, an oddly like _her _when she returned from a long day's work. Casey frowned and sat up on the couch where she'd been flirting with a nap.

"Alright," Derek said curtly, shrugging off his coat, "What's the damage?"

She blinked, thought about questioning his mood, but then decided to hold off. "Well…let's just put it this way: if he were in a hospital, he'd be in intensive care. And, if there were anything more intensive than that…yeah, he'd be there."

"Oh, great," Derek groaned, "Just perfect."

"It should be fine though," she said softly, hesitantly as she watched him sulk into the living room. She bit her lip, forcing herself not to pry, as he plopped tiredly on the couch beside her. They both bounced a little and then settled against each other, her knee pressing into his thigh as his head fell back against the couch.

"Derek, what's wrong?"

Okay, so she tried at least.

He made a small, cranky sound. "I don't know what' s wrong me. I usually know right away what I want and I what I don't want."

"Is this is supposed to make any sense to me?"

He sighed. "It's Benson. They're pressing me to make a decision about next year. And, I…I just don't know."

His face creased with frustration and she leaned into him, her hands looping through his arm, and nested her chin on his shoulder. That seemed to relax him slightly, and his head titled to rest gently on hers. "Are you leaning in any direction?" she murmured.

He snorted. "Just the I-have-no-clue-what-to-do-with myself direction," he answered dryly. "Eh, I dunno. Part of me feels like it would it just be easier to stay here. I know the kids and the program. The job pays well enough. And, I wouldn't have to go through the hassle of getting a new place and decorating." He paused, scowling, "I hate decorating."

But, Casey was tangled up in another part of his rambling. "What do you mean, find a new place?"

His eyes flickered, and then finally shifted from where he'd been staring blankly ahead. "Well, obviously if I took the job, I'd have to move. If I stayed here I'd have to commute everyday."

"Well…" Casey stiffened slightly, and pulled away so she could face him, "That wouldn't be all that bad, would it?"

"Pfft, please. I can barely make it on time when I live down the street from the rink. Forget about an hour away."

"An hour away?" she repeated softly.

"Yeah."

He glanced over at her and their eyes caught for a moment, before she frowned and looked down.

"Oh," was all she could say.

The thought of him moving out and leaving her in the house made her gut twist. Some weeks she barely saw him as it was. She couldn't imagine how little they'd see each other if he moved to Benson. And an hour away was, well, _an hour away_ and she didn't like it.

Derek scrubbed the back of his head, and stared into his lap. "What do you think, Case?"

_Hell no_, she thought instantly. But, she didn't really have the right to feel that, let alone say that aloud. So instead she just sighed, ducking her head away. "Well, I uh…I have no idea, Derek. They both seem like good options."

"Gee, thanks," he said sarcastically. Her brows furrowed when she caught the agitation in his voice, "That's really damn 'helpful'."

She stiffened and moved from him so they weren't touching anymore. "Well, what the hell do you want me to say?"

"I don't know--nothing. I just…" His hands jumped agitatedly in front of him, "… I want you to have an opinion about _anything_ important I've asked you lately."

"Well, you don't even have opinions about them, so how can you expect me to?"

She huffed at him and even his face flushed as he glared back at her. Finally, he grunted, and turned his head away from her.

"Ugh, never mind. Let's not do this right now." He sighed. "Can you tutor Josh again tomorrow?"

Casey shook her head, her back turned towards him, too. "Only if he likes to see the inside of a hospital."

***

"Cool," Josh said as he jogged up to Casey at the nurse's station. His face lit up as his eyes sprinted about the corridor, "It's just like T.V. Except…" He frowned slightly, "Lamer."

"Yeah, that about sums it up."

Josh shrugged at her and Casey smiled before sharing a tense look with Derek. They hadn't spoken much since last night. And, they weren't fighting, not technically. They were just frustrated with each other. Casey wasn't even sure why, but she felt her body tense up every time he was in the same room.

"Hey, Derek."

"Hey," he mumbled.

She sighed and set her chart on the counter. "I can only tutor him for about an hour or, during my breaks. Then he's at the mercy of St. John's bizarre hospital staff."

Derek shrugged and Josh said, "That's cool. I can entertain myself."

Casey exchanged an wary look with Derek. "Yeah, 'bout that kiddo," Derek said, placing a firm hand on his shoulder, "You don't act up. You don't break anything. You don't bother her at all during her shift, or you're doing to laps until you-"

"Derek," she hissed.

He scowled at her, but conceded. "Just stay out of trouble, 'kay, Josh?"

"No prob, Coach."

Derek's shoulders stiffened, and Casey watched curiously as his gaze shifted over her shoulder. "Wha-"

"Hey, Drake, right?" She sighed and brace herself and Dan strolled up behind her. "Good to see you again, man."

"It's Derek," he answered tightly.

"Yeah, and I'm Josh. Who are you, lame wad?"

Casey would have laughed, watching the two of them glare in unison at Dan, if she wasn't getting such of a headache from it all.

"Lame wad?" Dan frowned, "That's a new one. Who's the munchkin, your other overprotective brother?"

"I'm her stepbrother," Derek said, his eyes watching Dan's proximity to her like a hawk, "And, no, we're not related; he's on my hockey team."

"Oh, you coach hockey, huh? I used to play some sports back in high school. Mostly tongue wrestling, but you know, a little basketball, too."

He laughed slightly. Then his eyes traveled over the set of unamused faces, and he trailed off.

"Riiight. Tough crowd."

Derek grunted. "Don't you have something better to do, like heal a patient or something?"

Dan nodded slowly, grabbing a folder from the counter behind her, and shifting away, "So, second time's _not_ the charm then."

"No, not at all," Derek said.

Casey rolled her eyes and grabbed Dan by the forearm before he could escape. "Could you do me a favor and show Josh to the break room? He's gonna be hanging out with us today."

"Sure, no problem, babe."

He glanced uncomfortably at the larger glaring male, before gesturing to the smaller glaring male. "Yeah, well, okay, let's go, champ."

"Don't call me champ," Josh said, glowering as he followed the exasperated Dan down the hall.

Casey watched them turn the corner along with Derek, and then glanced back at his agitated form.

"Why is he _always_ around you?" he asked instantly.

"He is not always around me."

"Well, he's been pretty damn 'around you' every time I've been here."

"Oh, yeah, and with this visit that would bring your grand total up to what…?" She pretended to do complex math on her fingers. " A whopping two times?"

"Yeah, well, I think I've seen enough." His hands bunched and flexed at his sides, like he couldn't decide what to do with them, "And, you say there's nothing going on with you two, but you've been acting all weird, and he-"

"I'm acting weird?" Casey said over him, her eyebrows spiking, "You have been the moodiest, most cryptic, most dodgiest guy ever, and_ I'm_ the one acting weird?"

"Ugh," she huffed and grabbed her clipboard off the counter, "I don't have time for this, I have to get to work."

"Right," Derek grumbled before she could even turn from him, " Maybe I should just go ahead and jam a fork into my head, and maybe then you'd have time to talk to me."

"Oh, yeah, that's really original, D. Let's have the whole, 'Casey works too much spat', because that's the one issue we _really_ just haven't beaten into the ground yet."

He bristled.

"And, every time I've tried talking to you lately, you've shut me out. I didn't even know about you and Katie until Ralph pried it out of you."

"I was going to tell you," he said lowly, "I was just…waiting for the right time."

"What do you mean the 'right time?' It's not like you were pregnant or something; there's no 'right time'; you just tell me, that's it."

"Well, it's not like you've been answering any of my questions lately."

"That's because I can't answer them. I'm not your life coach, Derek, or a psychic. You have to be a man and make your own damn decisions."

He grabbed her arm, roughly and not with his usual gentleness, anchoring her at his side. "Hey. I am a man. And, I do make my own decisions. But, _unfortunately, _you happen to be a part of them. So, excuse me for wanting to know what you think."

"Well, I wanna know where your head is."

Derek snorted. "Heh, well, that makes two of us, sweetheart."

Casey huffed and yanked her arm from him, her cheeks hot and flushed like only he could make them. She couldn't believe she was having this argument with him (which had turned more than a few heads), like they were one of those obnoxious couples who aired their dirty laundry in public. And, yeah, that was more than a little frustrating for, because at this point she wasn't getting any of the 'perks' from him that a girlfriend would get, just all the crazy drama times three.

"Look, I have to get work," she whispered harshly, "Before I get fired, and you see way more of me than you want to."

His jaw flexed. "Well, when are you getting home tonight?"

"I don't know; it'll probably be late though."

"Right."

He grunted and he seemed agitated, but not angry with her anymore, which she supposed was an improvement.

"Well, can we…can we do lunch or something, then?"

"That depends," Casey said, folding her arms,, "Are you gonna actually be nice to me or play Mr. Jerky Pants?"

He ignored that. It was pretty stupid anyway.

"Lunch. Saturday. Then we can…" His eyes shifted uncomfortably, "Talk, or whatever."

_Talk? _she thought blankly. Her mind flashed back to that night at the restaurant. When she'd dressed up for him, and pleaded with him to go inside with her.

_"I don't like this."_

_"Don't like what?"_

_"This talky, emotional, you know…stuff. I don't want to talk about feelings. How you feel, or I feel, or me being more sensitive, or anything girly like that."_

She felt her stomach flip. Is that what he wanted to do with her now? Talk about feelings? Because she was feeling a lot of things, and she didn-

"Casey?"

She blinked, realized she'd been rambling to herself in her head instead of responding to him like a normal person.

"Does that…" He swallowed, his mouth twitching, "Sound good to you?"

"Yes," she said instantly.

And, mind bogglingly, it really did.

And also a little terrifying.

***

After an awkward goodbye in the hallway, Casey moved dazedly through her rounds. Luckily, she didn't severely injure anyone or mess up a chart, but she did bump into more than a few trays and shelves. That Klutzilla thing worked like clockwork. Especially with anything even remotely involving Derek.

_Oh, god, Derek._

Her body was tense. It was like she was walking straight into a train wreck, that oddly (and despite all her common sense), she really, really wanted to be a part of. She was losing her mind. Plain and simple, she was going insane.

She couldn't do this. They couldn't do this.

She didn't even know what 'this' was. Maybe she was misreading things (it certainly wouldn't be the first time when it came to men).

"Ooomph" she cried as she collided with a nurse. The brunette glared at her and Casey smiled sheepishly, "Sorry."

Casey ignored the nurses mumbling and sighed, turning into the break room. She was surprised to find that Josh was not only studying, but was surrounded by Teddy and Katie at a table.

"You gotta consider your long term game, dude," Teddy was explaining, "It's a good start with sports; chicks love that. But, you gotta put yourself in a position for a scholarship so you can choose from the full range of college babes; some are better than others."

"You're kidding me, right?" she whispered to Kellie.

Kellie scrunched her nose, shaking her head as Casey took a seat at the table. "I really, really wish I was."

"…Also, book knowledge can kinda be like special teams in football. You got your main thing being a hockey captain, but for the more bookish babes, you got that ulterior weapon, too."

"That makes a lot sense," Josh said, literally taking down notes, "How do you spell ulterior?"

"I dunno," Teddy said breezily, "I forget."

"Okay, okay, I'm breaking this up," Casey said, exasperated. "Did you even get any work done?"

"Yeah," Josh and Teddy said together, as if it were obvious.

"No, worries, I helped him with the Chem," Teddy said.

Kellie nodded, rolling her eyes. "Only because I made them stop playing paper football."

Casey squinted at Teddy, appreciative and annoyed at the same time. "Aren't you supposed to be in surgery like…" she glanced at the wall clock, "Five minutes ago?"

Teddy sighed, leaning back into his seat, "Yeah, but the rents freaked out at the last second. So here I am…rehashing chem. I always hated chem. Much more of a bio man myself."

"Melanie loves Biology," Josh said, "Think you could help me with that next year?"

Teddy smirked, nodding approvingly. "Thinking long term; I like that."

"Oh, brother," Casey muttered with a sigh. "Aside from the corruption of his impressionable young mind…thanks, Ted."

"No, prob. You owe me baked good, though. Assorted baked goods."

"Yeah, yeah." Casey waved him off and turned to Josh, "Did you have a good day?"

"Yup. Took some really helpful notes. Some even on chemistry."

"Right," she said slowly, sending Teddy a warning look, "That's great, Josh."

She smiled at him. Very sweetly. Then she smacked Teddy squarely on his head.

***


	7. Chapter 7

**Wow, I don't think I've had this much trouble writing something in a LONG time. I'm sorry for the delay, but it's a crazy time of year for most of us students, I'm guessing. Plus, I honestly was working on this part a lot each week, but struggled so many times with content and dialogue and pacing….ugh.**

**Anyway, after much indecision, here's the next part. It's EXTREMELY Casey-centric. So, let me know what you guys think, I'd appreciate any constructive criticism. Hopefully, I've done it justice. **

*******

**The Empire Strikes Back, Part 6**

***

Her day was going down the toilet. Literally.

After a bizarre and highly aggravating squabble with Teddy in the break room, the hallway, and then the bathroom (don't ask), both her pager and her phone had ended up swimming in the toilet.

Which was gross.

She and Kellie had had to fish them out with a pair of surgical gloves and tongs.

Which was even grosser.

And, both of them were still ruined.

Which was just plain annoying.

_Stupid Prank Week,_ she hissed to herself.

About a month ago, a group of employees and hospital administrators had gotten together to address "growing stress management concerns." Which basically meant everyone was stressed out and adding even more stress to their lives by having stupid, stressful meetings about how stressed out they were.

Amazingly, unlike most matters of bureaucracy, a core group had become proactive about actually doing something about the problem, and each division was to determine their own "Anti-Stress" tactics.

It had started off harmless enough.

The girls, and Dan (because as sarcastic as he was, he'd never really enjoyed silly games) had suggested free massages, fondue, cookies... i.e. normal people things. Teddy, a band of interns, and apparently Monica (although Kellie had fervently maintained that the vote had been tampered with) suggested prank week.

(Later it was discovered that, yes, indeed Monica's vote had been forged. That Monica hadn't even been in that day because she'd had the flu. But, by that time it had been too late, and an already painfully stressful string of weeks was capped off with the most painfully stressful week to end all weeks: Prank Week.)

Everyone was aggravated all the time now.

Except for Teddy.

He was having a freaking blast.

"Damn Teddy," she muttered as she reached the Ladies' Restroom.

"Unh uh, don't go in there."

Casey squinted and turned around to find Kellie beside her, grimacing.

"What-why…?"

Kellie just titled her head and sent her a pointed look.

"Teddy? Again?"

"Again," Kellie grumbled. "I already called janitor Bob--although I think he might be in on it. So just use the coed one in the break room."

"Ughh. I just want to wring Ted's neck sometimes."

She acted it out for a moment and Kellie smirked, rolling her eyes.

"Don't worry. Dan and I have something planned."

"Dan? I thought he hated pranks."

"He did. Right up until an our ago when Teddy stole his iPhone, posed as him, and invited two of his ex-girlfriends to dinner tonight."

Casey grimaced. "Ouch."

"Yeah, he's pissed. So we're gonna get his car towed," she said flippantly.

_Oh, that seemed reasonable enou--wait, what?_

"What?" Casey squeaked. "Isn't that a bit over the top?"

"Over the top idiots only respond to acts of over the top idiocy. So, yes, we're gonna out idiot Ted."

Casey arched a brow. "You do realize how ridiculous you sound right now, yes?"

"Ridiculously...idiotic?" Kellie asked smugly.

Casey tilted her head and conceded. "Touché."

"Alright, wish us dumb luck."

Casey nodded, stood there watching bemusedly for a moment, and then shook her head and turned the corner. There was no way that was going to go smoothly. But, they were grownups (for the most part), so she'd let them figure that out on their own. As well as possibly with the help of the local authorities.

She, meanwhile, had enough of her own private melodrama.

Today was her and Derek's lunch date. Or shindig. Or get-together, outing, hootenanny... insert the 30 million other nouns she'd fiddled around with in her head.

'Date' was the one that made the most sense and the least sense at the same time.

_Are you even allowed to have dates with your stepsiblings_?, she thought wryly. _Isn't that, like, illegal or something?_

She sighed and shook it off. There was no use agonizing about it (she'd already done plenty of that the night before). They were going to have lunch. They were going to talk about feelings. And, that was that. It could be feelings about each other, or feelings about his job, or feelings about the Oilers' new roster for all she knew.

But, just in case of a 'dating emergency', she'd packed a spare outfit, extra deodorant, and tried to do her hair a little differently. She'd noticed he liked it when she wore it down, because--although he'd never vocalize it--his eyes would widen and light suddenly, briefly, a sure giveaway that he liked something. And, as a matter of survival, Casey had learned to read those subtle things about him, and about the many unspoken feelings beneath his aloof surface.

Ironically, her keen perception had utterly failed her on the whole attraction thing. She'd been so busy censoring her own warm, irritating emotions about him, that she hadn't really had the time or energy to realize what was going on in his head. Not to mention that, frankly, the idea of Derek ever feeling something for _her_ ("Keener", "Klutzilla" "Drama Queen") was a little baffling. So baffling that even now she wasn't entirely sure.

Honestly, she hadn't felt certain of anything lately.

Which was odd, because she always knew what to feel. Feeling was sort of her superpower. Things were right, or things were wrong. Her heart was a big, black and white and canvas, and she worked hard to keep it that way.

Especially when it came to romance.

Not that she found this in the least bit romantic. Sure, she cared about him so much it felt ridiculous sometimes. And, sure, the idea of expressing that to him with her body was more than a little appealing. But, there was so much messy clutter around the situation, it took all the real 'fun' out of it.

They weren't hormonal teenagers (although sometimes they liked to pretend). They were adults.

And, they weren't strangers who could just sort take a shot at something. They were step siblings and friends.

This was black and white. They were either in it, completely, crazy 'let's-make-a-run-for-it-in-Arkansas' style, or they weren't. They couldn't screw it up.

This was black and white, just like she liked it. But, she didn't feel black or white. She felt all sorts of gray.

She sighed and adjusted the skirt on her hips again.

_Was this too much?_

If it was just a shindig or a hootenanny it was a definitely too much.

But then again this was a man, not to mention Derek, so he probably wouldn't think twice about her apparel.

Unless it actually was a date. In which case they were both screwed anyway, so it didn't really matter what the hell she was wearing.

She was considering wiping the lipstick off at least, when someone knocked at the door. She frowned before opening it. It was Kellie.

"Um, ocupado?" Casey quipped.

"Yeah, I know, but I got a note for you from Jennie at the desk. And, oh yeah, and she wanted me to remember to say, and I quote,"  
Kellie cleared her throat dramatically, "'I'm not your damn secretary'."

"Hmm," Casey pursed her lips. "Well, I'm sure it sounded nicer in her head."

"I'm sure," Kellie said, handing her the note.

"Thanks, Kel."

The door closed behind her and Casey unfolded the slip of paper.

_D's passed out. Phone in Froggy. Dropped him off at home. You cooking later? -Ralph._

Casey squinted. "What the…"

***

"…_hell_ is going on here?" she shrieked the moment she entered the front door.

Ralph started, his feet literally clearing the ground from where he was leaning over the couch. "Oh, it's just you." He sighed. "I thought it was a chick robber."

"Ugh, Ralphy," she groaned. "Would you explain this gibberish you left me?"

She marched towards him, waving the flimsy paper in the air with exasperation.

"Well, I thought it was pretty obvious," he said a-matter-of-factly, "Derek got beyond wasted last night--not my fault. Then I got some call from J-Bone, you know at the bar. Said he was passed out on a bench across the street…"

Casey's brow line was climbing farther and farther up her forehead as he continued.

"And, apparently, somehow, he ended up dropping his phone in that giant Frog Fountain downtown." Ralph shook his head. "I dunno. But, my job's done here; he's all yours."

He stepped to the right and Casey's brows spiked even farther as she caught Derek's sprawled out form on the couch. His clothes and hair were disheveled, one of his cheeks was bruised, and he was snoring gracelessly into a cushion.

"Oh, my god. Oh, my god."

She leaned over him and then stepped back. Then she leaned over him again and then stepped back.

"Uh, you okay there, Case?" asked Ralph.

"Yes, I just, _ugh-_I'm really annoyed and concerned at the same time." She sighed and turned towards Ralph. "Did J-Bone" (god, she hated saying his name) "Say why he was there?"

"Nope." Ralph shrugged. "Just that he'd been pretty obnoxious."

Well, that explained why she'd hadn't seen him that morning. She'd just figured he was sleeping in, like he did every Saturday. She sighed again, this time more softly, and her eyes gentled as she knelt beside his ragged form on the couch. She smoothed his hair back with her palm. "Do you mind helping me get him upstairs?" she asked over her shoulder.

"No, problem, senorita."

Ralph crouched down beside her and slipped Derek's arm around his shoulder.

"And, uh, thanks for picking him up, Ralph. It's a long story I'd rather not get into, but my phone fell down the toilet."

"It's no problem," Ralph said with a grunt as he hoisted Derek up, "He's bailed me out plenty of times. Remember when I ended up naked in that-"

"Yup, no need to recap, Ralph."

"Gotcha."

Casey grunted and looped her own arm around Derek, helping Ralph carry him up the steps. "Oh, god," Casey moaned, "Why is he so heavy?"

"I know. He used to be a lot scrawnier."

"And, more importantly, _lighter_."

Ten hours later (at least in her head), they finally reached the top of the steps. Casey let out a sigh of relief as she nudged his bedroom door open with her foot. They trudged towards his mattress.

"You know," Ralph said, "It's been a while since I've been up here. Saw a lot more of it in high school, but now it seems weird for a grown man to be another man's bedroom, you know?"

"Yeah, it's all very fascinating. Now, can we let him down?"

"Sure."

Ralph instantly let go, sending Derek, and a stunned Casey tumbling down unto his mattress. "Ralph," she hissed, freeing her limbs from under Derek, "A warning would have been nice."

"I did warn you," he answered blankly, "I said 'sure.'"

"Oh, right. How silly of me." She wiped the messy hair from her face, and sat up on the edge of the bed, "Thanks, I got it from here."

"Cool. 'cause I told my pops I was taking a ten minute break about an hour ago."

She frowned, apologetic. "I'm sorry it took you so long."

He waved it off. "Nah, it's cool. I stopped to grab some pizza first."

"Right…"

"See ya."

"Bye, Ralphy."

The door swung shut and Casey turned back to Derek on the mattress. He was still out cold and he looked, well, really shitty. She stroked back his bangs and frowned, trying to remember the last time she'd seen Derek drunk, let alone plastered. It couldn't have been since college, so why in the world would he give it another go now? Especially the day of their…whatever.

This man never made any sense to her.

She turned his head gently, so she could see the bruising on his cheek. It was nothing too serious, nothing worst than he'd gotten on the ice, but it was still disconcerting. Had he been in a fight or something?

And, he'd lost his phone in the frog fountain? That was at least, what, a mile or so from the bar?

Her heart was running between confused and upset and worried, one after the other.

She undid the top buttons of his shirt and checked for any other weird bruising or markings. She grimaced. She could smell the alcohol all over him (probably even the neighbors could he reeked so much of it). But, she didn't smell any perfume (thank god), or find any lipstick traces, or anything else distinctly feminine, so she relaxed. Kind of.

He looked uncomfortable, even in his sleep, so she undid the rest of his shirt, and then, with much difficulty, slipped it off him. Then she unlaced his shoes, which was also really difficult. For some reason he always knotted them like he was tying up a hostile hostage, or something. Finally, she undid the first one and slipped it off with a thud. Then his sock. She did this with his left foot as well, and then sat there on the end of the bed for a moment, watching him.

She pushed up on her hands and knees, and for whatever reason (this day had been beyond crazy), she found herself crawling up the mattress until she'd reached the top, and then laying beside him.

"Idiot," she mumbled.

She heard a knocking at the front door and sat up instantly, frowning. "_Ralph, it's open! Obviously!"_

But, the knocking continued, followed strangely by the doorbell, which finally got her out of bed.

_Oh, god_, she thought, _I hope he didn't do anything stupid to the Davis' yard again._

She ran down the steps, threw on her most apologetic smile, and opened the door. "I'm so, so sorr--Sam?"

"That's my name; don't wear it out."

Casey was speechless (which was saying a lot for her). Sam? Sam Richards? At their doorway? She hadn't seen him in two years, if even. He lived in another province, and while Derek and he tried to meet up whenever possible on the road, it was rare (obviously) that he made his way back to London. And, now he was just standing there with that same quirky, crooked grin of his like they had a standing appointment or something.

She blinked. "Okay, so I'm dreaming, right?"

"Only if you have really lame dreams about me ringing the doorbell."

"Sam?" she said again.

"Yeah, still me."

She squinted and only spoke again because she realized the silence was getting awkward. "Sam?"

He laughed. "Casey, still goofy as usual. Good to know you haven't changed." He tilted his head suggestively. "Can I come in?"

"Uh, uh, sure," she said blankly, stepping aside, "Make yourself at home…?"

"Thanks."

She closed the door behind them, and turned with him. "Okay, so don't take this the wrong way or anything, because it's great to see you, but…what the hell are you doing here?

"Well, you know." He shrugged. "I was just in the neighborhood."

"The neighborhood?" Casey said incredulously, "The neighborhood about what, four or five hours away from where you live?

He snapped his fingers, liked he'd actually been trying to pull one over on her, which she really hoped he wasn't (that'd be beyond sad). "Okay, you got me. So, yeah, I planned this."

"Shocking," Casey deadpanned.

He smiled, but it faltered slightly as they settled in the living room. "I got some um, unsettling phone calls from Derek last night."

"Alright," she said slowly, expectantly.

But, he just stood there, watching her like he was expecting something, too. Finally, after a somewhat annoying and uncomfortable staring contest, he continued. "You know, about Rebecca."

"Rebecca?"

"Crap," Sam froze like he'd just triggered an alarm. "So you _didn't_ know about that then, huh?"

"No. Not quite."

"Yeah, that explains why you weren't seething when I saw you."

Sam wasn't a huge fan of Rebecca. Never had been.

But, Casey?

Yeah, she hated that bitch.

Mostly because she was cold (to everyone but Derek, and sometimes even him), self-centered, tactless, and always looked great doing it, too. But there was also that other, nerve-stabbing fact that she'd stolen away an intimate part of Derek from Casey for three years.

Derek had dated a countless number of girls, and was even serious with a few of them. But, there had always been this connection between him and Casey. Not anything romantic, or lustful. Just a connection. A steady, unblockable, sometimes nearly obsessive fixation with annoying each other, outdoing each other, amusing each other, or just each other.

She hadn't really noticed it (which was ridiculous in retrospect), until it was gone, and his attention was always on Rebecca. To be fair she had been dating Clark at the time (or 'Super Lame Man', as Derek had called him). But it had still really, really aggravated her--even if she'd never been willing to admit it.

And, now, of course, Rebecca struck again.

Just when she'd finally admitted to herself that maybe being his everything in that totally gushy, his eyes are actually mushy way that had always annoyed her when he was dating Rebecca wouldn't be _too_ horrible.

It was almost funny, almost hysterical. Almost.

Sam swallowed awkwardly, apparently reading the tension on her face. "Yeah, so, I uh, got a of bunch drunken messages about Rebecca and a giant frog, and, well, you actually," he said, frowning. "It was a bit incomprehensible. But, it seemed like he was in a pretty bad place." He shrugged. "And I had the weekend off anyway, and…"

"You're a good friend," she finished for him. She sighed and glanced uncomfortably up the steps, "Well, I'd call him down for you, but he's sort of beyond plastered."

"Yeah." He snorted. "I'll bet. He was already wasted when he called me the first time. And, then he got progressively drunker and obnoxious as the night went on."

"Yeah, so I've heard. Well, that's the 'lovely' effect Bec has on him, huh?"

"Eh, I guess. Thought he was over her though."

"Me, too," Casey muttered.

She swallowed, but it was really hard what with that damn lump in her throat. She felt a little nauseous.

She tried to smile it off. "This is actually probably great timing. I need to be back at the hospital like five minutes ago…We'll catch up later?"

Sam nodded at her. "Definitely."

_***_

_On the bright side, _Casey thought dryly as she entered the hospital, _This day couldn't get any damn worse._

"Oh, god, this is the worst day of my life."

"Teddy?" Casey cried, pushing through the double doors and following his despairing voice.

He was pressed against the hospital wall in handcuffs, clusters of waiting patients and hospital staff looking on. He grunted and looked helplessly at her as she jogged up to him.

"This is all a huge misunderstanding, officer."

The officer rolled his eyes and pulled Teddy towards the exit. "Yeah, yeah, tell me all about it on the way to the station."

"But, officer, I can explain-"

Casey gaped as they moved passed her, Teddy crying out, "Casey, call my mother. Tell her I love her. And, and, my hamster, make sure she's okay."

"Oh, my god, someone needs to-"

'Pfft, ha!"

Casey's eyes widened as Dan and Kellie appeared behind her, laughing hysterically.

"Don't worry, it's just a stripper with handcuffs," Kellie gasped.

Casey turned her head frantically between the laughing couple and Teddy's emotional form through window. Then she exhaled, relaxing. "Huh, well, I guess that explains why his pants were so snug."

"Woooh, yeah," Dan let out one last laugh, before sighing, "The whole towing thing didn't quite work out."

"Apparently you need a reason to tow someone's car, and, eh," Kellie shrugged, "We were too lazy to come up with one so we just got a stripper instead."

"My cousin, Brandon," Dan said, "He's working his way through grad school."

"And--fun fact--he volunteers at the local soup kitchen."

"Hmm, well that's colorful," Casey said dryly. "I would say I'm sorry I missed all of this, but I'm really, really not."

"Well, someone's a sour patch kid," Dan said, slipping his arm around her, "What's the matter? Prank Week got you down?"

She instantly stepped away from him and he shrugged it off, because, honestly...? This was like a daily ritual for them.

She sighed. "More like Rebecca's got me down."

"Oooh." Kellie grimaced. "The Wicked Witch of the North strikes again, huh?"

"A very dramatic sequel," she deadpanned.

Dan squinted. "Who's Rebecca? And, how do I _not_ meet her?"

"Derek's ex," Casey muttered, shrugging off her coat, "But, you wouldn't know that since you always disappear the second we even hint at an emotional conver-"

"Um, Casey," Kellie said, tapping her shoulder.

"He's gone, isn't he?"

"Yup."

She sighed. "Well, at least he's consistent."

Kellie nodded. "I like to think so. And, really, with the world as topsy-turvy as it is these days, isn't that what we all need? Some consistency?"

Casey eyed her knowingly. "You're _really_ jazzed he helped you bust Teddy, aren't you?"

"Oh, so jazzed."

Casey's lips quirked for her, but it was halfhearted, and Kellie (after she finished her dramatic fist pump), caught Casey's frown. "You don't look too jazzed, though," she said quietly, "Is Derek pretty torn up about it?"

"No, more like liquored up about it," she said lowly, "And, apparently, he and Rebecca had some sort of 'reunion' last night."

"Ewww." Kellie twisted her nose. "That sounds not-awesome."

"Ya think?" Casey said sarcastically.

Casey huffed and pulled her hair up into a sloppy pony tail, doing a very bad impression of not being pissed off. Kellie mumbled. "I'm sorry. It seemed like you guys were finally getting a clue, too."

"Yeah, I kno--wait, what?"

Kellie rolled her eyes. "Casey, give me some credit here. First, you get all bitchy over Katie--arguably the nicest, sweetest person that ever existed, save for maybe Jesus. Second, Dan keeps griping about your overprotective brother wanting to rip his head off. And, third, today you leave for 'lunch' dressed like J-Lo…" Casey rolled her eyes. "Obviously something's going on."

"There's nothing going on. Not between us anyway," she muttered.

"Oh, please, Derek's been sweating you harder than a fat man trapped in the desert."

"As poetic as that was," said Casey dryly, "_I'm _not interested. And, I hope he and Rebecca live happily ever after in her bitchy ice palace in the sky."

"Yeah, seems like you're taking it real well, Case."

Casey shot one last glower at her before storming off to the break room.

***

"Yo, MickeyDee's!"

"Don't talk to me, Teddy, I'm not in the mood."

Casey sighed, scrubbing her forehead when he still, despite her request, ran up to her.

"Teddy," she sighed.

"I know, I know, you're having a chick moment," he said dismissively, "But you need to sign for a delivery."

"A delivery, Ted?" She asked tiredly, "If you're gonna keep ruining my week, could you at least be more creative?"

He rolled his eyes. "No, for real, Case, I'm serious. For some incomprehensible reason, someone bought you lilies. You would have gotten the page a few minutes ago if your pager still worked. "

"Don't try to lure me with me pretty things."

"Pfft. Trust me, after being arrested by a, well," He shrugged, " mildly attractive male stripper, I'm a bit tapped out on pranks for the day, 'kay?"

Hmm. Maybe, Operation Out-Idiot had actually worked.

But, most importantly she had flowers. From Derek. She wasn't sure she wanted flowers from Derek. She wasn't even sure whether or not she wanted to kick his ass the next time she saw him. But lilies were her favorite, and he'd obviously had to have been randomly paying attention to her whenever she'd mentioned it.

She'd at least sign for them, she decided.

But, she wouldn't like them. And, she wouldn't thank him.

"Oh, yeah," Teddy said, "Jennie says, and I quote…"

"Yeah, yeah, I know, she's not my secretary."

"Actually, no. She was wondering if you'd be able to make her potluck next week."

She blinked. "Oh, yeah. That sounds nice."

***

The second stupid message she got from a man that day: _My bad. -Mo Mo._

"My bad?" she whispered in disbelief, "You can't be serious."

What the hell did 'My bad' even mean? Had he been with Rebecca? Talked with Rebecca, spelunked with Rebecca…what? Or maybe he didn't even know that Casey knew about Rebecca, and these were for getting wasted? But, then since when did men send women flowers for being drunk? Unless they'd done something wrong while being drunk, she decided, glowering.

"Ugh," she finally grumbled, "He never makes any damn sense."

She huffed and threw them into the trash bin. Then she took them out. Then she shoved them in there again and stomped them down. Then she-

"MacDonald?" she heard a quizzical voice call behind her.

She grimaced and turned around slowly.

"Uh, um, hi, Dr. Drew," she squeaked, "How's it goin' there?"

She left an awkward fist bump on his shoulder and he stood there, watching her hand move away blankly.

"Don't do that again."

"Yeah, let's, let's not," she said, scrunching her nose. She cleared her throat. "Right, so I'll just-"

He cut her off by setting a file in her hands. "I'm trusting you," was all he said.

She sputtered, "On my own?"

"Start to finish. Don't let it go to your head, MacDonald. Just get it done, be precise, and don't get-"

"Emotionally involved; I know."

She made a zipper motion over her heart.

He glanced at her over the rim of his glasses, then at the demolished flowers, and then smiled. It was a tiny, almost microscopic. But, Casey had 20/20 vision and she knew she'd seen it.

"Right. Well, don't make me regret it." He moved away, but then turned back after a few steps, "Oh, and, uh, have fun with Prank Week, but please, don't get the cops involved."

"Oh, oh, oh, no, that was just a stripper."

His eyes popped, and she suddenly realized he'd just been kidding, and apparently had no idea about the prank from earlier.

"Oh, oh, oh, no, look, that's not-"

"Any of my business," Dr. Drew interjected. "I'll check in with you later."

He walked off again, more hurriedly this time, and Casey groaned. She'd always hoped this stuff would stop happening to her after high school.

***

Apparently, one day she'd look back at this and laugh. At least that's what everyone was always saying about sucky things anyway. In her opinion, the jury was still out.

She pushed through the double doors for at least the fifth time that day, stepped out unto the concrete, and breathed.

"Thank god this is ov-"

"Casey."

She spun around, because she was 70 percent sure she was hearing things. But no, there was Derek. He was standing awkwardly on the sidewalk, his hands smashed into his pockets, his hair still disheveled as hell.

He walked towards her and her breath caught for a moment, she wasn't sure why. He stopped a few feet in front of her like he was waiting for her to make a move.

She'd thought all day about what she might say to him when she saw him next.

"You look like shit," she settled on.

He laughed, but it wasn't really relaxed or all that pleasant. "Heh, well it's been a pretty shitty day."

So shitty he still hadn't changed his clothes yet. Not really. He'd slipped another shirt on, and was wearing sandals instead of shoes. Which was odd. But, then again, what about this day hadn't been?

She just stared at him.

"Did you get my flowers?" he asked uncomfortably, "They're your favorite, right?"

"Yeah, I did," she said shortly, "They're in the trash bin."

He blinked. "Oh."

"Don't 'oh' me."

She huffed and finally closed the space between them with a few stomps of her flats. His back straightened instantly. "What, did you read in a magazine that you could be all jerky and then just send a girl her favorite flowers to make up for it?"

"Well, yeah," he said, faltering, "Sam did."

Casey rolled her eyes and deadpanned, "Well, it's good to hear he's reading more."

"Casey-"

"Where the hell were you today?"

He sighed and scrubbed the back of his ducking head. "Something came up."

"What? You mean Rebecca?"

His eyes widened darted back up. Off her knowing glare, he grimaced. "Sam?" he guessed.

"No, a little birdy told me," she spat sarcastically.

"It's not what it looks like, Casey."

_It's not what it looks like? _Ugh, she couldn't believe she was having this conversation with a man again, let alone _Derek, _of all people. She felt like she was Stupid Girl Number 3 in some bad teen movie.

And, it was cliché and embarrassing, and frustrating as hell that she had to ask it, but she did anyway: "Did you sleep with her?"

"What?" It was Derek's turn to look angry. "Of course not."

"Right, because it's ridiculous for me to ask that when you stay out all night and come back drunk and with your clothes all rumpled."

She pivoted and took off before she'd even gotten it all out, because damnit, his eyes were weapons. And, she really didn't want to have to defend herself against them right now. But, he grabbed her, almost yanking, like he always did in these situations.

"Would you just stop it?" he hissed at her. "I didn't sleep with her, okay? I can't believe you'd even--just no, okay? _No_."

"How am I supposed to believe that?"

"Because, I just _told you_."

He grasped her by the shoulders, softly this time, and she didn't fight him. "I just passed out at J-B's and I…I don't even know how I got back home…Ralph, maybe? I don't know, but I wouldn't do that. You have to know that, Casey."

His eyes gentled, and she cleared her throat, trying to swallow over that stupid lump. Her head ducked under the curtain of her hair, and she let him pull her head into his chest, because…because she was _weak_ for him, she decided. It was the only explanation.

"No," she finally cried, pushing off from him, "I want an explanation from you."

He sighed. "It's complicated."

"Right; and by complicated you mean stacked and blonde?"

"Are we really gonna go right back there again?"

"We never left there, Derek. Sam told me you left all these drunken messages about her on his phone."

His mouth twitched and he kept flexing his hands in frustration at his side. "And, if I was screwing her do you really think I'd have time to do that?"

She crossed her arms against her chest. "I don't know, it depends on how 'quickly' you work."

"Oh, that's real mature, Casey."

"Right, and I should totally take tips on maturity from a guy who fought a frog statute last night and lost."

He grimaced. "I fought a frog? Ugh, never mind. Forget it. You want me to be honest? Fine. Rebecca called me last night and I freaked out, okay? I just freaked out and I got stupid and drunk and I'm sorry."

She shook her head, pursed her lips, and asked Stupid Girl question 2: "Do you still have feelings for her?"

Derek huffed and threw his hands up. "What is this? The Dating Inquisition?"

"Yes," she said sharply, "It is. And, I want some answers."

"Fine. Then ask me questions about _us_, Casey, not about her. It's not her that I've been agonizing about, it's you."

"Me?" Casey laughed out right. "How has any of this been about me? Better yet, how the hell is you blowing me off and moping around over another woman about me?"

"Casey," he said, his voice heavy with emotion and fatigue, "When she left me…"

"When she cheated on you, Derek. When she screwed your teammate."

"Yeah, I remember, thanks," he said tightly, "I was sort of there, you know, slowly dying inside.…But, she was right…"

"_Excuse me?"_

"She always said that I didn't love her enough. That I cared about hockey more than I cared about her."

"That's ridiculous."

"Was it?" He asked, "I was always traveling, always working out, always watching tapes. I did put it first."

She couldn't believe him right now. She just wanted slap him across his face. How could he possibly blame himself for upsetting the bitchiest bitch on the planet?

"So what?" she asked with exasperation, "That makes her sleeping around okay? You deserved better. You still deserve better."

"Yeah, duh. But, so did she, Casey."

Her mouth parted instantly, ready with the next rebuttal, when he looked at her, his gaze pointed, intense.

_Oh,_ she thought blankly, _maybe this had more to do with her than she'd thought._

She walked slowly back towards him, shaking her head. "We are not you and Rebecca. And, better yet, I'm not you."

"I'm not saying that," He said on a sigh, "You're not listening to me."

"Then explain it to me."

"I don't want either of us in this position if it won't go anywhere but Sucksville. And, ironically, us being stepsiblings, is I think the least our problems. You are in an _exclusive_ relationship with your job-"

She huffed. "So what? Since I'm in residency, that means I can't be emotionally available for you?"

"Casey," he said, leaning in, "You can't even be _physically_ available most of time. I mean, even when I got my interview-"

"Oh, my god," Casey gasped, "You're _still_ holding that against me?"

"I'm not holding anything against you. I'm just being realistic. You're not gonna change. Heh," He let a mirthless laugh, "I didn't even change. I blew out my knee."

"Well, you're right, Derek. I'm not a hockey player. I'm a doctor. And, I'm not gonna pull a muscle one day and not be able to diagnose people. This is it. This is my passion. And, a lot of the time it sucks, and it's hard, and I miss out on so much. But at the end of the day, I do love what I do…and I do think it will be worth it…"

"I know you do. That's one of things I admire about you, Casey. You always follow through. I…I don't. And, I've just been struggling with whether I wanted to follow through on this because, because honestly, sometimes what you're offering me doesn't feel like enough."

"Oh, and what?" Her face heated with indignation. "You think you're 'enough'? You're my stepbrother. You're broker than I am, because you have bad credit. You're a recovering womanizer--and by recovering, I mean trying to be better at it. And, your only committed relationship…? Apparently, you weren't even that committed."

"Are you done here?" he hissed, his entire body stiff.

"No, actually, I'm just getting started." She started ticking off on her fingers. "You're self-centered. You're lazy. You're not always that bright…."

"Okay, okay, could you pull the claws back in already? I wanna do this with you."

He set his hands firmly on her shoulders, trying to calm her down, or reach out to her, she wasn't sure. But, she still pulled away.

"Really? I thought I wasn't 'offering enough'."

"Rationally, you really aren't," he said bluntly, "But, I'm not rational, I'm stupid, remember? And, I want you stupid bad."

A blush slapped her cheeks and she turned instantly from him in frustration. He was always managing to pull at both sides of her: that uptight, hypercritical cerebral side of her that was persistently telling her this was stupidest thing they could ever do with each other. And, that other, softer side of her that he just kept wearing on.

"Casey, please....say something."

She shook her head, even though her back was facing him.

"Casey." His voice lowered and wavered with uncertainty. "Am I reading this wrong, because you're not making any damn sense to me."

"I don't make any sense?" she cried, finally spinning back around, "I don't make any sense? You are incomprehensible."

"Well, at least I put how I feel out there for you. You're just leaving me hanging here."

"Good. Hang for a while. Because you've been leaving me hanging all day. Not coming home last night. Not showing up at the restaurant so you could shower yourself in drinks, and leaving me to play guessing games about why you backed out. Then I had to hear from Sam that you've been drunk dialing him about your ex-girlfriend, and--oh, yeah, here's a good one--possibly screwing her. And then-then you send me these stupid lilies with a message that says 'MY BAD' on them?! Like that's supposed to make any sense or even begin to explain what the hell you've been up to all day!"

She huffed, almost panting, and she realized she'd moved closer to him with each angry sentence, so that their toes were almost touching. Derek didn't step back, didn't even flinch. He just smirked.

"Well, now you know how I've been feeling, princess."

"What?"

"I've obviously been after you for weeks now. But you just keep shutting me down and sending me mixed signal after mixed signal after mixed signal. Even now, you're sending me mixed signals."

She smacked him in the chest. "Oh, and were you 'after me' when you went out with Katie?"

"You ditched me at the restaurant."

"Again, I did not ditch you."

"You acted completely bitchy and then when I tried to tell you how I felt that night, you wouldn't even let me explain or touch you or anything."

"Oh, you mean that 'moonlit' night when you came back from making out with another woman?" Casey asked sarcastically, "Yeah, sorry if I wasn't in the mood to play bed buddies with you."

"Just tell me you want me."

"No," she hissed.

"Say it."

"Never."

His glare was steady, bullish. But she could see the growing vulnerability there, too.

_Ugh, his stupid eyes._

She conceded. Casey style: "Not until you say something else nice to me."

Derek's eyes flickered with confusion, and a bit of relief. Then he folded his arms. "What, you want me to say something romantic? Whisper sweet nothings about how you've been tearing me apart for months now?"

"Yes."

"Well, I'm not going to. I got you the stupid flowers, even though my brain was still exploding in my skull. And, I waited outside for you here, because only god knows when you'll ever get off from a shift. And I told you that I wanted you--_you_: this crazy, bitchy, klutzy, emotional booby trap of woman even as you fought me tooth and nail every step of the way. So, no, I'm not being 'romantic'. I don't do romantic. This," he said, sweeping his hand over his chest, "Is all you get. Take it or leave it, sweetheart."

She glared at him and then her lips were on his, her hands grasping his cheeks in a quick, hard, almost angry peck before either of them could even blink.

She pulled back with a gasp and his hand stayed on her back, keeping her close.

"You…" His face pinched like he was about to curse her, "Make me ache for you."

"Good, you deserve it."

She shoved on his chest and her cheeks exploded again with emotion.

"And, I don't care if you don't do romance. I do romance. And, I want more flowers, and dinner, and chocolate and 'sweet nothings' and everything else you do for all the other girls you mack on. Got it?"

"I got it."

"Good."

She walked shakily the rest of the distance to the driver's side, Derek wiping dazedly at her lipstick on his mouth.

_Shit._

She'd just kissed Derek.

Derek Venturi.

Her stepbrother.

He opened the car door for her. "You do realize we're screwed now, right?" he asked.

"Oh, yeah."

***

Don't worry. More substantial Dasey to come soon ;)


	8. Chapter 8

**Okay, so it's been MORE than a while again. Sorry ****L**** Life has gotten much busier with summer job stuff, etc. Thank you for all your faithful reviews. You guys rock. HARD. Seriously, I'm incredibly stoked from all the encouragement. Hopefully this part will not be a disappointment…**

**Also, if some scenes seem for familiar, it's on purpose ****J**

******IMPORTANT NOTE: Due to extreme absentmindedness and bad luck with technology, I accidentally posted an earlier draft of this chapter in place of the previous chapter. I fixed it. But, unfortunately not before confusing some readers. SO SORRY. I definitely didn't mean to falsely present a multiple update.****  
**

*******

**Deja New, Part 7**

***

If they were both screwed, (which, yeah, Casey knew they definitely were), it was the slow kind. The slow, you can actually see each painful, absurd, strangely thrilling twist of the bolt going in kind of screwed.

This was just… "_Damn crazy," _she hissed, flying through the door, "_God, _what is wrong with me?"

Her eyes shifted sharply, suddenly to Sam's frozen form in the living room.

"Uhm…" He smiled awkwardly, "Milk Dud?"

He lifted the yellow box in front of him like a tiny shield and Casey huffed.

"You and your best friend," she said, walking towards him pointedly, "Are morons."

"Uh…"

She plucked a small round treat from the box and chewed on it. The gunk stuck to her teeth and was an oddly satisfying distraction. "I just kissed Derek."

"Uh…"

"On the mouth."

"Um…"

"And, I liked it."

"Casey, I don't know if-"

"And, I think he liked it, too."

"I'm really not the per-"

"And, I sort of think that when I left…" She sucked on air, her face pinched as she plopped down on the couch. Sam stood frozen for a moment, before stiffly turning to face her, "Well, I think it was sort of implied that we'd be doing it again. Together. Habitually. Like on the regular."

Sam blinked, like his brain was catching up to her finally. "Um yeah, Case, I know what 'habitually' means."

"Were the flowers your idea?!"

She launched to her feet again, making Sam jerk back with a squeak. She hadn't meant to do that. But, her emotions and her body were having a free-for-all tonight. Exhibit A: She kissed Derek!

Sam seemed to read the crazy on her face and took a step back. " 'Idea' is such a strong word.'"

"Your stupid flowers and your stupid magazine reading," she said, stabbing him in the chest with her pointer finger. "And your stupid helping him out. You…you…are an accomplice."

"I think you need some sleep," Sam said slowly. "Or, maybe some tea."

"Dude, what's taking so long?" she heard Ralph whine as he came up from the basement. "Babe Raider awaits and I'm craving the Dud love?"

_Okay, so that sounded wrong, _Casey thought blankly.

Sam had a similarly discomforted look as he turned with her towards Ralph. Casey's mouth parted in confusion. Why was Ralph there anyway? Were they having some sort of 'Guys' Night Out' where they played video games and truth-or-dared each other into hitting on their stepsiblings?

_I kissed Derek._

And, even weirder…

"Babe Raider?" she asked, squinting.

"Yeah," Ralph answered quietly. He was eyeing her strangely. But, then again she supposed that was how others looked at people when they were quasi-almost-sort-of-thinking about dating their stepbrother. "Uh, a new anniversary addition just came out." He raised his hands dramatically. "Babe Raider: Evolution."

"I wish you guys would evolve," she muttered.

It was half-hearted and neither male seemed too phased by the jab.

Then Ralph offered awkwardly, "Milk Dud?"

"Eh, no." She scrunched her nose. "But, um, if Derek comes back--I mean, of _course_, he's coming back; he lives here. _We_," she said gesturing awkwardly, "Live here. Together. Because we're stepsiblings. Anywhoooo…." she tugged on the last syllable like it was a life line, her feet moving slowly, but determinedly towards the steps, "When he gets back, just…" She cleared her throat. "I'll be upstairs. In my room. Not waiting, just there. Okay, alright, goodbye, goodnight."

She grimaced, shed one more awkward glance at their baffled faces, and then sprinted up the steps.

***

She brushed her teeth for five minutes straight.

_Where was he?_

Not that she knew what the hell she was going to do about him and /or to him when he got there.

She kissed Derek.

She wracked her brain and tried to remember what it meant when you kissed somebody these days. What it meant when _Derek_ kissed someone (not that he'd really had a chance to respond. It had lasted all of .2 seconds before her brain had caught up and she'd freaked out). Usually, it meant pretty much zero. He kissed girls like he ate cereal: daily, sloppily, and exploring a variety of brands.

But, then again, there had been that whole, warped Life Time Movie Moment in the parking lot before that. And, the flowers. And, the eyes. Those warm, urgent eyes. And, all those damn words that she'd never heard him say before.

_It's not her that I've been agonizing about, it's you._

_I wanna do this with you._

_I want you stupid bad_

It still made her blush. As well as want to pull her hair out with her bare hands. _Where the hell is he?_

It wasn't odd that she wanted Derek around. It wasn't new. They were close. And as much as she tried to never vocalize this aloud, she missed him a lot when she didn't see him over the week. But, now that normal, dull, lonely sensation was replaced with this sharp, prickly, she could still sort of smell him and taste his mouth on her lips feeling that was just…not dull. And not normal. Not at all.

She sighed, rubbed at her forehead and stepped out of the bathroom and into the hallway. Still no Derek. No, just the sounds of shrieking man-boys playing Babe Raider: Evolution downstairs.

She sent a lingering glance down the steps and to the front door, before moving towards her own door, and pushing it open.

She just needed to go to sleep.

After changing her pajama set. Again.

***

When her bedroom door creaked open she was waiting for him. Because she was way too tired to be coy, or subtle. And, it just…felt silly at this point to play games.

Her knees were drawn up, her back pressed to her head board, her bedroom flooded with darkness save for the creeping light of the hallway.

"Hey," Derek whispered.

His hair was messier than before (if that were even possible), like he'd been tugging and scrubbing through it. He always did that when he was stressed, or exasperated, or nervous. Casey was all of the above.

"Hey," she finally said back.

He closed the door behind him and it was dark again. Something felt easier about that. Easier, but scarier, too. Like being in a lake. The water always relaxed her, soothed her. But, then she'd look down into that dark, muddled water, at the hidden bottom, and feel unsettled, too.

Derek flipped on her light switch.

She was relieved and not relieved at same time.

Then his face scrunched and he flipped it again. Her stomach felt that good kind of bad and she slipped under her blanket, almost as if she was hiding, but she wasn't.

Derek sighed and it was like he was talking to her through his grunts, and pacing, and the rustling of his clothes: Stressed. Exasperated. Nervous.

He sighed again. Like a decision. "Hey."

"You said that already."

He shifted towards her bed, and her eyes shifted with him, searching for and finding the sharp lines of his figure and his face.

She watched silently as he slipped his shirt from his chest, over his head, and set it on her dresser. He ran his hand through his hair, and then his knee kissed her bed on the corner, making dip it. She turned and watched his lean frame in the shadows, watched him crawling with both confidence and uncertainty on the mattress.

It wasn't the first time they'd been on the same bed. It wasn't new. She couldn't count how many dumb wrestling matches or arguments had taken place on his or her bed during high school. Sometimes even now they'd talk there, share advice, or dumb stories. There'd been a few tenser, more confusing occurrences as of late. But, this…this was it's own category.

She was on her back again, and he was on his shoulder beside her, letting the line of his chest press into her.

"Casey," he breathed. It was almost a question.

"Derek," she said solidly, looking at him.

_Okay, so we're clear now, _she thought. She was Casey. He was Derek. They were still lying together. Still doing this craziness.

She was breaking Cosmo dating rules for sure (if you could even call what they were doing dating)--but, this time, when his hand brushed her bare shoulder, rubbing, she didn't stop him. She didn't pull away.

His eyes flickered, like he was surprised. Maybe like he hadn't thought past this part. He was Derek after all; it's not like planning was his thing.

She could see a softness in his eyes under the shadows. "Is this okay?" he asked.

"Unh huh."

"S'good."

Her thoughts drifted to weeks before.

_I just want you feel good,_ he'd said to her as he massaged her on her bed.

She remembered, in that hidden box of things about Derek she found hot-confusing-and/or-tender, how good and bad it had made her feel. Good, because, _duh,_ this was Derek. He had nice, big hands and he knew how to use them. But, bad, because _duh_, this was Derek, her stepbrother. And, seriously, weren't these things illegal in most states?

Derek's breathing pulled her back to the present.

"I…" He blinked, like his own thoughts were running fuzzily in his head. "Don't really know how to do this with you."

"I like things soft and sweet, and slow."

"I know. I know you, but…in theory…"

He trailed off and to normal people's ears this didn't make any sense .But, she wasn't normal. Nothing about this was.

She'd read the book of Derek so many times it was boring, and his pages were worn, and scribbled on with red ink. She knew every single step of the D-Prowl, every lame, manufactured move, as well as every move that actually was smooth, that she still fell for despite herself. She knew when the mood was set for him with a date, how his eyes would darken softly and he'd go in for the kill. She knew all these things. She knew what he liked and what he didn't and what he loved.

But, that was in theory. It was completely different to put theory into practice, to see his eyes dark and soft and realize he was looking only at her.

She turned and the mattress creaked as she faced him. Their knees bumped and she reached for his face. She stroked his cheek, (and, _oh God, this is Derek_), trying to show him how she liked to be touched. Softly. Sweetly. Slowly. She slid her fingers through his hair, because she knew that was how _he_ liked to be touched, letting her fingernails scrape gently against his scalp. His eyelashes fluttered and opened with unveiled contentment. "You feel so good."

_You, too_.

No way she was saying that aloud though. His ego was big enough as it was, no matter how good he felt right now.

He slid his hand up her forearm, looped it around her wrist, and then kissed gently by her pulse. She shivered slightly at how tender it was.

"Derek," she whispered again, surprised.

"Casey," he said firmly.

She nodded, slipped her arm over his shoulder, and kissed his jaw. Her eyes dropped shyly (but not shyly, it was weird), until she felt his hand on her waist, squeezing, and they traveled back. She stared at his shoulder, then his chin where she'd kiss him, and then he was leaning in, pressing his mouth to her cheek.

"This is so crazy," she breathed.

"Yeah."

His hand moved to her shoulder, pulled her to him so their chests touched, and kissed by her ear. She sighed, and her shoulder shrugged instinctively as his lips traveled her neck with slow, hesitant brushes. Dimly, she wondered when he'd psychically deduced that that was exactly where she liked to be kissed.

He turned her on her back, and it was bossy, but gentle. She ran her hands down his torso and felt the muscles moving and stiffening beneath her fingers, felt the nerves coming off of him just as fast they were coming off of her. He sighed, nuzzled by her throat, and it was like they couldn't look each other in the eyes (because, again this was damn crazy), but couldn't stop touching each other either.

"_DUDE! NEW HIGH SCORE!" _Ralph shrieked from downstairs.

They both jerked back.

"Derek," she said softly.

"Yeah?"

"Get Ralph out of my house."

"My thoughts exactly."

His eyes crinkled at the sides, and she wasn't completely sure, but it looked like his cheeks were pinking. It was damn cute. "But, he did save my ass today. Again. Besides," His hand smoothed her shoulder, and his eyes dipped. "In high school we always used to have to make out secretly in the house, even with all that noise, and clutter."

"Who? You and Ralph…?"

"Hilarious."

"Because, _I_ always had a little more class than that."

"Right: classy, McPrincess Pants," Derek said, rolling his eyes. "How could I forget?"

Casey rolled her eyes, but her lips quirked despite herself. Sure, it was annoying, and more than a little obnoxious that Ralph had blasted through their 'moment'-- but it was also somewhat of a relief to have something so openly awkward and unromantic happen. It took some of the pressure off.

"Snark all you want, but it's not happening," she said firmly. Her hand wandered and rubbed at his chest. "Plus, I want a first date. For real."

"I know."

"I'M AT THE TOP LEVEL!"

"D, YOU GOTTA CHECK THIS OUT!" Sam cried

"Ugh, okay," Casey sighed, pulling back and shedding any gratefulness for the distraction. "Now, I'm not even in the mood to tease you anymore."

"Yeah, I should probably check out that new level."

She smacked his head.

"Oww. I was kidding….kind of…."

She reached over and pulled on her lamp, the light flooding through the room. When she turned back to Derek, his shirt was halfway on, and she watched the muscles of his abs pretty openly, before blushing and glancing away.

"Hey," she heard him mumble.

Her eyes slid back over. "Yeah?"

"I uh," he shrugged his shoulders, "Um, tonight was,-" He scrubbed the back of his head, "I really-"

"Me, too," she said, cutting him off.

His lips quirked, that warm, soft smirk that always made stomach flip, as he stood from the bed.

"Sam's heading back tomorrow. Then we can…"

He trailed off, almost like he was expecting her to finish that sentence, and her eyebrows quirked. "Go on a _real_ date."

"Right. Exactly."

"You are not skipping bases," Casey said, "No matter how hot your chest is." His eyes lit bemusedly as she went on, "And, we're not skipping talking either."

"Did you hear that?" Derek asked, his eyes darting suddenly, "I think it was the sound of the 'mood' being killed."

Casey narrowed her eyes at him. "Right. Ralphy squealing about Babe Raider doesn't squelch the mood for you, but the idea of romance and talking completely thaws you out."

He nodded. "Pretty much." Casey rolled her eyes. "You know I don't do 'talking'."

She shrugged, her voice casual, but genuine as she mumbled, "I thought you did pretty well tonight."

His eyes jumped to hers, surprised.

"I liked the flowers, too." She scrunched her face sheepishly, "You know. Before I trashed them."

"Yeah, well, you know, whatever." He shrugged one shoulder and swallowed. She could tell he didn't exactly enjoy or appreciate her pointing out his thoughtfulness. "You're always blabbing about colors and flowers and rainbows, so…"

"It was sweet," she murmured.

"_Don't _say that. That's the first 'rule' or whatever," he grumbled and Casey just smirked.

"Okay, D," she said with a sigh, "Have fun in the man cave. I need some sleep if I'm gonna properly entertain you tomorrow."

It was his turn for his eyebrows to spike.

She huffed. "_Not _like that, Mo Mo."

He smirked. "I'll pick you up from work."

"Mmmkay."

She sighed, watching him steadily while he watched back, before smiling and turning off the light.

***

"I have a date tonight."

Kellie looked up tiredly from the chart she was filling out. "Right, Case. And, I have a zombie baby growing on my back."

Casey bunched her brows. "No. For real, Kel. I'm going on a date. With a man. With…" God, it felt weird to even say it, "Derek."

"Derek doesn't count," Kellie said over a yawn.

"Well, yeah, normally, but-"

"Oh, my god, have you seen my earring?" Kellie squeaked suddenly. She reached for her left ear lobe, frowning. "I _just_ had it in. I know I did."

"Kellie," Casey said.

"I mean seriously. How does that happen? You wear earrings everyday, it's not like there's a new trick to them, or anything…."

"Kellie."

"And, yet, _still_, they manage to just slip out, or jump out, or dig a secret tunnel out of your ears sometimes-"

"I'M DATING MY STEPBROTHER, SO COULD YOU PLEASE LISTEN TO ME?!"

If they'd been having a private conversation before then, that officially ended it. Casey heard the screeching of cart wheels, the squeak of stopped sneakers, and turned to find quite an audience watching.

"Heh, yeah, yeah, I love that song," Kellie said uncomfortably. She moved forward a few steps and then started bopping her head and snapping her fingers to an imaginary beat, "_Yeah, I'm dating my stepbrother,/ oh, brother, oh, brother, /so won't you, won't you, listen,/ hey, hey, hey, listen to me_."

Casey grimaced, but Kellie's ear-torturing serenade seemed to be convincing enough. Aside from some disgruntled moans, everyone pretty much went back to their work.

"Is that a country song?" Teddy asked, squinting as he appeared beside them.

"Ugh." Kellie huffed and pushed him aside, before dragging Casey into the break room.

***

"You're dating Derek?!" Kellie screeched as soon as the door closed behind them.

"Well," Casey titled her head side to side, considering, "It depends on how you define-"

"Are you going on _a date _with _Derek_, alone?" Kellie said over her, slowly as if speaking to a child.

Casey flushed sheepishly. "Um…yeah, kind of definitely. I know, I know…" She swatted her hands. "It's weird and creepy and totally inappropriate."

"_Not_ the words I would choose," Kellie interjected. "I was thinking more 'hot' and 'it's about time' and mostly, 'Really? Casey? Actually doing something this bollywonkers?'"

"Bollywonkers?" Casey said, squinting. "What does 'bollywonkers' mean?"

"You. You are what bollywonkers means."

"…"

"I can't--I mean--how? I mean-- when?" Kellie finally squeaked out.

"Well…"

She talked over her. "I mean, just what? Twenty four hours ago he was playing tongue tango with Rebecca and you were throwing his flowers in the trash…"

"Yeah, funny story…"

"And, now…what, exactly?"

"I'm not really sure, Kel. I mean." Casey worried her bottom lip. "We were outside and we were arguing. And, then he started saying all these really stupid, sweet things about how he wasn't with Rebecca, but he was actually moping over me, and the wanting and the eyes and then---I don't know, I just kissed him."

"_You _kissed him?"

"I know. I _know_, right?"

"And, so now what?"

"Now…" Casey blew out a breath, "Now, we're going on a date."

"This is…wow," was all Kellie said.

Casey was pretty stunned herself. Kellie wasn't exactly known for her somberness, and she'd been constantly, obnoxiously pestering Casey about getting together with Derek for years now. It was weird to be on the other side of…bollywonkers.

"So…" Kellie sighed. "What about his job offer? And your family? And, the, well, black hole of social things that is residency?"

"I don't know," Casey said honestly, "We don't know. I mean we know, but we don't know--we just sort of…I guess we didn't really…"

Kellie's eyes widened expectantly.

"I don't actually remember us solving any of the problems," Casey finally said, "We just sort of decided that they were there, and that they were huge, and that there were a lot of things that really, really annoyed us about each other and then…"

"You kissed him?"

"Pretty much, yeah."

"Well." Kellie snorted. "That's one way of doing it, I guess." Casey grimaced and Kellie continued on. "I mean, I'm happy for you guys. Honestly. As weird and messed as both of you are, I always kind of thought you made the most least-unsense for each other." Casey squinted. "I just, wow, of all times to figure that out…? This probably wouldn't have been one of my top ten months."

"Yeah, well, that makes two of us." Casey let out a nervous breath, and then glanced back at her friend suddenly. "Um, Kel. I know how you like to…" She chose her words carefully. "…disseminate information-"

"Pfft. My lips are sealed," Kellie said, "I mean seriously. Half the fun of spreading rumors is warping them into something bizarre and ridiculous. This…" she gestured vaguely towards Casey, "Just makes it way too easy."

"Thanks, Kellie," Casey said dryly, "That's really helpful."

She nodded. "I try."

Casey chewed on her lip again, face scrunched as she looked imploringly to Kellie.

"Should I be freaking out right now? I feel like I should be freaking out right now."

"No. You are not going to freak out. You're going to embrace the bollywonkers," Kellie began, slipping her arm around her, "And, go out on a date with Derek. And, let him kiss you, and say all those corny, dumb things that guys say when they're into you. And then--then you freak out."

***

Bizarrely, after Kellie's 'pep' talk, she didn't freak out. Well, not any more than usual anyway. She'd backed into Dr. Stewart in the hallway, who'd then fallen on an intern (who'd been already weeping in a corner), which was awkward. At lunch she'd spilled vitamin water all over her pants and had had to change them. Insert a few bumbling conversations with Dr. Doom and it was shaping out to be a pretty regular day.

She'd just ran out to her car for a file she prayed to God she hadn't left at home (also a regular routine), when her phone rang.

She gasped and reached across the front seat for it.

"Yeah, it's me," she said absently.

"Good. That's, uh, who I was aiming for."

"Derek?"

"Yeah."

Her breath caught a little. Mostly from the running, she was sure. Also, because they were almost-quasi -sort of dating each other now, and she wasn't sure how she was supposed to sound on the phone.

"How's it," she paused, trying to change her voice from something less running-panting to something more…_whatever _she was supposed sound like, "How's it going?"

"Good," he said slowly, "You okay? You sound kind of…ill, or something."

She grimaced. Definitely not the sexy phone voice she'd been going for. She scrunched her nose and gave the whole thing up. "I'm fine. Just rushing, is all," she said more normally.

"Oh, I could call back-"

"No, no, it's cool. I have a few minutes."

"Oh, okay, cool." She heard him clear his throat over the line, and then some rustling. "About tonight…"

She frowned and settled down in the passenger seat. "That doesn't sound promising."

He sighed. "Yeah. Sammy's got Monday off, and he's not here often, and he kind of invited himself over for another night. So…"

"No date then," she finished quietly.

He just made a small, grunting sound she couldn't distinguish. Which was odd, because she'd actually gotten pretty good at interpreting them.

She glanced a bit sullenly at her garment bag in the backseat and pushed away all those day dreams of his jaw dropping when he saw her.

"Case," he finally said, "You're quiet."

She shrugged. "S'okay. I understand. Plus, it's not like you get to see Sam that often."

"Yeah." She heard him sigh on the line. "I didn't want to cancel either…."

She squinted. She hadn't said that. Was she really that obvious?

"But, it's Sam and you know, the whole 'male code' thing."

"That's _still_ not funny, Derek."

"Still not funny to you; there's a difference."

Her lips quirked half-heartedly, and she almost worked up the energy to manufacture some snarky response, but gave up half way.

Derek cleared his throat again, and she sighed.

"So what are you guys doing then?" Casey finally asked, "Fart jokes? Cheerleader hunting?"

"You give us too much credit," Derek said dryly, "We were just planning on staying in actually. Maybe…getting a home cooked meal."

Casey arched her brow, even if she knew he couldn't see it. "And, who exactly would be providing this 'home cooked meal'?"

"Heh, well…"

_Ha,_ she thought to herself, _No eyes to bend me with._

But, he still had that voice. The really soft, almost raspy murmur that he always got when she was seconds away from giving in. It was the same voice he'd used to get her to grade-grub for him, or to share the blame when he threw that first party years ago. "_Casey_. I wouldn't ask, but--

"Pfft, yeah you would," she muttered with an eye roll. He'd had her at '_Casey_.' "Fine. I'll do it. For _Sam. _And, maybe even Ralph a little. But, not for you."

"Hey, now-"

"And, the house better be clean when I get there."

"We both know that's not happening."

"Well, if that's not happening than nothing _else _is happening," she said, enunciating carefully.

"Unh uh, no way. I'm not falling for that one. If I fall for it now, I fall for it over and over again."

"Derek," she said.

"Casey," he said back.

She huffed.

"The house is already clean," he said finally. "Sam's idea, not mine. And, not to impress you and _not_ because I'm susceptible to chick blackmail."

Casey bit back a smile. Because she knew Derek-speak, and she knew that what he really meant was pretty much the opposite of everything he'd just said.

She briefly toyed with the idea of thanking him, but decided that in these cases, the best way to reward Derek was not to reward him at all.

"Ass," she settled on.

"Freak."

She smirked. That was more like it.

"I'll see you when I get home," she said more softly, letting a little--just a little--of her desire to see him slip into it.

He sighed into the phone. "Okay. Bye."

"Bye."

***

When she got home, she was greeted with flowers. And, not from whom she'd expected. "Josh?" she said with a surprised smile.

"Beautiful flowers for a beautiful lady."

She snorted, that goofy, giggly snort she used to do in grade school. "That is, oddly, the most romantic thing that's happened to me in a while."

Casey grinned and took the flowers from him.

"That was totally my line," Derek said.

"Taking credit from a teenager now?" She sent him a sideways glance. "That's a new low."

Josh turned and smirked at Derek, and Casey mouthed a quick 'thank you' over his head. He answered with a smooth wink, and it actually took her a stunned moment to realize that it was directed at her. Her with the hospital hair and the smudged makeup.

She sniffed. "Is that…food?"

Derek shrugged. "Yeah, we ordered in. Italian."

"Italian? That's my favorite."

"Yeah, we know," Josh said, "My idea."

Derek tilted his head in concession. "That actually was his idea."

Casey just blinked slightly as Derek came behind her to help her with her coat.

"Okay," she said slowly, "Um, am I on Candid Camera?"

"We just knew you were pretty beat, so, you know…" he was murmuring over her shoulder as he took his time with her coat, and she got distracted by the vibration of his voice against her neck.

"…go ahead and order," she heard him finish after her brain came back.

"Also, my idea."

"That was not your idea," Derek said, "That was totally mine."

"Yeah," Josh said, "Except not."

Casey swallowed a giggle at their ridiculous squabble.

"Would you just go make sure Sam and Ralph haven't burnt down the kitchen?" Derek glanced down at her, "They're reheating it. It, uh, got a little cold."

"Yeah, sorry," Casey sighed. "I'm late. As usual."

"S'okay."

Josh was finally heading back towards the kitchen and Derek ducked down and pressed a warm kiss to the nape of her neck. She sighed softly, instinctively, and turned to him.

"You planned this, didn't you?"

"I don't do 'planning' or 'talking' or 'romance'," he said slowly, carefully. Casey cocked a brow as he continued. "And, besides, trust me. If he were anyone else besides maybe Santa Claus or Wayne Gretzky, I would have kicked Sam out of the house hours ago."

She glanced over his shoulders (still no company) and then lifted her hands between them, setting palms on the plane of his chest. "Why can't you ever say things sweetly to me? Like 'I care about you' and 'I planned this for you' and 'I wish I could have spent the night with you?'"

He squirmed slightly, which had really been her whole point, before rolling his eyes, and tugging her hands gently off of his chest. "Stop that."

"Make me."

"Fine."

He leaned in and for a moment she thought he was going to kiss her right then and there. Instead, he inhaled and blew two puffs of air into her eyes. She blinked, grimacing. "What the-? _De-rek_. Why would you even do that?"

"I can combat any of your mushiness with my jerkiness. Just test me."

She rubbed her eyes and frowned at him as he headed for the kitchen.

***

"D-Rock?" Josh said, laughing slightly, "That's a joke, right?"

"Hey, hey, hey." Derek set his cup down jerkily on the table. "I'll have you know we were pretty darn cool back then, okay?"

"Yeah," Josh said sarcastically, " 'Pretty darn cool' sounds really rockin', Coach."

Derek simmered. "We were rock gods."

"_Ohmm," _Sam nearly chocked on his soda. "That might be a _slight_ embellishment.'

"More like a fairy tale." Casey snorted, but off Derek's warning look, quickly fought it back. "They were, you know,…alright."

"Alright?" Derek said, staring at her, "We were amazing. Except…" His nose scrunched, like he was thinking of something he'd rather forget, "This one chick lead singer we had. Totally lame and off key…"

"_Der-ek."_

She smacked his shoulder (they were sitting next to each other), and was annoyed to realize how fake/ flirty the hit was. Derek's brows bunched, like he'd noticed it, too, and she decided she'd have to hit him much harder next time.

"Woah, woah, wait a minute," Ralph said confusedly, "The only female lead I remember was Casey? Was there like…another one when I was away or something?"

Derek groaned, shaking his head, and Sam rolled his eyes. "Yeah, Ralph. Marlene. Forgot to mention it to you."

"Oh, okay."

"_Casey_ was the lead singer in your rock band?" Josh asked, gawking.

"Heh." Derek snorted. "Please, do I look that geeky? It was just a temporary thing. A moment of utter desperation."

"_Hey_," Casey cried, "I totally rocked that stage."

"I don't doubt it," Josh said, his eyes wide and fuzzy.

"Pfft. Please," Derek grumbled, "Casey couldn't 'rock' anything. Except maybe a pole or a wall she's accidentally stumbling into."

"Oh! You-" she raised her hand again, as if to strike him, and he grabbed her wrists, pulling her back towards his chair. "Ugh," she groaned, "How do I _always_ fall for that?"

"I have no idea."

"Let me go."

"Never."

He turned her over, so she was halfway in his lap, halfway dangling from her chair, and she huffed, trying to jimmy herself free. This continued for a few moments, before she realized that everyone was silent, save for Derek taunting her.

"Why are you guys looking at each other like that?" Josh asked finally, squinting.

"Huh, a-what-now?" Casey said, jerking her eyes away from Derek, and fighting back a blush.

Derek instantly released her, and Casey hurried into her chair, her eyes darting across the table. Josh looked confused, Ralph oblivious, and Sam was wearing a knowing smirk.

She panicked and then did the only thing she could think of: She smacked the hell out of his chest. Derek hissed, grunted and then fell solidly to the ground.

"Ah, god!" Derek cried, "What is wrong with you, woman?"

She winched internally, but tried to force a steeliness to her voice. "Oh, I just--can't stand you."

"Well, that's apparent," he said, squinting at her.

Casey glanced awkwardly back at the others. "So…dessert?"

***

"You guys might want to keep the eye-sex to a minimum around children," Sam whispered to her and Derek as they were leaving the kitchen.

"We were _not_ having eye -sex," Casey hissed, her face now entirely red.

"Right. It's totally normal for stepsibs to grope and stare at each other in the kitchen."

"We were _not _groping," Casey hissed again.

"Can we just not talk about this? Ever," Derek said uncomfortably. "I don't do PDA. That was not PDA. Case closed."

"Chill, dude. It's me. If you guys are together, or whatever now. It's totally cool."

"It is not cool. It is the opposite of cool." He glowered at Casey, " Could you just keep your hands off of me, maybe?"

She gawked. "Me? Me keep _my_ hands off of _you_? You practically pulled me into your lap."

"Pfft. You're the one who started all the flirty shoulder hitting."

"I was not flirty shoulder hitting."

"You so were."

"Okay, okay, break it up," Sam said, tiredly stepping between them. "Let's just hang out and try to act like mildly normal human beings, okay? For one night."

"Fine," they both muttered.

***

"…so then Derek dressed up like a girl," Casey finished amidst raucous laughter. Well, except from Derek's corner anyway.

"Okay, okay, alright, it's all hilarious and outrageous, hehe haw."

"Coach," Josh said, "Just…dude."

"Hey, I ended up hooking with that girl by the way. On this very couch."

"Was this before or after you dressed up like a woman?" Sam asked over a laugh.

Derek just groaned.

"Oh, now, Dereka, don't be so hard on yourself." Casey reached over and gave him the softest, fake- flirty smack she could muster. Just to annoy him.

His eyes narrowed. "You know, you're throwing a lot of stones for someone who accidentally hit on another woman in college."

"Derek!" she shrieked, flushing. "You promised you'd never bring that up!"

"No, no, you must have me confused with _Dereka._ Because I, Derek, would never promise such a thing."

She gasped, and then literally hid behind a pillow as the males guffawed around her.

"No, way," Ralph said, "No freakin' way, Case. You hit on a chick?"

"In my defense," she said, raising an indignant pointer finger, "She had very broad shoulders."

"And a delightful smile." Derek sighed wistfully. "It's a shame. I always hoped you two crazy kids would work it out."

"I am going to murder you," Casey promised across the couch. "Literally murder you in your sleep."

"Casey," Sam said, shaking his head slowly, "How could you not tell?"

"She had broad shoulders!"

"And, breasts," Derek said before bursting into another fit of laughter.

"You guys are crazy," Josh said, leaning back in the recliner, "I change my mind. I totally would have hung out with you. You know… 'back in the day'," he said pointedly to Derek.

"Okay, okay that's it, squirt!"

Casey yelped and then giggled as Derek leapt from the couch, taking chase after the teen throughout the living room.

***

_Why am I here?_

Casey moaned slightly as she shifted on the couch. Last she remembered Ralph and Josh were (much to her horror) exchanging fart jokes and then…well, she guessed she had been pretty exhausted. She distantly remembered setting her head on Derek's shoulder before he shrugged her off, and then settling for Sam's instead. And, now…

"Hey, Spacey."

She blinked, rubbed at her eyes, and then slowly, slowly, Derek's form came into view. He was crouched on the carpet in front of her.

"I fell asleep, didn't I?"

He smirked. "What tipped you off?"

"M'sorry. I know it was supposed to be a "bondy" night or whatever."

"Ugh." Derek made a face. "Dudes do not bond, okay? Plus, once you passed out we got to play Babe Raider for like three hours."

"Mmm, how touching."

Her eyes fluttered shut, and then she felt his warm hand on her shoulder, rubbing and rocking her gently. "Come on, Case. It's time for beddy bye."

"Unnngh, no. Can't move. Don't wanna."

She whined and turned from him, hiding her face in a pillow.

"Casey."

"Unh uh."

She felt him hover over her, then slip his arms around her like he was wrapping her up, before he grunted and scooped her against him. There was this gravity-free moment and then she was rising with him as his feet padded the carpet. The shock of it made her brain warm up, her eyes open a little wider. "What are you doing?" she breathed against his shoulder.

"I'm taking you to bed."

He took the first step, and she quirked her brows, but didn't question him, slipping her arms instinctively around his neck. "You better not drop me," she mumbled.

Another few steps.

"Heh. Trust me. I've done this plenty of times before. I can handle it." He smirked. "No matter how heavy you've gotten."

She scowled him. Mostly because that was an assy thing to say. Hands down. But, also because he had this annoying habit of slipping in stupid statements in the midst of doing something sweet.

He wasn't Noel. Or even Max. She didn't expect him to do grand, sweeping gestures and carry her across thresholds. In a way he still wasn't (there was no music, or dramatic moment, or candles in the background). But at the same time he really was. She couldn't help but think of all the other times he'd found her on that couch, completely unconscious, and had carried her up these steps. It wasn't new. She hadn't just figured it out. But, there was something utterly different about being awake for it. Feeling the warmth and strength of his arms. Feeling his gentle gaze on her.

"You're quiet," he whispered in her door way.

She wanted to kiss him, but she'd already done it first (which according to that quiz she'd taken was a bad move). So she leaned in instead, stroking the back of his neck suggestively.

"It's just…" She sighed. "I don't know."

His face scrunched, but then smoothed out as he read her features, like he was reading her.

"I like it when you kiss me first," he mumbled.

"I know you do," she whispered almost into his mouth.

"Yes," he said, "So give me what I want."

"What you want? I thought what you wanted were bimbos and blondes in short skirts-"

"And, you," he said over her with a smirk, "My lone exception."

She was a part-time feminist, and by moral principle she hated whenever Derek got his way, but this was _her_ lone exception. And, the thought that he wanted her so badly, despite all her many dorky flaws, was sort of irresistible.

So she broke Cosmo rule number two, pressed her mouth against his and gave him what he wanted.

It was softer than the first, like she was testing him, which she was. She left teasing touches on his mouth and then pulled back. (Because she was difficult, too, and it was her one deepest pleasure to frustrate him, to make him work for something.) He leaned in, his mouth chasing her instinctively, and she ducked away only for a moment, before letting him win.

"Difficult," he breathed before kissing her again.

"Arrogant," she whispered before another peck.

He shifted her against him, closer, and it was awkward, but pleasant as their mouths met again. Soft, sweet, shy kisses, that left the strangest, oddest notion in her chest that together they made the most least un-sense. That maybe they should have started this long ago.

It just worked.

It just…_shit_, it felt good.

When he pulled back, Derek was breathless. "You are so…"

"_OH, YEAH!! WE BEAT THE GAME!!" _Ralph shrieked.

Casey huffed.

"Out. Of. My house."

"Tomorrow," he promised.

***


	9. Chapter 9

**I can never thank my reviewers enough. Seriously, I read and appreciate every comment you guys leave me. If they were edible, I'd eat them ;)  
**

**This story is nearing the end now. Which is a little sad, because I've had a lot of fun writing it. Also, this chapter's not all that happy ( :(!) Sorry. But, I promise to make up for everything in the last few parts.**

**Random Note: Someone asked me if I got my inspiration for the hospital scenes / characters from Scrubs. Actually, while I have found the few episodes I've seen pretty amusing, no, not really. I'm actually a pretty big Grey's Anatomy fan (for those of you haven't already figured that out). Of course the show is far from a realistic model, but I find it insanely enjoyable so, there ya go…**

****This part begins right after the last chapter...**

*****  
**

**Tomorrow, Part 8**

*******

Making out with Derek was…

Surreal.

Especially in the dark. With her back pressed up against his headboard. With Ralph, Sam--and possibly still Josh--gaming downstairs. With his hand on her hip, and her mouth on his neck ( which she never really did, honestly) and well--_with Derek._

"Yes," he breathed lowly as she kissed by his collarbone. "I like that."

She blushed.

It was strange, but they'd taken to telling each other clearly and explicitly what they enjoyed. Each time Casey stumbled onto another "yes", it brought a flush to her cheeks. Not only from shyness (which was both weird and nice and she wondered whether it would go away). But, also because, again, she knew everything about Derek…except for these new, tiny, more intimate things. Things she'd never particularly thought she'd want to know about, but now really did.

"What?" he asked when she was still for a moment.

"Derek, this is so-"

"I know," he said over her.

He brushed stray hair from her cheek and Casey sighed. "No. You don't. I promised myself I'd never do this. Especially with you. In your bed. Like every other chick on the block." He quirked his brows. "Plus, Ralph and Sam and _Josh_ are downstairs."

His head dipped in and out of a patch of light and she caught his bemused expression. "A) Who do you think are, Cinderella? Angelina Jolie? I wasn't exactly planning this either. And B) No one can hear us here. It's the quietest spot upstairs."

"A)," Casey said back, shifting in his lap, "I'm 'Beauty' and you're the 'Beast'." He snorted. "And, B) Again, I _don't_ do this. You haven't even taken me out yet."

"No," Derek conceded, "But I got wasted over you and passed out on a bench."

"Charming," she deadpanned.

"I fought a frog for you, too," he whispered, "…I think."

That was cute. And, damnit, kind of charming. But, she wasn't giving in again. Not anymore…hopefully, anyway.

Well, maybe just a little-

"Stop it," she mumbled halfheartedly as his hand kneaded her shoulder.

He rolled his eyes. "Were you born this nutty? Or was it something in the water?"

"Derek."

"Just one more kiss."

"That's what you said twenty minutes ago. Now I'm still not asleep, we're in your bedroom, and you're not wearing a shirt."

He shrugged. "You could take yours off, too…? Make it more fair?"

She sighed, ducked her head and tried to hide the amused--yet, still agitated--tilt of her lips. "I have to go to sleep. For real this time." He frowned. "And, you need to entertain your friends."

He exhaled, then leaned down closely to speak. Close-talking annoyed her when everyone else on the planet did it, but, in this moment, not him. "When are you getting off tomorrow?"

"Late," she said softly, "As usual."

"Late like the-kids-are-tucked-in-and-ready-for-bed late? Or late like-after-the-After-After-party late?"

"Mmmm," She shrugged and he kept rubbing her shoulder, which felt nice. "Probably just in time for the first After party."

"Huh."

"What about this weekend?"

"Can't," he said and frowned, "Conference, remember? I'll be gone for a couple of weeks."

She stiffened. "What?"

"I told you. You've just been-"

"Busy. Right, I got it."

He sighed and scooted back slightly, sitting up. "Yeah, whatever. So anyway, we gotta go ahead and squeeze this date in so we can get it out of the way before I go."

"How romantic," she said dryly.

"We can do whatever you want," he said calmly, "Wine and crushed roses and singing unicorns and all that jazz. Let's just _do_ it, already."

They weren't touching anymore, which kind of pricked at her nerves, but she ignored it. "Fine. I can pencil you in for Thursday…?"

He blinked. "I'm leaving on Friday."

"I know. I know. But, it's pretty much the only day this week that's even slightly available. Unless you want to hit up McDonald's at three o'clock in the morning? And no," she said instantly, "That's not an option."

"How about Burrito Shack?"

"_Derek._"

"Fine," he said with a sigh, "It's a date. But, you can't back out."

She leaned over, set a smooth palm on his tense shoulder and kissed his cheek. "I won't. I promise."

***

"You promised?" Kellie blew out a long breath, "Total kiss of death."

"_Secrets, secrets are no fun," _Teddy sung, springing up beside them.

Casey and Kellie arched simultaneous eyebrows as Dan appeared next to Teddy, too. He was nodding slightly, like he was at least moderately interested. Or perhaps just humoring Teddy.

"What are you idiots even talking about?" Kellie finally asked.

Dan waved a tired hand in their direction. "This Ya Ya Sisterhood, or whatever you've got going on here."

"Yeah," Teddy said, "It's all, whisper-whisper-giggle-giggle with you two lately."

"Hey," Casey said indignantly, "I do _not _giggle."

Dan snorted and Casey glared at him before Kellie chimed in.

"Giggles and non-giggles aside, some things are meant to be kept secret."

Dan's eyes popped. "I'm sorry, I'm confused. You are _Kellie_, right? Kellie Martin?"

Casey watched Kellie's eyes narrow, watched her and Dan exchange the usual verbal jabs with Teddy instigating, and sighed. As annoying as these 'idiots' were, they were her friends. And, years of living with Derek and Edwin had taught her enough to realize that Dan and Teddy were probably--albeit very, _very_ unconsciously--concerned about whatever was going on.

"I'm seeing someone," Casey blurted.

All three pairs of eyes jumped to her, and Kellie finally released Teddy from a headlock. The blond gaped at her as if to say, '_Are you really about to-"_

"Someone I'd rather _not_ identify at this point," Casey said firmly, staring right back at Kellie. "And, it's new and it's confusing…and it just…is, okay? That's the big whopping secret."

Teddy squinted, rubbing the back of his abused neck. "Is he…imaginary again?"

"No," Casey said tiredly, "Not imaginary again."

"So things didn't work out for you and 'Juan Pablo'?" Dan asked with a smirk.

Casey narrowed her eyes. "No," she said tightly, "Juan and I grew apart."

"Oh, god. It's not-not," Teddy shuddered, "Dr. Doom, is it?"

"Ewww, much!" Kellie shrieked. She smacked his shoulder. "What are you, mental?"

Dan shrugged. "It would explain how she landed on the fast track all of a sudden."

"So would my exceptional talent and tireless work ethic," Casey said icily.

Dan held his hands out innocently. "Hey. Thought we were just brainstorming here. And, we all know there's no 'bad ideas in brainstorming.'"

Dan looked to the others for support. Teddy nodded instantly, while Kellie paused, before slowly conceding and nodding herself.

Casey huffed. "I'm getting new friends. Like right now."

"Hey, hey, slow it down, McyDees," Teddy said, slipping his arm over her retreating shoulder. "We're just messing around. You know we got nothing but highly dysfunctional love for you."

Casey shrugged him off, but her mood considerably thawed as the others followed her down the corridor.

"Yeah, and honestly?" Dan said, "Whoever he is, I'm just surprised your psycho stepbro hasn't slaughtered him yet." Casey and Kellie exchanged knowing looks as he went on. "I mean, that's obviously the reason me and you never worked it out."

"Uh, sure," Casey said. "That and the fact that you're obnoxious, pre-historic, and I can't stand you half the time."

"Eh," Dan titled his head in consideration, "That, too."

"Just let her go." Teddy gave Dan a pat on his shoulder and the other male scowled at him. "Like a butterfly. Let her spread her wings and prepare to fly. And, if she should return, you were truly meant to be."

Casey scrunched her nose and Dan sent Teddy an equally baffled look. Kellie just rolled her eyes. "Okay, Ted, those were _literally _lyrics from a Mariah Carey song."

"I'm just saying. There's a chance that she'll Always be your Baby, but-"

"Okay," Casey said with a sigh, "And _scene._"

"What?" Teddy said defensively, "She has a powerful voice. Soulful, really."

"_Anyway_," Kellie said over him, "Casey told, well, let's just call him Binkie…"

"Binkie," Dan said, nodding. "I like that."

Casey rolled her eyes as Kellie continued. "Right, well, Casey _promised_ Binkie they'd go out Thursday night."

"You promised him?" Teddy gasped, "Who are you, Santa Claus? You can't make promises in residency."

"I know, I know," Casey said with a groan, "I broke a rule."

"You broke The Rule," Kellie said.

Dan shook his head. "The only rule I bother to follow."

"That's not an exaggeration," Kellie said tiredly, "I'm surprised he hasn't been arrested yet."

Dan simply shrugged, smirking.

"This is going to work out," Casey said determinedly, "I don't know how yet. But, I'm going to make this work."

"Casey," Kellie said softly.

"I'm _going to make this work._"

Kellie's eyes widened and she stepped back, nodding. Teddy sort of hid behind Dan as the taller doctor mumbled. "Alright, Case. Knock yourself out. But, with the fellowship nominations coming up, you _literally_ can't say 'no' to anything Doom asks. Anything. I mean, even torturing babies."

"I heard he actually asked a resident to do that once," Kellie whispered.

Casey sighed and folded her arms. "Really, Kel, _really_?"

Beat.

"No. Not really."

"I didn't think so."

***

Fortunately, Dr. Drew hadn't asked her to torture babies (not yet, anyway).

Unfortunately, he had asked her to do pretty much everything else. All while hovering over her like a sarcastic, overly critical hawk.

It made for a pretty 'pleasant' day.

But, Dan--and she hated admitting this--had been right. She couldn't say 'no' to him. Not this week. Not while he literally held her career in his hands.

So she'd smiled, slipped on her patented can-do attitude and worked her ass off. At one point she was pretty sure she'd damn near walked on water…before collapsing on her face and knocking over a supply tray. But, really, that was nothing new. It was pretty much required for something spastic like that to happen before her shift ended.

She pulled into the driveway around ten and was only mildly surprised to find Derek and the 'boys' outside playing really, really bad basketball.

"Oh, yeah," Ralph cried, "Nothing but net!"

Sam rolled his eyes. "You can only say that if it goes in, Ralphy."

He frowned. "Oh."

"Don't mind me," Casey chirped pointedly--especially to Derek, who was hanging from the rim like a moron, "Just drowning in files and bags. I don't need any help."

Derek jumped from the hoop and smirked at her. "That's right. Make way for Miss Modern, Independent woman."

"You are not reverse-psychologizing your way out of helping m-"

The bags were out of her arms before she could even finish.

"We still on for Thursday?" he whispered to her.

"Yeah," Casey said quickly, stiffly, "I promised, didn't I?"

Derek looked skeptical, but didn't vocalize anything as they reached the front door. She could hear Ralph and Sam jogging up behind them.

"Thought I was gonna miss you before I headed out," Sam said.

"Yeah," Ralph said, like he'd just discovered the cure to something, "You work like, _a lot_, Case."

"It's called being a productive member of society," Derek muttered.

His voice was clipped, more agitated than usual and Casey frowned as he closed the door behind them. She glanced at him questioningly, but he was busy setting her bags by the steps.

"It was fun seeing you again," Sam said, pulling her attention back to him. "I've been missing the awkward in my life."

Casey snorted and then smiled genuinely. "I'll take that as a compliment."

Sam pulled her into a warm hug, and she wrapped her arms around his back until she heard Derek grumble, "Okay, okay, three seconds, kiddies. Time's up."

"I didn't know there was a time limit now," Sam quipped.

"Well, there is. You should read the papers more."

Sam rolled his eyes at him, but then proceeded to pull him into a "man-hug", back slap and all, before doing the same with Ralph.

"It's been real, guys." Ralph said dramatically, but apparently sincerely. He set his palm over his chest, "I mean, really, really-"

"Unh uh," Derek said, "None of that, okay. We are not chicks."

"And, neither are women," Casey inserted.

"Says the chick."

Casey scowled at him and he, predictably, ignored her.

"Sam, do you mind dropping Ralph off on your way? Me and Casey need to do something."

Ralph smirked. "Do something, huh?"

Sam promptly elbowed him in the stomach. "No prob, dude." He held out his fist and said, "Bros for life."

"Bro's for life," Derek said, giving him a fist pump.

Ralph raised his own fist, grinning. "Bros over hos…?"

"Annddd, now it's time for you to leave my house, Ralph," Casey said, pushing gently at his back, "…for kind of a while."

"Gotcha," Ralph said. He winked at her, like they were in on some private joke, and Casey squinted at him.

"Later, guys," Derek said.

"Later." "Peace out."

The door shut behind them, and she and Derek instantly turned towards each other. Casey arched her brow, mimicking Ralph playfully. "'Do' something, huh?'"

He sighed. "Nora's been calling like a collection agency. She said if we don't call her tonight, she's booking the first flight from California and staying for a month."

Casey rolled her eyes, mostly amused. "I guess it has been a while."

"Yup."

He frowned. Which was also weird. She'd be lying if she said he was ever excited about "Family Phone Time", but it was usually more of a good natured grumbling, not just…grumbling.

"You okay, hon?" she asked, slipping off her coat.

"Don't call me that," he said instantly, nose scrunching. "And, yeah, I'm fine. Why wouldn't I be?"

His back was towards her as he headed for the kitchen, and she followed, brows furrowed. "I dunno. You just seem…off, or something."

"Great, what's next?" he mumbled as he grabbed the speaker phone, "You gonna ask me 'what I'm thinking'?"

"Maybe," she said slowly.

She hoisted herself atop the island so she was comfy, but also so they were almost eye level with each other. He still seemed a little stiff, but didn't pull back when she scooted close to him. She set her hand on the crease of his neck and rubbed, making his eyes soften slightly. (Because, even if he always pretended he hated gestures like these, they could subdue him like a big baby).

But, then he looked down, mumbled "s'nothing", before clicking speed dial.

"Avoider," she muttered.

"Nagger," he said back.

It had a familiar hint of softness to it though, and she smiled despite herself.

"_CASEY??!!"_

"Yes, mom," Casey said amusedly, "It's me. Your long lost daughter."

"_And, did my long lost daughter lose her ability to pick up a phone?_"

"Tragic accident," Derek said, "We don't like to discuss it."

Casey sent him a look which, again, he ignored.

"_How *are* you? Are you okay?"_

"Everything's fine, mom," Casey said slowly and calmly, "It's just that work and life have been…" She trailed off and glanced at Derek contemplatively, "Well…a little crazy."

"_It's not Dr. Doom again, is it?_"

"No, mom. Not Dr. Doom. He's actually been pretty bearable. Well, for him anyway. I've just been working a lot."

"I'd liked to second that notion," Derek said, leaning into the speaker, "And, is there another, stronger word for 'a lot'?"

"Only for people with a vocabulary," Casey said sweetly.

Derek rolled his eyes as Nora inserted, "_I know, honey. It's gonna be hard until you get that fellowship. You just have to hang in there._"

"Right," Derek said, "Then maybe, just _maybe_ you can have a real life and not just a pretend one."

Casey scowled at him. Not because it was a particularly impressive, or mean insult, but because of his tone. Which was verging on pretty damn annoying.

Nora laughed into the phone. "_I'm guessing Casey hasn't explained this to you, Derek, but it means pretty much the opposite…"_

Casey rolled her eyes. "He knows what a fellowship means, mom."

But, when her eyes slid back to him, found him watching her with furrowed brows, her smiled dropped.

"It means more training," Casey said quietly.

"I know that."

"Which means more hours."

"More hours?" Derek asked, bristling. "_More _hours than you're working now? How is that even physically possible?"

"_Wow. Does Derek Venturi actually sound concerned? This has to be progress."_

"Heh." Derek let out a very fake, very unamused laugh. But, apparently this didn't translate over the phone, because Nora didn't comment.

"How could you _not _know that I'd be working more hours?" Casey whispered to him, ignoring Nora's oblivious amusement.

"How could you not just come out and plainly say it?"

"Sorry. I didn't know I had to be _that_ plain with you."

Derek glowered at her before slapping the island top with a loud smack. Which startled the heck out of her, because he didn't usually do that.

"Oh, you are so witty, Casey," he whispered harshly to her, "So outrageously smart and witty."

"…_.are you guys still there? Is everything alright?"_

"Mom," Casey said, not breaking eye contact with him, "We have to call you back."

"_Okay, but we just-"_

She clicked the 'end' button and stared at Derek's brooding form. "What is your damage tonight?"

"S'nothing."

"Would you stop saying that?"

Derek huffed. "What do you want me to say?"

"Honestly?"

"Well, they say that's the best policy," he muttered sarcastically.

"I want to come home after a long day of work and for you to be waiting for me and say how excited you are to see me. Not fake dunking with your buddies and insulting me from room to room like a parade of Jerk, or something."

"Well, then maybe you should have said, '_Honey, I'm home._'"

"Ugh! You are so…ugh!"

She growled and jumped off from the ledge.

"Your point is duly noted," Derek said dryly.

She ignored him, storming into the living room. And, for some reason (probably just to annoy her), he followed.

"And, you know, while we're being 'honest' here," he said with air quotes, "I would have liked to know about this whole arranged marriage with your fellowship."

"I _told_ you about that," Casey said, turning sharply on her heel, "Not that you were listening, apparently."

"Oh, and, uh, when did you bring this up? When you were at work? Or when you were at work? Or, maybe…when you were at work?"

"That's right, Derek. I'm a doctor. That's my job. Big friggin' surprise." She waved her hands with fake awe. "I haven't hidden that from you like a magic trick, or something. Y_ou're _the one who said you still wanted to do this with me. But, if you want to back out-"

"Woah, woah, woah, slow down."

His cool, aloof countenance broke open with alarm and Casey folded her arms protectively against her chest.

"Slow the _hell_ down," he said again, "What do you mean, 'back out'? Do you wanna back out, or something?"

"I dunno, do you?"

"Of course not," he said instantly, like the words were sprinting to get out of his mouth. "I mean, couples fight, right? We fight. That's sort of our thing…right?"

She sighed, and it wasn't until she let out that long, heavy breath that she realized how tense she was. How tense she'd been ever since his 'mood' had started up. Of course they fought and bickered with each other. Of course it was their thing. But, they were apparently a 'couple' now. And, Derek had been acting moody…okay, maybe that wasn't all that rare of him-

"I'm sorry," she said instantly.

She watched the worry lines smooth out on his face.

"But, it's only been what--a matter of days? And, that's the first time you've actually said we were a couple and it was because you thought I breaking up with you and--and….you've been in a mood!" she finished accusingly.

"I get dude-bitchy, I can't help it!"He ran both his hands through his hair and his eyes flickered with agitation again, "I mean, seriously don't say shit like that. What's wrong with you?"

"I'm sorry," she said again.

She took a hesitant step towards him. Thought maybe they should kiss and makeup…? Did she and Derek do that? God, this was confusing.

"I got another stupid phone call," he muttered when she was still a few feet away from him.

Her brows spiked. "From Rebecca?"

"Heh. _No," _he said firmly. "I deleted her from my phone the second you were crazy enough to forgive me…"

That was almost sweet enough to make her smile. But, she was still dreading whatever he would say next.

"From Benson, Casey." He sighed. "They want a decision by next week and I'm just _agitated_, because...I don't know how to make this decision. And, I don't want to involve you in it, because that's beyond awkward at this point. But-"

"Wait, what's that supposed to mean?"

Derek rolled his eyes. "Spacey, come on. We're dating now. Or at least trying really crappily to…" She frowned. "This isn't exactly a conversation you have with some chick you haven't even gone out with yet."

She winched. That probably shouldn't have stung as much as it did.

"I didn't mean it like that."

"Well, I'd certainly hope not," she said hollowly.

"Casey," he said, closing the gap between them. "We are sprinting forward and backwards at the same time here. I mean…"

He sighed again, and she tried to be patient with him. Tried to wait out this horrifically clumsily emotional moment, because she knew it was difficult for him.

He lowered his face towards her, still not touching her (which, again, was really bothering her), but speaking softly. "We've gotten so damn close over these last two years, I…Even before we started this, I…it was gonna suck, you know?

She swallowed, reached out and tugged gently at the front of his shirt. Tugging and gently prodding him on.

"But, we're, you know backwards, too, because we're trying something new here. Something we are both obviously really, really bad at." He let out a dry laugh. "And, the Casey that's my _friend_, I want to sit down with and have some long, complicated, overly neurotic conversation that I pretend to hate about it…but, the Casey that's my…whatever we are…I think it's a lot to take on right now."

"So what?" She shrugged and released his shirt, "You were just gonna buy me dinner on Thursday, leave town, and make this wildly huge decision without bringing anything up?"

His eyes dipped to the carpet. "I feel like answering 'yes' here would be a bad move, but-"

" 'Yes'," she answered for him. She blew out a breath. "_Wow_, Derek. Wow. That's…that's actually really shitty."

She stepped back from him, her arms hugging around her, but didn't walk away.

"Casey. It's not like that. I mean…you couldn't even give me an answer before we started this."

"That's because _you_ didn't seem to know what you wanted, Derek. That didn't mean I didn't want any say in it. That-that I wanted you to completely disregard my feelings."

He rolled his eyes. "That's not what I said."

"You didn't have to. It was pretty damn obvious."

"Oh, and what? Did I sleep through our heartfelt conversation about your fellowship?"

She straightened, eyes darting back to him. "Excuse me?"

"Have you _ever_ asked me how I felt about it?"

"What? Derek, it's not really an option. It's my career. There's pretty much only one path."

"Well, you could say same the about Benson, couldn't you? That it's not really an option to say 'no', because it's the best decision for my career."

"Derek-"

"How is it any different? I say 'no' to college hockey, I stay here in London, work less hours, have less stress, but pretty much kiss the Big Time away. You say 'no' to the fellowship, and you maybe, actually, somehow, possibly have a semblance of a life, but aren't Dr. Perfect or whatever."

Her face scrunched up. "What are you saying?"

"Nothing. I just think..." He scrubbed his forehead. "...that i't's my decision to make. And, I don't think it's constructive at this point for it to be a dialogue."

"O-okay," she said hollowly.

"Casey-"

"I um," She swallowed. "I don't think Thursday's gonna work for me, okay?"

"Don't be like that."

He reached for her, and she pulled back. "Don't touch me."

"Right." He huffed. "Just shut down again."

"I'm sorry," she snapped, "Were you expecting me to cook you a steak dinner and make out with you after that 'serenade'?"

"Look, I get you're upset."

"Pfft."

"But, I don't want us to fight like this before I go away. That's why I wasn't going to bring it up."

"Oh, how 'noble," she spat. She tugged away from the hand she'd let slip around her, and headed for the steps. "You should wear shining armor, seriously."

"_Casey."_

His voice was firm, almost authoritative, and the foreignness of it made her stop in her tracks.

"We don't have to like each other every moment we're together. If that were the case, I'm sure most relationships would be obsolete. But, you're my girlfriend. And, we do have to be _together_ to be together. That's not something we're allowed to get around…" He trailed off, his hands twitching at his side like whatever adrenaline he'd been going on wore off, "So…can I just pick you up around seven, or what?"

Casey bit her lip, kept her back towards him. "Fine," she said tightly, "It's a date."

***

_It's a Canadian miracle,_ Casey thought dryly as she smoothed down her dress.

For the first time in the history of ever, someone had broken the Rule and not been bitten in the ass. The scene was set for the perfect first date.

Well, except, for the whole sucky-angry-hurting part.

But, other than that, just peachy.

She sighed, flashed her pocket mirror at herself one more time, before checking her watch. He wasn't late yet. But, she was keeping the time obsessively, so she could bitch at him for being even a second late. Not that _she_ was feeling being, or anything.

She glanced away, then caught a glimpse of the Prince Jr. pulling up.

He was a minute early. Which was annoying, but she'd let it go.

She pushed through the double doors, and as soon as she reached the curb and was standing there waiting for him, her emotions flickered in her chest. She was upset with him. Obviously. But, this was the first date. She was dressed for a first date and it had sort of been a lame fixation of hers for a while now.

And, tomorrow he'd be gone for two weeks, which she knew wasn't long, but always felt long when the house was empty. And, when he came back, maybe he'd have to move out. An hour away. Which she knew, logically, was not far away, but would feel far away when the house was empty and she barely saw him anymore.

His car pulled up and she suddenly forgot all the angry things she'd planned on saying. She just felt…deflated.

When the door opened and he stepped out in front of her, he looked equally disheartened. And more than a little tired.

He sighed. "I wasn't sure whether you'd actually be here."

"Yeah. Me neither."

He handed her a small bouquet of flowers, and it was technically all very romantic and appropriate. Yet, she just frowned as she took them from him.

"Are they…wrong?"

"No, no," she said quickly, "They're beautiful."

His lips thinned. "Then you're still angry with me."

"I don't know what I am," she sighed. "I mean, what? We go out tonight. You buy me dinner and then you take off for two weeks to give me a practice run for when you move out?"

He stiffened. Then his face heated slightly as he stepped towards her. "I never said I'd made a decision."

"Right. So I'll just…" She shrugged. "Take a shot at 'convincing' you tonight then, huh?"

"Convincing me," he answered quietly, "Would mean that you were asking me to stay."

"I'm not asking you anything."

"I know you're not." He sighed. "It's not about that. All the 'evidence' is in, okay? Nothing that happens or doesn't happen in the next twenty fours hours is going to skew that. I just want to spend the night with you before I leave. That's it."

"Pfft. You are not getting lucky. Not even close."

His jaw flexed. "Trust me. That was already painfully obvious." He scrubbed the back of his neck. "Can we just look at this from a different angle? Say that we both really don't want to be away from each other?"

Her eyes widened with soft surprise as she watched the slight flush of his cheeks. Finally she answered, "Yes."

"Good." He straightened like he usually did when trying to manufacture confidence. "See, that's a good problem. Couples have far worst problems than that."

"Right. We just don't have the solution. And, you won't even let me help figure this out. I'm just supposed to stroll around with you like your arm candy…" Derek snorted at that, "While you make these huge decisions that affect both of us."

Her cheeks heated, and it was like she processing her emotions at same time she was sharing them with him. "I mean seriously, Derek. What do I have to do? Break up with you so you'll listen to what I think about you leaving?"

"I didn't know you _had_ an opinion about me leaving."

"Well, that makes two of us, doesn't it? Because you still haven't let me know what the hell you're thinking."

He grunted and she huffed before pushing the flowers back into his chest.

"I can't do this."

"_What?_"

"I'm not talking about our relationship. I'm talking about this date. I can't--this just cannot be our first date. First dates are supposed to be happy, and fun, and sweet. Not make me feel all sad and crappy inside."

His head dropped and his fist bunched around the bouquet. "Maybe we should just wait until I get back. See where we're at then."

She shrugged, tried to play it casual while another lump formed in her throat. "You obviously need some time to get away from…" Her face scrunched. "Distractions, or whatever."

"You're not a distraction," he said quietly.

She sighed. "Can you just take me home now? Please."

He nodded slightly. "Whatever you want."

She rolled her eyes--because that was totally not funny or ironic--and climbed into the front seat of the car.

***


	10. Chapter 10

**Wow, I got some intense feedback over the last part. Not that I'm all that surprised. I actually felt depressed just writing it. And, I know that's always a crappy way to end a chapter, so I tried my best to get out this chapter as fast as I could. Anyway, I hope this begins to make up for the desolation that was chapter eight.**

**Thanks for your feedback, as always. **

_*****_**The format of this chapter's a little different from the others. Mostly because Casey and Derek are miles apart for most of it. Hopefully, it'll catch on.**

_*******_

_**Can You Hear Me Now?, **_**Part 9**

_*******_

_**Day 1--Friday**_

She went to sleep feeling awful and woke up feeling worst.

Mostly because their first date (if you could even call it that) had been one of the most depressing nights of her life.

Also, because by the time she'd gotten up, Derek had already left.

No goodbye. No note. Nothing except that irritating, nipping, empty tug that he always left behind on trips. Times about ten.

She turned on her back and wrestled between anger, denial, and hurt, before groaning and rolling out of bed.

***

Okay, so apparently there was a note. On the kitchen counter beside a half-eaten Poptart: _Back next Friday._ -_D._

_So typically dumb and Derek._

She rolled her eyes_, _crumpled it up, and threw it in the trash bin.

***

_**Day 2 --Saturday**_

"I think my interns might be losing respect for me," Teddy said as he entered the break room.

Dan smirked. "Yeah, well, considering you got arrested by a male stripper while crying over your hamster…? That's not exactly 'stunning'."

"Yeah," Teddy said slowly, tapping his chin in contemplation, "I was thinking that might have something to do with it…But, anyway, that's all changed. 'cause I _totally_ rocked my surgery today."

"Really, Ted?" Casey said, instantly perking, "That's great."

"Yup. I'm the man with the steady hands. That's why they call me…" He paused dramatically, "Steady Bear."

"No one calls you that," Kellie said, scrunching her nose.

Casey leaned over and whispered. "Yeah, but he's been forcing some of his interns to."

"Right," Kellie mumbled, " 'cause that's not lame or desperate at all."

"That's great, Teddy," Dan said, "But…I'm a _little_ hesitant about having a known criminal working here."

Dan shared a snicker with Kellie, and Teddy groaned. "Enough with the StripperGate jokes already. I mean, dude, he was your cousin."

"Yeah, and he's got more degrees than you do, smartass."

"Plus," Kellie chimed in, "He volunteers with the elderly."

Casey squinted and watched Dan roll his eyes. "You do realize he was just saying all that stuff to get your number, right?"

Kellie sighed. "Yeaaah. I've just been doing some P.R. work so that when I go out with him this weekend, Casey won't smack me on the head."

Casey smacked her on the head. "Dating strippers who lie about old people is wrong, Kellie," she said monotonously.

"Thanks, I needed that."

Casey nodded. "That's what I'm here for."

"Okay, okay, enough of that," Teddy said, "Who's buying my lunch?"

Kellie bent under the table as if to pick up something she'd dropped (something she often did when she was trying to duck the bill), and Casey rolled her eyes. She was just about to volunteer when Dan spoke over her, "I got ya, Ted."

Her eyes widened, and even Kellie squeaked from under the table.

"What?" Dan asked defensively, "It's tradition."

"It's also very kind," Casey said.

Teddy beamed and held out his arms. "You like me. You really like me."

"Okay, okay, just for that?" Dan said, "I take it back. Casey's paying."

"_What? _You can't just decide that for me."

Teddy shrugged. "Works for me."

Casey folded her arms resolutely. "I am not caving in this time."

"What do you wanna eat, Ted?" Dan asked over her.

"Seriously," Casey cried, "I don't have do this just because I'm the 'nice' one."

"Can you spot me, too?" Kellie asked, climbing back into her seat, "I left my wallet at home."

She huffed. "Ugh, fine."

***

"What's with the perma-scowl?" Kellie asked on their way out of the cafeteria.

Casey blinked. "What?"

"The perma-scowl." She gestured to her face. "You've been moping all day."

"I have not been moping."

"Casey, come on. Bowerman told his three-headed donkey joke, and you _still_ didn't crack a smile. And, that's a classic. Even Doom laughed. What's up with you?"

Casey sighed, rolled her eyes at herself in advance for how it would sound, and mumbled, "I miss him."

Kellie's eyes widened. "Bowerman? I know he was on sabbatical, but I didn't know you two were so close-"

"No, not Bowerman," Casey said with a huff, "Derek."

She hadn't thought it possible, but Kellie's eyes widened even more. "Casey," she said quietly, "He's only been gone two days."

"I know," Casey whined, "And, I always promised myself I wouldn't be one of those girls that was all 'Oh, _wanh, wanh_,I miss my boyfriend,'; but I do, and I can't help it. Plus, the way we left things was just so…shitty."

Kellie frowned. "So, no goodbye kisses then, huh?"

She sighed. "No. He was gone when I woke up. Left some stupid post-it note saying he'd be back next Friday. Which I _already knew_," she finished with frustration.

It was silent for a moment as they walked through the corridor, Kellie still frowning like she didn't know quite what to say. Eventually, the blonde shrugged and mumbled, "I'm sure it will work out. Maybe he just needs some time to clear his head."

"Right. Maybe."

***

_**Day 3--Sunday**_

The next Cosmo rule she was about to break?

Giving in and calling her stepbrother-boyfriend who was apparently too busy, angry, or not-into-her to call her first.

Her thumb was hovering over the 'send' button. She was pretty much kissing any 'Independent Woman' dignity goodbye, and then-

'_Call me'_ blinked onto the display.

Her eyes lit.

It was Derek. He wanted to talk to her. He wanted to-

She was too busy dialing to think about it any further.

She blurted, "Derek-"

"_You can be so damn bratty sometimes._"

_What? _"What?"

"_It's not all about you, you know._"

"Derek-"

"_I have feelings, too. I may not wave them around on a giant, spastic banner everywhere I go, but I do. And, I was kind of hoping that our last night together would be _together_, not you shutting down on me down like a bad fast food restaurant."_

"Derek-"

"_You're supposed to be my girlfriend. And, you treat me worst and colder than when you weren't. And, It's just so _damn _frustrating that I couldn't even really touch you or kiss, or anything you before I had to leave._"

"Are you serious?" Casey said when he'd finally stopped. "This is why you texted me? So you could rant at me?"

"_Yeah, pretty much. Figured it was my turn."_

"I'm hanging up."

He grunted. _"Fine. Like I care."_

"Fine, you ass. And, oh, yeah, I miss you _so damn bad_. But, I guess that probably doesn't fit into your stupid rant-fest."

She hung up then, jabbing her thumb against the 'end' button. She felt pretty badass for cutting him off like that.

For about a minute.

Then she just felt even worst than before.

***

_**Day 4-- Monday**_

Maybe the Cosmo 'gods' were wrong (which was clearly obvious. But, hey, it was better than medical journals). Because, the next day Derek called _her. _Which she wasn't expecting. She was actually neurotically organizing her desk, when the house phone rang, and she reached absently for it. "Hello?" she mumbled.

"_I miss you, too._"

She started, and then felt her heart start in her chest at his voice and his words. She blinked before blurting a "Pfft, whatever," like it wasn't turning her inside out to hear him admit that.

"_Just thought…maybe you should know._"

There was a long stretch of silence, with Derek shifting and sighing uncomfortably on the line, while she just stood there, stunned.

"_Right, so I'll just-_"

"It took you a _whole_ day to work up the nerve to tell me that?"

"_Heh, actually, more like two." _Her brows spiked. "_I um, pretty much only argued with you yesterday so I'd have an excuse to call you…it's stupid._"

"That's not stupid," she said softly.

Which was a lie. Because honestly, yeah, that was pretty damn stupid. But, it was stupid-sweet: Derek's specialty.

"_O…okay."_

"I mean, don't yell at me now though, or anything."

They exchanged nervous, forced laughter over the line. She swallowed. "How are you?"

"_I'm good. Having trouble sleeping."_

"The new sheets are bothering you?"

"_Yeah."_

Derek had a thing about sleeping on unfamiliar sheets. One of the many odd facts she'd picked up over the years. Probably in some effort to terrorize him--she couldn't remember.

"I meant to pack some for you, but I uh…well, you know."

"_S'fine." _He cleared his throat. "_Work good?_"

"Yeah, yeah. I might find out about the fellowship soon."

"_Right_."

There was another silence, and Casey was just remembering how deficient Derek could be at the whole over-the-phone thing (not to mention the present awkwardness), when he mumbled, "_Yeah, so don't wanna hold ya up. I was just…checkin' in._"

"Yeah, well, 'check'," she chirped.

Casey winched. That took lame to a new level.

"_Um, okay…"_ She could hear the bemusement in his voice, "_I guess I'll 'check' you again later?""_

Her lips quirked. Because that was pretty lame, too.

_**Day 5-- Tuesday**_

Tuesday she called him. She couldn't remember where they kept the screwdrivers and there was this imaginary thing she needed to fix.

It was urgent, really.

"…_under the third shelf to the lef-"_

"Are we gonna talk about what happened Thursday?"

She could almost hear his eyes widening on the phone, see the blank expression on his face.

She missed his eyes.

"_Uhm…" _He sighed. "_You don't really care where the screwdrivers are, do you?_"

"I'm not even sure I know how to use one," she answered.

"_So, then-"_

"So, then are we going to talk about it, or not?"

She shifted on the sofa, drew her knees into her chest, and waited.

"_Didn't think there was much else to say._"

"Of course you didn't." She rolled her eyes. "That's why you're a man."

"_Well, you had a chance to bring it up that night. You know, when you wouldn't touch me, or talk to me at all?" _

She stiffened. "And, what? You were Oprah Winfrey? You didn't exactly try to initiate any conversation, either."

"_Right. Because you whining, canceling our date, and shoving away the flowers I bought you--again--just screamed 'receptive.'_"

"Well, you-"

She stopped herself. This was definitely not the road least traveled. She leaned back and bit her tongue for a moment--literally. It was the only way to stop herself from verbally kicking him in the nads. She sighed and finally said, "I don't want to fight anymore."

"_Pfft. Right, you just want to know where the 'screwdrivers' are._"

"Derek."

He grunted slightly, but didn't grumble any further.

"I'm sorry," she blurted (before her competitive_-must-beat-Derek_-instincts could kick in.)

"_What?_"

"I'm sorry. For being bitchy and spazzing out on you about your job offer."

"_Casey-"_

"No, let me finish," she said over him. "I have to get this all out before I think about it too much and back out." She blew out a breath. Tried to think of the best, most compelling way to put this: "I have to let you spread your wings and prepare to fly; for you have become a butterfly."

"…_what?_"

She scrunched her nose. "Ugh, never mind; it sounded better when Mariah said it. I just mean that I was being selfish about the whole thing. I can't expect you to make these decision based on me. But, I just freaked out because I…I don't know how to-"

She stopped herself again. Mainly, because she was pretty sure she was about to quote Mariah Carey again. But, also because saying "I don't know how to live without you" sounded more intense and clingy than she was ready to process right then, let alone say aloud to him.

"I'm just sorry."

There was this horrible moment of quiet, where she wasn't sure if she'd said too much, or creeped him out, and was really questioning the whole Mariah move…

"_I want you to be selfish for me."_

"What?"

"_I want you to want me to stay._"

"Obviously I want you to stay."

"_Well, you haven't ever said that, so tell me? How is that obvious?"_

She squinted. How could her jealous, almost neurotic desire for him _not to be away_ _from her _not be ridiculously obvious?

Oh, right. It was Derek.

She sighed, rubbing her forehead. _"_Derek. I couldn't ask you that. No matter how much I wanted it. I'm completely locked up with my job, and it wouldn't be fair for me to do that to you."

"_I'm not asking you be 'fair'. I'm asking you to be honest."_

She worried her bottom lip. "Well…do you…"

She couldn't believe she was actually about to ask _any _man this: "Do you want me to say 'no' to the fellowship?"

"Casey. _Don't say that_."

"_Derek," _she said just as firmly, "I'm not asking you to be 'fair', I'm asking you to be honest."

There was a heavy silence. She could hear him sighing and shifting over the line. Picture him running hands through his messy hair.

She missed his hair.

"_I don't know."_

She huffed. "How can you not know?"

"_I just don't… I want you to be happy. And, you say that getting this fellowship will make you happy, but, you don't _seem_ happy most of the time. Just really stressed and bitchy. And, I don't know how you're gonna handle the next level."_

She winched. "You don't think I can do it?"

"_Heh. I _know_ you can do it, Casey. That ridiculously peppy, ruthless 'can-do attitude' of yours is part of what weirdly attracts me to you. But…just because you can do something, doesn't mean you should."_

"And, this has nothing to do with me not being home as much?" she asked firmly, but not meanly.

He sighed. "_Of course it has to do with that. I freaking get Spacey-sick every other week._" Her chest tugged at that. "_But, it doesn't bother me enough to ask you not to._"

"Right," she said wryly, "Because you're not a selfish bitch like I am."

"_Hey_. _Only I get to call you names._"

Her lips tilted. Just slightly.

"_And, you were right. It's not the same. I've already been down this road; already had a chance to do the whole 'Big Shiny Dream' thing…and it didn't work out._"

His voice dropped a little at the end, the only hint behind his steady voice that he felt anything significant about it. And, the maternal part of her (the part he continuously reminded her he found aggravating) wanted to swallow him up in a hug. The fact that he never talked about what went down with his knee, or how he'd been dropped by his team, was Derek's way of saying (by not saying) how much it still bothered him.

She sighed and hugged her knees to her chest instead.

"That's just the thing, Derek. You're not on your death bed. You're not even thirty. You can still coach a pro team."

"_It's not the same. It never will be. And, yeah, at first it literally was killing me inside, but then…I realized that's there's more--or whatever those stupid MasterCard commercials say."_

"That's true," she conceded, "But, how do you know that part of your 'more' isn't you coaching the pros?"

She heard him exhale--his 'thinking' sigh--and then dimly wondered when the earth had spun off it's axis and she'd started encouraging him to leave her and take the job instead.

"_I uh, guess I hadn't thought about it that way._"

_Of course you hadn't_, she thought. _You're Derek._

Derek didn't see the forest, he was too busy being distracted by fun things and /or cleverly figuring out how to pay people to use his trees. She was so damn intense that she tried to see both the trees and the forest without sometimes seeing anything at all. They both had crappy eye sight and blind spots galore, but somehow when you put two illogical beings together, they could make really good choices.

"We have to make this decision together."

"_Casey-"_

"_Both_ decisions," she said over him. "Because, if one of us makes a dumb choice, and the other gets it right; or if one of us chooses the tamer path to be with the other, and the other chooses the 'Big Shiny' path, it's not fair. It's…not right. It won't make either of us happy."

"_Maybe….But, that's sort of a ginormous commitment to make at this point."_

She scrunched up her face. "Does that…scare you?"

"_I have to go_."

She flinched. "I'll take that as a 'yes.'"

"_No, it's not that. I'm just already ridiculously late and one of the other coaches just came out here for me."_

"Oh," she said blankly.

"_Let's um." _He cleared his throat. "_Not try to cram something like this into the next 30 seconds, okay?_ _Can I call you later?_"

"Yeah, yeah, okay."

"_Okay, bye._"

"Bye," she whispered.

***

_**Day 6--Wednesday**_

"And he just hung up on you?" Kellie said around a fry, "Ouchers."

"He didn't hang up on me," Casey said defensively, "He was just in a hurry."

"Riiight." Something caught her eye and Kellie turned and called across the lunch plaza, "Hey, Bozo, over here!"

"You rang?" Dan said dryly.

"If a girl starts to bring up something way too awkward and/or creepy and/or commitmenty on the phone, what do you do?"

He paused for a moment and Casey watched with curiosity as he considered. "Ehhh, fake phone call or fake appointment…or, if it's believable, fake death in the family."

Casey scrunched her nose at him as he took a seat at the table. "Why are we friends again?"

"Eh, I forget."

"See what I mean ,though?" Kellie said, "If anyone would be crassly honest, it's Dan."

"That's what I'm here for, ladies," he said squirting some mustard on his burger, "And, for eye candy."

"My _deepest_ gratitude," Kellie deadpanned.

Casey rolled her eyes. "But D…_Binkie,"_ she said with a grimace, "Wouldn't do that to me."

"Really?" Kellie asked with a quirked brow, "Because it sounds like classic _Binkie-_Prowl."

"I am _not _one of his pussycats."

"Uhm, uh, what?" Dan asked instantly.

Casey squinted at him and Kellie explained patiently. "That's one of his keywords. You know, to bring him back when he's zoning out on a conversation."

"Ugh, whatever," Casey grumbled, "But, he just wouldn't do that, okay? He wouldn't."

"I'm just looking out for you," Kellie said quietly, "Guys change when they get into relationships."

"Yup," Dan said, swallowing over a bite, "I think there's literally a change in our brain chemistry."

"I think it has more to do with that other, _lower_ brain," Kellie said pointedly.

"Me and my two brains resent that."

"Good, that was sort of my objective."

"Even with someone you really care about?" Casey asked.

Dan's eyes flickered over from his staring contest with Kellie. "What?"

"Would you do that with someone you really care about?"

Kellie straightened beside her and Casey watched the playfulness slowly climb from his features. He blinked. "If I loved her, no. But that's a giant 'if'."

Casey nodded, brows furrowed, and mumbled, "Thanks."

"Hey," he shrugged and offered an uncharacteristically gentle smirk, "That's what I'm here for."

_--_

"…_can you hear me now?_"

"Yeah, stay wherever you are."

She could hear him snort slightly. "_I'm sitting on the roof of my car. The reception here sucks._"

"Yeah," she mumbled, "That must be hard." She chewed her lip for a moment before saying, "Look, if what I said yesterday was way too forward, we can just ignore it. Like a redo-button."

"_What? Which thing?"_

She huffed. He could be so dense sometimes. Was he really going to make her say it again? "Derek, _that_ thing."

"…Casey. _Which thing? We talked about a lot of heavy crap yesterday; it was exhausting._"

She seriously considered hanging up on him right then and there, but fought back the urge. She sighed. "You know…about maybe, possibly, hypothetically making our decisions together?"

"_Oh…that._"

"Yeah, 'that'."

He blew out a long breath and a made fuzzy sound on the phone. "_Honestly, just the idea of making that sort of commitment with you makes me nauseous…"_

She winched. Then waited patiently for him to continue, to say something to dampen the sting. Then she waited some more.

Some more.

"_You there?"_

"Yeah, I, um, I'm here," she answered hollowly.

"_Well?"_

She squinted. "Well, what?"

Derek huffed and now, it was his turn to sound frustrated. "_Well, I have to give them my answer by Saturday. So, I'm gonna need you to skip over all the dramatic stuff, and tell me where you're at. To let me know if you're really willing to let what I think, or feel affect your career._"

She blinked. Literally replayed the last minute of conversation in her tape-recorder of a head. "I'm sorry, did I miss something? I thought it was pretty clear that just the idea of that made you sick to your stomach." She couldn't keep the edge of bitterness out of her voice.

"_Yeah."_ He sounded sheepish. "_But, I uh, threw up before the meeting yesterday, so I think I'm covered._"

"So…" She squinted. "You want to make this decision together?"

"_I think we kind of have to, right? I mean, that's how this works, or whatever?_"

She wasn't sure what 'this' meant.

"Yeah," she said softly, "I guess so."

He cleared his throat. "_So, anyway, like I said. I have to make my decision by Saturday._"

"Which means I have to make my decision by Saturday."

Even just saying it aloud made her chest tighten.

"_It doesn't have to mean that-"_

"No, it does," she said firmly. "I want it to."

"_Are you sure?"_

"Are you?" she asked back.

"…_y-yes."_

He'd stuttered it out, which would have usually sent off giant alarm bells in her head. But, she knew his sounds, and that stutter meant nervousness more than doubt. It had actually kind of tugged at her chest.

"Then so am I."

"_Okay…so where do we start?_"

***

_**Day 7 --Thursday**_

"Let me get this straight," Kellie said, "You're actually thinking about turning down the Morneau Fellowship? The _Morneau Fellowship."_

"_Shhh, _Kellie," Casey hissed.

"No," she cried, "I will not be shushed. You need to hear how crazy you're being right now. Like surround-sound hear it."

"Kellie-"

"I mean seriously, I love Derek--and apparently, you don't think he's too bad either. But, this is your _career, _Casey. You know, that thing you've devoted like a third of your life to?" She glowered. "I cannot believe he even had the gal to ask you to-"

"Actually," Casey said over her, "It was sort of my idea."

"…"

"Kellie, speechless," she mumbled dryly, "I always thought this moment would be more magical."

"Okay, you're coming with me."

Kellie grasped her arm, pulling her down the corridor, and Casey squinted before pulling away. "What are you doing?"

"I'm taking you to the E.R. Because apparently, you've suffered some major blunt-force trauma to the head."

"Kellie," she said firmly. "I'm a big girl, okay? Don't think for a moment I don't appreciate the hugeness of this. But, I just think maybe…life is more than a career, or a fellowship…"

"I'm sorry, I um…" Kellie shook her head, "I'm not computing."

"I know you're not," Casey said softly, "And, that's you, Kellie. You're a medical machine, in the best possible way. This is what you want and you go after and it makes you freakishly happy."

Kellie's face dropped, a frown digging into her cheeks. "It doesn't make you happy?"

"No, no, it does," Casey said instantly. "I know I'm supposed to be a doctor. It's what I've wanted since college. But, that's not the only thing I am. And, there's other things I've wanted since even longer…"

"Like Derek?" Kellie asked slowly.

"No, not in the literal sense--although, trust me, that's definitely icing on the cake. But, I meant a _life_. And friends outside of hospitals, and dancing, and theater, and poetry, and all those things I just don't have time for anymore. And, if I take the fellowship--assuming I even get it--it will be even longer before I can enjoy those things again."

"Yeah, I guess you'd just have to settle for solving medical mysteries and saving people's lives."

Casey sighed. "Don't be like that, Kellie. You know what I mean. I can be a doctor either way. It's not like I'll lose my degree or anything. I just maybe won't be '_the premier doctor'_ I'd always thought I'd be."

Kellie quirked a brow. "And, that doesn't bother you?"

"It does," she answered honestly, "But, not as much I thought it would."

***

"Okay." Casey flipped through her file. "Did you get everything I faxed?"

Derek snorted. "_Yeah, all twenty pages of it. Casey, I don't think-"_

"And, the charts, too, right?"

"_And, the diagrams, yeah, all of it. Look, Casey, I-"_

"And, I couldn't fax this last part, because it was too complicated. But, I calculated the risk factors, and made a parabola of the-"

"_SPACEY."_

She blinked. Then promptly shut up.

"_I am _not_ allowing you to base our future on a parabola, okay?_"

"O…okay."

"_Okay…I was thinking we'd flip a coin._"

She huffed. "Yeah, D, because that's so much better."

"_Well, at least it's less work. And, lot's less reading." _

He said 'reading' like it was a curse word and Casey rolled her eyes. "Okay, we're obviously at an impasse here. I mean, we talked about this for like four hours yesterday…"

"_Ugh, don't remind me…"_

"And, the best we can come up with is flipping coins?" She groaned. "Both options suck. We both take the jobs, and we'll be successful, but apart. We both don't take the jobs and we'll be together, but playing Monopoly or Bingo while we watch our big Shinies run away."

Derek sighed. "_Maybe this isn't going to work._"

"What?" She stiffened. "You're backing out?"

"_No, not that. I just mean that maybe we're not gonna be able to make the same decisions. Maybe one of us should decide to go for it, and the other not to._"

"So we can be together?"

"_Yeah. Well, as much as we can. Or maybe, just because 'going for it' isn't always the best choice._"

"Ugh, I'm so confused," she groaned, "I keep seeing all these dumb motivational posters in my head, and the overachiever in me--which, let's be honest, is like all of me-keeps thinking that it's obvious. That there's no other option, but to go for it; to 'be the best that you can be.'"

"_Maybe the best that you can be isn't being alone._"

She sighed. "I hope not."

***

_**Day 8- --Friday**_

Casey squinted as she plucked the note from her locker: _Emergency meeting in Annex 3._

"Okayyyy," she mumbled blankly, "Since when do we have emergency meetings?"

She grabbed her charts, wondered dimly if she was about to walk into another one of Teddy's stupid pranks, and headed to the east wing. When she got there, the hallway was dim. She opened the door, slowly, and the lights were out in there, too. "What the-"

"_Close the door!_" she heard someone call behind her.

She squeaked as she heard the door slam shut, saw the lights flash on.

"_Angh, _what is this?"

"It's an intervention," said Kellie.

"For what?"

"Kellie told us you're turning down the fellowship," Teddy answered.

Casey rolled her eyes. "I never said I was going to turn it down. I'm just thinking about it."

"Right, 'cus that's any less crazy," Kellie said sarcastically.

"Yeah, and look," Dan said, "I don't know who the hell this _Binkie_ character is, but _no one _is worth giving up the Morneau fellowship for. No one."

"Guys, I haven't even been offered it yet."

"Pfft." Kellie waved a dismissive hand at her. "It's totally in the bag. You know, assuming you don't blow up a children's hospital in the next 24 four hours."

She snapped her fingers. "There goes my evening."

"That is not funny," Teddy said firmly, "Mostly? It's just nutso."

Dan stepped forward, too, looking as worked up as she'd ever seen him. "Yeah, seriously, Case. Usually, I could care less what crazy, overemotional decision you're making. But, this is _not _okay. I mean, does your stepbrother know about this? I'm surprised he's not blowing a gasket."

Casey sighed tiredly and glanced over to catch Kellie's pointed look.

"Guys. I don't know exactly how to explain this, but…Derek…" She closed her eyes and braced herself. "…_is _Binkie."

Silence.

More silence..

"I knew it!" Teddy cried. "Eh, no, not really; totally didn't see that coming."

"You're kidding me, right?" Dan asked, "You're screwing with us so we'll back off, right?"

Casey's face scrunched and she watched as both males looked imploringly over to Kellie, who just answered them with her own sheepish shrug.

"Get _OUT_," Teddy gasped.

Dan just stood there for a moment, his eyes darting from side to side. "That…makes _so _much sense." He spun to Kellie. "And, you--the girl who can't even make it through the day without spoiling American Idol for me--kept this a secret?"

"It was literally the most painful thing I've ever done. And, I broke my collarbone last year."

Teddy was still gaping at Casey. "I underestimated you, Case. That's straight up kinky."

"Okay, okay," Casey said, holing up her hands, "Can we not fixate on the details of my dysfunctional love life?"

Teddy snorted. "No we cannot not…wait, that's a double negative…we can can…wait, is that a double positive…?"

"Ugh," Dan pushed him aside, talking over him, "We can't let you go through with this. We're your friends…I mean, they are anyway."

She rolled her eyes. "Guys, I appreciate this. I really, really do. In a bizarre, creepy sort of way, this is really sweet. But, this is a decision that we have to make on our own."

"You," Kellie said quietly.

"What?"

"This is a decision _you_ have to make on your own."

"No," she said instantly. She felt a sort of heavy-lightness surround her, "It's really not."

"That's…pretty damn intense," Dan said blankly.

"Yeah, I know. But, do you really think I'd be dating my stepbrother just for kicks and giggles?"

"And, you're on the same page about the _seriousness_ of this?" Kellie asked, pulling her attention back to her.

Casey blew out a breath. "I definitely hope so."

_*******_

"So, that's it, huh?" Casey asked him.

"_S'probably for the best."_

"And, this is our final decision?"

"_I think so."_

"Okay, well." She sighed. "I guess that's it."

"Yeah. I guess so."

_**Day 9--Saturday**_

"So?"

"So, what?" Casey asked as Kellie, Teddy, and Dan flocked around her locker.

"Oh, nothing, just thought we'd ask how your day was?" said Dan.

She shrugged. "Oh, s'okay. I woke up late. And, then I stubbed my toe on the-"

"Your decision!" Kellie cried, exasperated, "What did you guys decide?"

"Oh." She smiled. "I'm taking the fellowship."

"Oh, thank god." Teddy grabbed for the wall like he might faint.

Kellie was beaming, too. "So, Derek's staying in London?"

"Actually…no. He's taking the job."

"Oh…" She blinked. "Wow, Casey, I'm so sorry."

"No, no, it's good," Casey said instantly, "I mean, it's sad, too. But, long term, it's good."

Dan nodded slightly, and she could see his shoulders relax visibly as well. "It's probably for the best. I mean, dating your stepbro would have been like…" He lifted his hands up as to demonstrate somehow, "Stupid-crazy."

"Yeah, well we're idiots," Casey answered breezily. "We're not broken up. We're just gonna do the long distance thing. And, the not seeing each other often thing until the fellowship ends, and we see where Derek's job goes, and…" She sighed. "Somehow we'll work it out."

She closed her locker, and Kellie said thoughtfully, "And, you're happy with that?"

"Happy's a strong word. Peeved might be better. I mean, we've lived together all these years, many of which I wished he would have beamed to the opposite end of the earth. And, now we finally figure things out and we have to leave each other."

"Speaking of leaving…" Dan mumbled, rushing for the door.

Teddy followed suit after him, and Kellie rolled her eyes. "I'm not sure how much this means coming from a workaholic, but I think you made the right choice."

Casey sighed. "And, I think we did, too. It just feels like the only way we can be together without having this doubt, or resentment hanging over our heads. And, if we're really going to try to be long term, then we have to think long term. And, this is long term."

"Is long term the phrase of the day?" Kellie asked wryly.

"It's pretty much what I keep saying to myself to keep my sanity."

Kellie nodded sympathetically, and reached over to pull her into hug.

***

"…_and then, they were all 'This is the most exciting thing to happen to our program in years._'"

"Awww, honey, I'm so proud of you. You're gonna be great, I just know it."

"_Once again: don't call me that. _Ever."

Casey rolled her eyes, because as much as Derek complained about these things, he was such a flattery-whore it was ridiculous.

"_And, don't roll your eyes at me on the phone."_

She did it again, which somehow he knew, which made him grumble, which made her giggle. She leaned back into his recliner, and pulled the quilt over herself, smiling. "You seem happy," she whispered.

"_I am."_

"You sound surprised."

"_Well, you know. It was a hard choice. But, I guess I didn't realize how much I wanted it until I actually said 'yes'. And, now it's just all sinking in." _He sighed softly. "_I'm not sure how I'm gonna tell the boys though…especially Josh._"

Casey scrunched her face. "Yeah, I know. It'll be tough on him. But, I'm sure he'll be happy for you, too. And, it sets a good example."

"_Not to mention he'll have you all to himself….maybe I should be jealous?_"

She snorted, but then lowered her voice, trying to sound gravely serious. "Well, I was gonna wait until you got back to tell you, but…"

"_He's already moved in, hasn't he?_"

"Your stuff's waiting on the lawn."

***

_**Day 10--Sunday**_

"Still haven't heard anything from Dr. Doom," Casey mumbled as she turned on the faucet. She grabbed the first dish and frowned. "I'm starting to wonder if he changed his mind about nominating me. Or maybe if he'd never planned on it at all, but just followed me around, scowling for fun."

"_I know that's one of _my_ favorite pastimes."_

"_Derek._"

"Casey," he said back, "_You're overreacting. As usual. You're an awesome doctor, and you're not exactly what'd I call a slacker, so…not really seeing how you could lose here_."

She sighed. "That's sweet…"

"_Don't say that."_

"But, you don't know Dr. Doom. I heard that he made a resident torture babies once."

Derek snorted. _"From who? Kellie?"_

She shrugged a little, took her time replying. "Maybe…"

***

_**Day 11--Monday**_

"…and then the camel said, '_That's why I have three heads!"_

The break room filled with raucous laughter as Bowerman did his three-headed-camel dance.

"Oh, god," Teddy gasped, "I think I might wet myself."

"Which _still_ would not be funnier than that joke!" Dan said.

Kellie snorted, grasping her stomach. "You know what would be funnier than that joke…? Nothing!"

Casey choked over her drink (which, Kellie had warned her would be a bad move once Bowerman started up his donkey jokes), turned frantically from the table, and spit it out…right on Dr. Drew's shirt.

Dr. Drew jumped back and she paled.

_Oh, crap._

"Okay," she heard Dan whisper behind her, "So maybe _one _thing might be funnier."

Casey glowered at him, but then turned abruptly back when she heard Dr. Drew clear this throat. "Well, that was my favorite shirt."

Casey grimaced. "So, so, so sorry."

"It's…fine," Dr. Drew stiffly. His face looked like 'fine' was far from his word of preference, but he moved on. "Anyway, McGroover…"

Casey blinked. "It's…McDonald," she whispered.

"I know."

Then the weirdest thing happened. His lips twitched and broke out into a very rare, very genuine smile. Teeth and all. "Just wanted to try it out once more for old times' sake. Congratulations. I nominated you for the Morneau Fellowship."

"…"

"…McDonald?"

"Right, right. Well, I'll have to consider, obviously. But, um, I'm certainly, certainly honored for your recommendation," she said on autopilot.

Dr. Drew nodded, watching her with a bemused look before, heading out. "Alright, well, once again, congratulations."

"Thank you," she said hollowly.

The door shut behind him and Casey was reasonably sure she waited at least one whole second before flying from her seat.

"OH, MY GOD!! _GET OUT!"_

"No, _you _get out!" Teddy cried back at her.

"No, _you!!_ Oh, my god, oh my god! Yes, yes, yes!"

"You rock so hard it's making me dizzy!" Kellie cried.

Casey started bouncing again, and Teddy and Kellie immediately joined. Dan, predictably, did not. But, he was grinning. Which for him was a lot.

***

"Derek-"

"_Uhm, Casey, I'm sort of in the middle of a meeting here-"_

"I got the fellowship!!"

"_GET OUT!!"_

She heard some ecstatic laughter.

Then loud gasping and moving in the background.

"_Oh, uh…" _He sounded sheepish. "_I'm in the front row. I have to call you back._"

***

"..and, then he was all '_I know_'; like, like we're colleagues who have inside jokes and stuff. And, then-then he was all '_Congratulations_', smile-smile. Oh! I just could just die!"

"_Don't do that. Whose gonna file my taxes?"_

"Derek!"

He chuckled. "_No, I'm excited for you…" _Beat. "_…honey."_

She scrunched her nose. "You're right. That is weird."

"_Yeaaah. I'm probably not gonna do that again._"

***

_**Day 12--Tuesday**_

The next Tuesday she got another note. With flowers: _Not too shabby. -D._

She rolled her eyes. But, this time, didn't dump them in the trash.

Stupid-sweet: Derek's specialty.

_*******_

_**Day 13--Wednesday**_

"I miss you."

"_I miss you, too_."

***

_**Day 14--Thursday**_

"_What's your favorite color?"_

"Why?" She asked absently, flipping through her Cosmo.

"_I dunno. Just something I'm supposed to know, right?"_

"…it changes. But, I've always loved blue. It makes me feel hopeful, like anything could-"

Derek made snoring sounds and Casey huffed. "_Derek._" She rolled her eyes. "Why'd you even ask me, if you didn't care about the answer?"

"_I was just asking myself the same thing."_

"I hate you," she whined.

"_No, you don't."_

"For some inexplicable reason," she mumbled. She flipped through another Cosmo page, and then her eyes darted back up. "Oh, yeah, that reminds me. You're getting in at eight o'clock tomorrow right?"

"_For the last time: yes_," Derek said with a chuckle.

"I just want to make sure."

"Right, god forbid you're a little off and I show up, and you haven't perfected the universe yet."

"Just for that, I'm moving in with Ralph."

"_I thought you were already shacking up with Josh?_"

She blinked. "Oh, right. I forgot."

_**Day 15--Friday**_

Casey spent the morning cleaning the house. Obsessively. (Which, honestly? Yeah, she kind of enjoyed.)

She spent the evening cleaning again. (There was this really dusty spot in the living room).

And, then, later that night she put on the sexiest--'I'm really not trying, although yeah, I really am' dress she could think of. Which, yes, was also a lot of fun. And probably something Derek would appreciate much more than her cleaning the windows.

Now, it was just time for the waiting.

And waiting.

And, more waiting while she tried to busy herself with sitcoms, and Cosmos, and word games to keep her mind off the fact that he was a whole _fifteen minutes late._

She was crossing out another word that she'd been too distracted to spell correctly, when she heard him. Him being Prince Jr.

Her heart jumped, and then it took about a second for her feet to catch up before she was hurrying for door. She reached for the doorknob and slowed herself down. Fixed her hair. Tried to do that whole 'casual' thing she sucked at.

And, when she opened it, there he was . Standing casually in the yard like he'd just stepped out a few minutes ago to grab the paper.

He smiled at her.

"Hey, freak."

She rolled her eyes, like she was mad at him. Then she stepped outside, hurried to him as fast as she could without actually running, and kissed him. Not shyly, or softly. But, hard. As hard as she'd wanted to touch him, and see him, and hold him. As hard as hearing him pull up into the driveway had made the emotions crackle in her chest.

They'd wrapped each other up so tight their clothes were bunched and wrinkled in between them. And, Casey dimly realized that's she'd lost a heel somewhere in between the porch and jumping into his arms. But as his warm, rough mouth took hers again she couldn't bring herself to care.

She was breathless when she pulled back, but snuck into a few more hard pecks anyway, before coming back down from her tippy-toes.

Derek kept firm hands on her back, his palms splayed out possessively as he kept her close to him. His face was flushed, and his hair rumpled from where she'd run her hands through it. He looked-

"You look _amazing,_" he whispered to her.

"So do you."

Though, actually she didn't know what the hell he was wearing. It had sort of been the last thing on her mind as she was rushing out to him.

They stood there for a long moment, holding each other in the yard. She rested her chin on his chest and murmured, "You should come in. You must be exhausted."

"Yeah," he mumbled absently.

He leaned down to kiss her again, and she didn't make him chase her, but leaned up, meeting him halfway in a gentle kiss.

Gentle at first.

Then harder again as she hooked her hand behind his neck and he locked his arms around her jealously, like someone might snatch her away. She gasped as he leaned over her and deepened the kiss, making her feel things she hadn't expected, but was really digging nonetheless.

"_Mmmm, so good" _she moaned. Mostly because, honestly? It felt so good to be with him at that moment it was 'bananas'. But, also to let him hear how good he made her feel. (Because this was Derek, and she knew it would stroke his ego.)

"Yeah?"

"Yeah."

"I like that," he murmured back to her.

"I know you do," she whispered before pulling him in for another kiss.

***


	11. Chapter 11

**Hey, remember me? Your long lost fic writer? Lol, sorry it's been forever. But, a combination of writer's block, projects, and my new fascination with WOWP (insert plug for my fic, lol) , has taken me way off track. Many apologies, I know how much it can suck to wait for updates. Thanks for all my patient readers / reviewers :)**

**Hopefully, you guys enjoy. And, as always, let me know what you think….**

***

'**Tag Team, Back Again', Part 10**

***

After frenching him for what her brain was telling her had been way too long and inappropriate, but her body was telling her hadn't been long enough--they finally made it into the house. Derek still had his arms looped around her from behind and was planting kisses that made her blush on her neck, when they entered the living room.

"Are you going to kiss me like that after every trip?"

"Maybe," she answered teasingly, "If you're good."

"I can be _such _a good boy," he whispered against her ear.

Casey shivered, and she was pretty sure there was going to be more inappropriate macking, when his head jerked up. She followed his gaze across the room to the candles and the table full of food.

"Woah. What is this?"

She smiled, chewed on her lip, and watched his face expectantly. "Our first date."

His brows spiked. "You're kidding me? No expensive menus, yucky French food, or pony rides on the beach?"

"The pony's waiting in the back yard," she quipped. "But, other than that, no. It's just us. _Without _Ralph." They both smiled at that. "And, some wine, And, your favorite food…and my favorite guy."

She fought back the urge to roll her eyes and blush again, because she knew that last part had been ridiculously corny. And, Derek _abhorred_ corny.

Yet, surprisingly, he just grinned.

"Really? Who's your favorite guy?" he whispered playfully, "Where is he? In the closet? Do I have to rough him up?"

"No, actually, he's pretty scrawny. So, I think just a firm talking to should do the trick."

He simply smirked as he headed for the table. But, she stopped him on his way. She watched his face crease questioningly as she slipped her hand under the lapel of his coat, and started to slide it off of him.

"Uhm…?"

"Just sit down. Shut up. Don't do anything stupid to ruin this, and enjoy."

"Well, I can do one of those things well," he said wryly as he took his seat.

Derek, in a moment of rare politeness, waited for Casey to set his coat down and join him before lifting his fork. Yet, when he noticed her sit at the opposite end of the table, he frowned. "What are you doing?"

Casey quirked a brow. "I think in some cultures it's called eating."

"No, I mean over there." He tilted his head. "Get over here."

"No," she said, scrunching her nose, "It'll be all uneven."

He rolled his eyes. "Get over here or I'll start eating with my hands."

With most people, that would have been an empty threat. But, Casey had known Derek too long now (and had witnessed some particularly disgusting breaches of etiquette) to take the chance. Plus, she hadn't seen him, or more importantly _touched _him in two weeks, and even before that she hadn't really been able to 'touch him' touch him because of the whole repressed feelings thing. And, 'touching him' touching him had felt pretty damn new and nice outside so--

She was already grabbing her plate and heading over to him, before she could sort through all her jumbled thoughts.

She set her plate in the spot to his left, and could his feel gaze openly appraising her. The feminist in her was very annoyed; the princess, very flattered.

"Ooops," Derek said, setting his hand on the seat before she could sit there. "This seat's taken." He smirked and tilted his head to the seat to his right. "And, that one, too."

"But, let me guess?" Casey asked, deciding between a smile and an eye roll, "Your lap is completely unoccupied?"

"Yeah, how'd you know?"

She scowled at him. Very sternly. "Derek-"

"Casey, come on."

For a moment, she was inexplicably tempted. But, she'd already moved across the table, (ruining the symmetry and everything). And, she'd already literally _come to him_, which--romance or not--was stroking his ego more than she liked. Then of course there was the obvious fact that sitting in Derek's lap wasn't exactly conducive to finishing their meal anytime soon.

So, instead she yanked at the back of the chair he was holding, hard enough to actually jerk him forward, and sat there anyway.

She regarded him with a smug, but mostly sweet smile as he straightened. "I bet you invite all your 'girls' to your lap, don't you?"

"They usually don't turn me down," he answered, sitting back.

His brows were pinched, not in annoyance, but in a curious look she hadn't seen him send her before.

"Probably because they don't have the mental capacity to use a chair on their own," she mumbled.

"Mental capacity's not usually one of my… 'requirements'."

She quirked a brow. "I didn't know you _had_ any requirements…?"

He didn't answer her, because he was too busy grasping the back of her seat, scooting her towards him until the wood of their chairs clapped.

"_Oooh, _Derek."

"What, do I have cooties, or something?"

His voice was almost petulant, like it got when the T.V. wouldn't work, or his beer ran out, and he slipped his arm around the back of her chair, his hand squeezing the wood there, and rocking her gently.

"_Derek_," she said again, like she was annoyed. Which of course she wasn't. But, that was sort of her thing, so she went with it.

His hand froze, and she watched him stiffen slightly, like maybe it wasn't clear to him that this was just part of her 'thing'. His brows lifted slightly--a question--and she crossed her leg towards him slowly, deliberately, so that the inside of her leg brushed against the outside of his. His hand slipped from the wood of the chair, to the skin of her shoulder, and then there was this moment of hesitation, and maybe something else. Because, they'd skipped more than a few levels of emotional intimacy over the phone, and it was strange, but thrilling to try to catch up in person.

"I want you to kiss me," she whispered near his mouth.

He murmured, "Say it again."

"What?"

"Say you _want me _to kiss you again."

She arched her brow. "No."

"Then you must not want it that bad."

He smirked, pulling back and her hand instantly slipped between them, grasping the fabric of his shirt. "Bad-ly," she corrected.

He rolled his eyes. Then she slipped her hand over his thigh, squeezing slightly. "Do you want it badly?"

His eyes flickered, the humor instantly departing, and she reached over and brushed her palm across his cheek. Then she ran her fingers gently through his hair, her fingernails scraping teasingly and tucking soft strands behind his ear. She felt him shiver.

His phone buzzed and she sighed. "Ignore it."

"I uh." He blinked, like he was waking up from something, "I told the guys not to call me tonight."

"Yeah, and if you don't answer," she murmured, "Maybe they'll finally learn to leave us the heck alone."

"Maybe, but…"

"Ugh." Casey sighed and reached across him, slipping the phone from his pants pocket and flipping it open. "It's Josh." She cocked her head. "Okay, so you're allowed to answer. But, after this, we need to give him an earlier bed time."

"Yes, ma'am," Derek said with an eye roll, taking the phone back from her. "What's up, Chump? Woah, woah, woah, slow it down…."

Derek straightened in his chair, and Casey frowned.

"Okay, so where are you now…? Branson? What are you, challenged?"

'_Branson?' _she mouthed back to him, and he nodded again, scowling.

"Three-Cube? What--ugh, never mind. Just _stay there_, okay? And, you better believe you're running laps until you're thirty."

She rolled her eyes, and she could hear Josh mumbling on the phone for a few more moments, before Derek finally hung up. He grunted at her and her face scrunched.

"I'm gonna have to reheat our food, aren't I?" she asked.

"Yup."

He sighed and reached for his coat. "Josh got caught up in some weird stuff at a pickup game, bet away his bus pass…" He shook his head and grabbed his keys, "I dunno. But, his mom's out of town, so I need to pick him up."

Casey snorted. "Alright, Mr. Mom."

Derek sent her a less than pleased look and headed for the door. She hesitated for only a moment, before standing and following. "Branson's not exactly…" Her nose scrunched. "A nice neighborhood."

His lips quirked. "What, you worried about me, '_honey_'?"

She glared at him, but it was harmless. "More worried about the clueless teenager without a bus pass in the middle of the night, _honey._"

"Yeah, I know; that's why I'm gonna hurry over there…" His lips twitched. "…Honey."

She let out a small laugh, and sent him a sideways glance as she slipped her heel back on. "Now, tell me you didn't enjoy that….just a little."

"I didn't enjoy that," he answered automatically, "Not even a little."

"Pfft. Me neither," she lied, throwing him that patented 'I'm a horrible liar shrug', and he smirked.

She slipped on her other shoe, and glanced back up at him. "Can I come with?" Off his surprised look she continued, "For Josh. Not you."

His eyes lit playfully and he sighed, placing his hand over his heart. "Okay. But, if we're gonna do this, I gotta know you're devoted to me, Casey. No more dating around.."

"Yeah, yeah, whatever."

"Classic C-Prowl."

***

They moved quickly, although there was a little roadblock in the drive way. (Derek hadn't opened the car door for her, which she'd found particularly grievous on a first date. He'd argued that it wasn't 'technically' the first date anymore; that it was some sort of hiatus. She'd huffed, and pouted, and then he'd given her a quick peck to move the process along, etc, etc).

Five minutes later they were in the car.

"What do you want to listen to?" Derek asked, as the car slipped back out of the driveway, "Anything but chick pop."

"First of all," Casey said, reaching over to click on his seat belt for him, "Kelly Clarkson is not 'chick pop', okay? She's very liberated now."

"What, you mean she doesn't shave her pits?"

"And, _scceenee_. On to the next conversation," she said dryly.

Derek's lips quirked as she reached into her purse and slipped out a cd. "What's that, 'honey'?"

She narrowed her eyes at him. "It's a c.d." Her eyes slid away a bit sheepishly, "I made it for you while you were gone."

She slipped it into the c.d. player hurriedly, and counted back in her head: _3...2...1._..

"_A mixed tape_?" Derek squeaked, "You made me a mixed tape?"

"It's not a 'mixed tape', okay? That's so undignified and cliché." He raised an incredulous brow. "And-and, it's not even on a tape of any kind. I burned it."

"Can I 'burn' it, too, then?" Derek said, nose twisted.

"_Hey_, you haven't even listened to it."

"I know, that's why I'm not crying yet." Off her scowl, he added, "..tears of joy?"

She scowled at him. "It has _all_ your favorite songs on it, you big creepy face."

He scoffed. "How would you even know-"

She hit 'play', cutting him off, and his face instantly broke out into a goofy grin. "I _love_ that song!"

"Uh, ya duh." She rose her hand as if waiting for a high five. "Who's the best girlfriend ever?"

Derek was still grinning, but he didn't answer; just shook his head.

"Yeaaahh," Casey mumbled, "Didn't think that was gonna happen."

"Doesn't suck though," Derek said, turning up the volume, "It better than not-sucks."

Derek speak for_: "Thank you very much, my dear." _So, she didn't push it.

"You know what does suck though?" he said after a moment.

"If you say, 'Kelly Clarkson, honey', I'm breaking up with you."

He rolled his eyes. "No, not that…although." He shrugged slightly, "That would have been high-larious." It was her turn to roll her eyes. "I meant Josh. I haven't exactly gotten around to telling him or the guys about my new job. Or….maybe even hinting about the possibility."

Casey's eyes widened. "You didn't tell them?"

"Heh, well, yeah, didn't quite get around to it."

"_De-rek. _What, were you just planning on not showing up to practice one day, and hoping they caught on?"

"Eh…" He paused, considering. "Yeah, pretty much."

Casey sighed, but restrained herself from lecturing him--she could tell that beneath his aloof demeanor, he was stewing about it. "I'll walk you through it later," she said quietly, "I have note cards for this kind of thing."

"_Or," _Derek interjected, "I was thinking maybe you could talk to him for m-"

"No way in hell."

"Yeah," Derek mumbled, "Didn't think that was gonna happen."

***

If the car doors hadn't already been locked, she would have clicked them shut the moment they reached the "Branson" exit. It was _that_ nice of a neighborhood. (And, also, yes she did go ahead and click the 'lock' button anyway, earning another eye roll from Derek.)

"It's _not_ that dangerous here," Derek mumbled, although his hand slipped into hers on the console between them.

"Yeah, I'm sure that's exactly what Grammy Popkins said right before she got carjacked."

"Um, a-what-now?"

She huffed. "Don't you read the paper?"

"Of course not."

"Some old lady, Grammy Popkins, got mugged out here last week."

Derek squinted for a moment, before his eyes widened with recognition. "Oh, you mean that lady who left her car unlocked and running outside the Quickie Mart?"

Casey nodded earnestly and Derek sent her a disbelieving look.

"You're lucky you're cute."

"Um, once again, ya duh; I'm adorable," Casey said instantly, earning a soft lip tilt from him. "But that's not the point. That woman was still robbed."

"Casey, come on. _I_ would have robbed someone that careless." She glowered at him. "And, don't worry," he said, lowering his voice dramatically, "I'd protect you….ya know, after I was sure the Prince was okay, of course."

"Of course," she said sarcastically.

"Oh," Derek said suddenly, "Here's our turn."

The car took a quick jerk, Casey grimacing and squeezing back at his hand, before pulling into a basketball court outside a rec center. Casey squinted out the window, her eyes searching out and finding a small crowd of teens huddled around a makeshift hockey goal. "What is this?" she asked Derek, "Some underground, drug selling , gangbanging hockey cult?"

Derek blinked. "…it's a called a pickup game, Case."

"Oh, right." She shrugged. "That was my next guess."

Derek shook his head, sending her a baffled, yet amused look. "Why don't you just wait here, and I'll-"

"No," she cried, "We can't split up. People always split up in the movies right before they get butchered."

He sighed. "You've been watching the Sci-fi channel while I'm gone again, haven't you?"

Her eyes crept to her lap. "…maybe."

"Ugh, just hurry up and come on."

He closed the door behind her and quickly slipped out of her seat. They met up at the front of the car and she instinctually slipped her hand between his arm and his chest--which, judging by his expression, seemed to both annoy and please him at once.

"_Dude, are those your parents?_" she heard a voice call out.

She huffed. _Seriously, how old do I look? I knew I should have pulled my hair up-_

"No, 'dude,' we're not his rents. I'm his coach," Derek said curtly. Casey watched him glance tiredly at the group of teens. "Now, which one of you pre-schoolers scammed Josh's bus pass?"

The teens were silent for a moment, most of them squinting between Derek and her, before one particularly tall, cranky one stepped forward. Casey guessed he was about 16. "I'm Three-Cube," he said firmly.

Casey's face lit up. "Ooooh, like in Algebra?"

The teen scrunched his brows and asked, "Is that a country, or something?"

"Wow," she whispered, "That's so sad. It's just like in that documentary I was watching. About underprivileged--"

"Okay, so moving on," Derek said over her. She pouted as he continued, "What's your real name, kid? I'm not calling you that."

He shrugged. "I also go by Joe."

"Okay, then 'Joe',' Derek said sardonically, "I'm sure this has been thrilling and all, but I'm gonna need you to give him back that bus pass, so I can go home and finish my date." Casey's eyes widened, her eyes darting to Josh's squinting face. She elbowed him in the ribs, and he instantly fumbled. "_Growing_. Date growing. I grow dates; you know, the fruit."

Josh shook his head from where he'd been slinking back. "Coach D, that's just…not okay."

Derek sent him a look which instantly shut him up.

"Sorry, can't do that," Joe said. "A deal's a deal. We played one on one, and he lost, and I won. And, Three-cube always follows through on his bets."

"Does three-cube always talk in third-person?" Casey mumbled.

Joe squinted again. "What?"

"Ugh, never mind." She tugged at Derek's arm. "Derek, let's just go. We can buy him another bus pass."

"No." Derek shook his head, and slipped his arm from her grasp. "It's the principle of the matter."

"Since _when_ do you have principles?"

"It's hockey," he hissed back at her. "You know it's different."

He looked utterly scandalized by her accusation, and she rolled her eyes as he started to slip off his coat. "Okay, Joe. What do you say, double or nothing?"

Joe snorted. "You're kidding me, right? What is this, Old timers day?"

There was a chorus of chuckles, including Josh, which earned him another steely glare from Derek. Casey--who, _obviously_, thought this was the worst idea since his and Ralph's electric pudding maker--responded instinctively despite herself. "What?" she asked, "Is Three-cube afraid he might get 'schooled'?"

"Casey," Josh stage whispered, shaking his , "Don't use slang."

Derek ignored him as Joe stepped towards. "You're on, gramps."

"That's _Coach_ Gramps to you," she hissed for him.

Derek sent her a befuddled look, but didn't complain as he finished shrugging off his coat. "Oh," she cried, suddenly remembering, "But, what about your knee?"

"Forget it," he said cavalierly, " I'm made of steel."

She rolled her eyes. "You don't have to do this to impress me."

His lips quirked, surprised. "Because you're already impressed by me?"

"No, because it's not impressive."

He scowled at her, pushing the coat into her hands, and she frowned as Josh came towards him. The teen handed him skates, beaming . "Coach, this is _so_ awesome. It's like a 'Rocky' movie, or something. You know, one of the later one's when he comes back from retirement."

"We are _not_ that old," Casey whined, crossing her arms.

Josh backtracked instantly, "No offense, or anything.. I just meant because of his…aged maturity?"

She shook her head. "Eh, thanks for trying."

Derek interjected, scowling at Josh as he slipped on the skates. "You do realize you're in trouble for eternity, right? I mean literally until the end of time."

"I know, I know," Josh said hurriedly, "I owe you _so _big for this."

"Even bigger than that," Derek answered.

He finished lacing up his skates, and then grunted slightly as he pushed back up from the bench. "Okay, let's do this."

"This is _so_ Rocky," Josh cried.

Derek sighed and grabbed the hockey stick.

***

"That's it, big D! Do that…hockey thing!" Casey cried from the sidelines.

She and Josh were watching intently from the bench--Casey expressing her enthusiasm much more ecstatically--while Derek and Joe faced off. It was a tie game so far, 3-3, and the first person to five won.

"I can't believe coach is this good," Josh whispered.

"I can." She squealed when Derek did a deke, but then grimaced when Joe checked him slightly, knocking him off balance, "Oooh, he's gonna be sore for a year." Her eyes darted to Josh. "Not that we're old or anything; this is just a brutal game."

"Right," Josh said dryly. His lips quirked again when Derek did another move, between Joe's legs. "Sweet. He's gonna have to teach me that one for next season."

The smile slid off her face, her eyes dropping. "Yeah…definitely," she mumbled softly.

"_Oh, snap_!" she heard a teen across from her cry, "Three-cube totally got deked! He's on the ground."

"And, still on the ground!" Casey called, "How you like 'dem apples, sucka!"

She scrunched her nose, glancing back at Josh. "I shouldn't have done that, huh?"

"Nope."

She shrugged, and looked back to the court. Where Joe was still on the ground. Which she thought seemed a little dramatic; Derek hadn't even touched him.

She rolled her eyes.

Until, _still, _he was on the ground.

She saw Derek bend over him suddenly, ripping his helmet off, and she sprung from the bench. "_Oh, my god, is he okay?"_

She sprinted over to them, a group of teens running after her to the middle of the court. Derek looked up at her, face pale. "I-I don't know. He-he was fine and he-he just…" He shook his head. "I don't know if he's breathing."

She went on autopilot, her hand jumping to his neck, and then her ear hovering over his mouth. "He doesn't have a pulse," she said, instantly. "Someone call 911. Tell them to bring an AED."

"A what?" one of the teens asked.

"Just _do it!_"

"Uh, uh, alright," the teen fumbled, slipping out a cell phone. "Good thing I stole this last week."

"Is he going to be okay?" Josh called over her shoulder.

"Fine," she said hollowly, tipping Joe's head back.

She puffed a gasp of breath into his mouth. Then she thrust the heel of her palm over his sternum. She started pumping. "1 -2-3-4-5-6-"

"It looks like you're hurting him," Derek said, his voice hushed.

"Well, it should a little if you're doing it right."

_25-26-27-28-29-30._

She leaned over him, put her ear to his mouth. Still nothing. "Shit."

"What's going on?" Derek asked.

She didn't look at him. "Everything's fine."

She puffed in another two breaths, and then started pressing again.

"1-2-3-4-5-6-7..."

Still nothing.

"27-28-29-30."

She checked for breath again. _This is not happening. _

"Casey," she heard again. Derek's hand was on her back. "What should we do?"

"I'm doing what we can do," she said tightly, her hand pumping against his chest again. "But, we need an AED. And, I have _no_ idea how long it would take an ambulance to get around this type of area."

"An, aid-y?" Derek whispered, squinting.

She sighed. "It's-it's a machine, that can restart the heart."

"And, it looks like a little computer, with the little wires on it?" said another, lanky teen.

"Um, yeah, actually." -_15-16-17-18_

"I've seen one of those. In the rec center."

Her eyes widened. "Oh, thank _god_. Then get it. Now."

"But, it's locked."

"Then break the hell in!" Casey cried.

The boy--along with everyone else there--gawked at her and she huffed. "Look, your friend has about five minutes before permanent damage kicks in. So suck it up, and break in."

She didn't wait for a response, just checked his breath again. And, seconds later she heard several footsteps taking off. A pair of which were Derek's.

***

"Got it," Derek panted, sprinting back minutes later.

His shirt was ripped, and his hand bleeding, but she didn't have time to question him.

"Great. Okay, set it on the ground next to me."

"O-okay."

She gripped Joe's jersey and tugged as hard as she could until it ripped down the middle..

"Now, what?" Derek asked.

"Now, put the patches on his chest like the pictures show, while I pump his chest."

Derek nodded, his hands shaking slightly, but working quickly to stick the pads to him. "Uh, okay."

"I got it now," Casey mumbled. She read the screen and continued the compressions until it told her and waited for the shock.

'_CLEAR'_ blinked on the screen and she pulled back as the shock went through him.

Then, immediately, she started compressions again.

_27-28-29-30_.

The screen blinked, _NO SHOCK_, and she checked his pulse.

"Oh, thank god," she panted. She set her ear over his mouth. "He's breathing."

There were audible sighs of relief and she felt Derek's forehead dip down against her back (_had he been doing that the whole time?_), his breath hitting the back of her neck. There was the sound of sirens, and screeching tires in the background, and she rolled her eyes. "Oh, _now _they show up."

***

"Is he okay?" Derek and Josh called in unison, the instant Casey walked back into the waiting room.

She exhaled, her head nodding gently, as she met them halfway. "Thankfully," she said on a sigh. "This is a horrible neighborhood, but St. Luke's is _great_ hospital. We got him stable again."

"Oh, my god," Derek gasped, running his hands wildly through his hair, "I thought I'd killed the kid."

Casey reached out instantly for his shoulder, squeezing. "It wasn't your fault." Her eyes slipped to Josh's brooding form. "Or anybody else's. He had a heart condition, which probably would have been set off soon anyway, no matter what sport he was playing." She sighed again, brushing the frenzied strands of hair from her face. "I'm just _so_ glad that there was an AED there."

"I still don't know what the heck that is," Josh said, "But, thank god _you _were there. You guys are like…" He shook his, head looking between them with awe, "Superheroes or something. Old superheroes, but still."

"Heh." Casey let out a dry, breathy laugh. "I wouldn't go that far. I think we were all just insanely lucky tonight."

Her eyes drifted away, her mind fuzzy with relief, and then she heard Derek whisper by her ear, "_You were amazing._"

Her eyes widened, and she turned to him instantly, as his hand rubbed her back. Then her eyes slid to Josh, who was watching them strangely, and instantly stepped back.

"Let's get back to London, huh?"

***

"God, what a night."

Derek sighed as he slipped back into the car, the door shutting heavily behind his. Casey moaned her agreement. "How's Josh holding up?"

He rubbed his forehead. "I think he's still processing everything, but…" He shrugged slightly. "He'll be okay. And, honestly, I think a huge part of him still thinks tonight was like the 'coolest thing ever'," Derek said dryly.

She snorted. "Oh, to be a teenager again."

"You couldn't _pay_ me," Derek said. "And, I'd do almost anything for a buck."

"You're preaching to the choir," Casey murmured, her lips curving slightly.

Derek shifted in his seat. Then reached over and rubbed tenderly by her neck, making her sigh. "How're you holding up?"

"Good," she answered softly, "I'm just glad he's okay. A lot of kids…aren't," she finished plainly.

"Yeah."

She slipped her hand over his, and then brushed her lips against his bandaged knuckles, "How are you?"

"Heh. I think the manly response would be, 'Fine, babe,'" he said in a deep voice. "But, actually, I was more than a little freaked out."

His eyes dipped, sheepish, and she spoke instantly. "That doesn't make you any less of 'man', Derek. It just makes you human. I mean… Teddy fainted our first day in the E.R. And, you," She smiled gently, her eyes lighting slightly, "Pulled a 'Rocky' and punched through a glass door. You saved his life."

She kissed his hand again, and his gaze softened in that way that made her chest warm.

"And, you were amazing," he said again.

She rolled her eyes.

"I'm serious, Casey. I mean, that's like what you do every day. You help save kids. And, that's…freakin' _sweet._"

His face lit up boyishly, and she was helpless to do anything but lean over and press a kiss to his cheek. "You were great with Josh," she whispered, "And, even with Three-Cube and the rest of the kids. Despite how completely bizarre and inappropriate the whole bet thing was…they really responded to you."

"Yeah, nothing says 'I respect you' like a good cardiac arrest," he deadpanned.

"You know what I mean," she said sternly. "You're just…." She sighed, her voice soft and a little wistful and she smoothed her hand down his chest, "Good with them, you know.."

"We make a good team," he said instantly, surprising her. "We always have. You know, except for the whole, not being able to stand each other thing."

"Except for that," she agreed quietly, running her hand affectionately through his hair.

***

"So, here's what I'm thinking…." Derek mumbled into her shoulder.

Casey raised a wary brow, and shifted slightly towards him in his lap. (She wasn't proud that he'd worn her down, but she was tired, so, bygones).

"Potato me," he said, trailing off, and Casey rolled her eyes before lifting the fork of mashed potatoes to his mouth. He swallowed, and then nodded, continuing. "Right, so where was I?"

"You were thinking, sweetie."

"Right," he said again. "I'm thinking that we should never_, ever_ go on a date again."

Casey scrunched her nose. "We have had a pretty bad run at things, huh?"

"I don't think 'bad' even begins to cover it."

"But, we were superheroes tonight," She said with a tiny shrug. "That counts for something."

"Yeah, well. I'm a superhero to these kids every day, big whoop."

He shot her his signature smirk, but she couldn't quite muster a smile in response. She watched his lips tug down into a frown. "What is it? I got 'tatoes on my face?"

"No, no, it's not that." She sighed. "I just…I think you really need to tell Josh about your decision soon."

His face dropped, and he glanced away. "Yeah, I know."

"I don't mean to be a downer," she said quickly, "I just don't want him to get hurt... Or you," she added softly.

His eyes widened. "What's that supposed to mean?"

She paused, chewing at her lip, and tried to map out this conversation in her head. Derek didn't like talking about feelings, especially vulnerability, so she needed to bring this up without really bringing it up.

"You think _I'm_ the attached one here?"

Ungh, so apparently that whole him knowing her ridiculously well thing, kind of spoiled her subtlety.

"That's not what I'm saying." Except it was. "I just think maybe you should take a moment to acknowledge what you'll be leaving."

"You think I don't already know that? That I'm just guessing my way through this?"

His face pinched with frustration, and, for some reason, she thought a little hurt. She shook her head, rubbing his shoulder soothingly. "No, no, honey, that's not what I'm saying. I just….ugh, forget about it. Let's not go there tonight, okay? I want to be able to spend _some_ drama free time with you before tomorrow."

He still looked tense, reluctant, so she nuzzled softly by his neck like she knew he liked, until she heard him sigh a little, felt his shoulders fall. "You were _very_ impressive tonight," she whispered in his ear, letting her lips brush against his earlobe.

She felt him shiver again, and then slip his arm around her, stroking up her back. "Are you just saying that?"

A little. "You were awesome. With all those dekes, and goals, and….other sexy things I don't know the words for."

She finished with a breathy laugh, and then it was muffled by his mouth on hers, turning her gently in his lap as he kissed her.

She'd missed his mouth.

And, his hands, which were smoothing the bare skin of her back, stroking her neck as he pulled her closer.

She tipped his head back and deepened the kiss, moaning slightly against his lips.

Then she squeaked out an '_ohh,_' at the bump in his lap.

"Ummm." Her eyes widened. "Is that a banana in your pocket, or are you just _really_ happy to see me again?"

He rolled his eyes, but she could see his cheeks flush slightly. "It's not what you think. I have something for you."

She arched her brow. "It better not be a pervy something. Not on our first date."

He snorted. "No. It's more like a 'gift' something."

"Oh," she cried again, this time beaming, "You brought me back something? That's so sweet."

"Yeah, well." He shrugged it off, "It's no mixed tape, but-"

She cut him off with a slap to his arm. "Show it to me. Now. I can't wait!"

"Okay, okay. But, if you keep bouncing in my lap like that I really _am _gonna get happy."

It was her turn to blush, and Derek smirked before slipping his hand into his pocket. She watched curiously as he pulled out a slender, rectangular jewelry box.

"Oh, my god," she gasped.

His eyes shifted uncomfortably. "It's uh, nothing big. I just, saw it somewhere and figured, 'hey', what the heck, I've got extra coin now. Figured it might stop you from whining for one sec-"

"Derek, stop," she said softly. She smiled. "You're ruining it."

"Right."

She slipped the box from his hand, and opened it slowly. It was a beautiful silver necklace, with a deep, rich blue jewel on the end. Her eyes sprinted to his. "It's my favorite color," she whispered.

_/"What's your favorite color?"_

"_Why?" She asked absently, flipping through her Cosmo._

"_I dunno. Just something I'm supposed to know, right?"/_

"You really _were_ listening."

"Heh, well, let's not get carried away here. S'probably just a coincidence."

"I'll wear it everyday," she said over him, reading right through his pathetic attempt at coolness. "Well, except when it clashes too badly with my outfit. But, _most_ days."

"Eh, whatever."

He shrugged, but she could see the hidden spark of satisfaction in his gaze, and she smiled before reaching to slip the jewelry around her neck.

_***_


End file.
